looked up at the old man who seemed bowed with sorrow, and yet so accepting. She offered him a teary, rueful smile. “Please, you’re trying to comfort me. You’ve lost your only child.”
He looked back at her a long time. “I always knew that I would,” he said quietly. “And still, what a fine, bright boy! The love we shared will remain in this old heart as long as it ticks. I was privileged to have him as long as I did. Remember this, those we love do live forever in our hearts. You’ll remember his voice. The things he said that made you laugh. I can’t explain this, but…Josh wasn’t really for this world.”
“He has gone to a far better place,” she whispered, wincing at the way the words, sincerely meant, could sound so trite.
“He was different, Darcy. You must have known that.”
“Smart, sweet, wonderful,” she whispered.
Josh’s father was still smiling. He reached into his wallet suddenly, producing a card. “I doubt if I’ll be around the old homestead here much anymore. Please, take this. If you ever need help, if you ever need to just talk, call me. Come see me. You have great folks of your own, Darcy. I know they’ll help you through. But if you’re ever confused, lost…call me. Remember that I am—was—his dad. I’ll always be there for you. You were always there for my boy.” He hesitated. “And you may find that you need me. Remember this, please, I’ll always be there.”
He touched her head gently, then walked away, leaving her at the coffin. She stood there for several seconds, feeling the breeze touch her face, noting again the unbelievable blue of the sky. Down by the road, her parents were waiting. They would give her all the time she needed.
She saw that Hunter, leaning on his crutches, was waiting as well.
She didn’t think that she could bear to talk to him.
She knelt down in the earth at the head of the coffin, suddenly overwhelmed with bitterness. “Oh, Josh, I will never speak to him again,” she whispered softly, then shook her head. “God help me!”
She closed her eyes. It seemed that Josh’s voice entered her head. “Darcy, hey, don’t be so hard on Hunter. You know, he realized that Mike was being a homicidal jerk. He tried.”
The voice was so real that her eyes flew open.
The day hadn’t changed. The sky was still blue, the breeze still soft. The coffin still lay in the mechanism that would shortly bring it deep into the ground.
Tears welled in her eyes again. She closed them tightly, and prayed. Then she rose, kissed the coffin, and murmured. “Josh, I will never forget you. And like your dad said, you will always be in my heart. Always. If I live to be a hundred.”
At last, she turned away. She started for the road where her parents, and Hunter, waited.
For a moment, the hate remained. She couldn’t even look at Hunter. Then she remembered Josh’s words, so real in her mind. Don’t be so hard on Hunter.
He was still crying. She managed to walk to him and place a hand on his arm. “You tried,” she said very softly.
“Oh, Darcy!” he whispered sickly.
“You tried,” she repeated. “One day…one day, we can talk again.”
Amazingly, she felt better. And she knew that Hunter had tried. She knew, too, that his leg would heal. His heart never would. He would live with the night in which Josh and Mike had died all of his life. And he would fight the guilt in his soul just as long.
Her mother was waiting with outstretched arms. Her father, too. She ran to them, and let them do all the right things they thought that they could do.
That night, her mother gave her a sleeping pill, since she hadn’t really slept since the accident.
And it was the pill, she was convinced the following day, that caused her strange dreams.
She was back at the cemetery. It wasn’t a blue day anymore. It wasn’t exactly gray, either. It seemed that there was a cast of silver, like a mist, over the day. Time had passed, and she walked through the old gnarled trees, ancient graves, and newer ones, that composed the cemetery. Josh had been buried beneath a beautiful old oak. She walked toward it, clad in black, bearing a bouquet of flowers.
And yet…
As she neared it, she saw a thin man standing by the old oak. Frowning, she came closer. And it was Josh.
He looked very handsome, dressed in the dark suit, tailored shirt, and crimson tie in which he had been buried. His dark hair was trimmed and brushed, as it had been for the prom. He was leaning against the tree, arms casually crossed, smiling as she came.
For a moment, she was afraid. Only a moment.
“Josh?”
“Darcy, poor Darcy,” he said softly. His rueful smile reminded her of his father’s when he had spoken to her over his son’s coffin. “Darcy, you’ve got to know. It’s okay. Honestly, it’s okay.”
“It’s not okay, you’re dead.” She frowned, amazed to realize that she was a little angry with him. “You knew it, Josh! You knew you were going to die. The day that Mike threatened you…you said that maybe you’d be dead, but he’d be dead as well. And he is!”
“I know. I’m sorry. He was a true jerk, but I didn’t really hate him.”
“Josh—”
“I’ve got to go, Darcy. I just wanted you to know that I’m okay. I’m really okay. And you’ve got to go on.”
“I will, Josh, but…I never knew how much I’d miss you,” she whispered.
He touched her hair. Except that…he wasn’t real, and of course, it was just a whisper of the breeze.
“I’ll always be with you, Darcy. When you need me, just think of me. Here.” He laid his palm against his heart.
“Oh, Josh!”
He was fading. Into the silver color of the day. Of course. It was a dream. A drug-induced dream.
He smiled. “You’re special, Darcy. You’ll need to be strong,” he said softly.
And then he was gone.
It began the next day.
Her father had determined that he wasn’t going into work; neither was her mother. They were going to spend the day with her, take a drive to the nearby mountains, and just spend time in that quite and beautiful part of their state.
He couldn’t find his Palm Pilot.
“You left it on the counter of your bath,” she told him.
“How on earth would you know that? Were you in our room, sweetheart?” her dad asked.
“No,” Darcy said, startled herself. “I just…well, I guess it’s a place you might have left it.”
He
