over again. He had turned her life into a nightmare, and now Lucas had betrayed her. She couldn’t take it again. She just couldn’t take it!
That same thought was in her mind when she got home. Only it didn’t feel like home any more. It was a place of deception and treachery and she couldn’t spend another night in it. As she looked round the lounge she had spent so many happy hours in, she knew that she was going to leave Lucas. However much she loved him, the trust was gone. If she stayed, she would never trust a thing he said or did, and that would destroy her, so she had to go.
Not just go, but vanish completely, so that she would never see him again. It was the only way, for her love for him might undermine her resolve if she saw him. It might tempt her to stay and try to live with the doubts. No, she must go and never look back. The prospect almost made her break down, but she knew she had to be strong. Later she could fall apart. When it was done. When it was all over.
It was that strength of purpose which made it possible for her to pick up the phone and call her parents. She couldn’t leave without explaining why. After a few rings, her mother answered.
‘Hi, Mum. I…I just wanted to tell you not to be worried if you don’t hear from me for a while,’ she said, her voice catching as she worked hard to keep her emotions under control.
Her mother instantly sensed there was something wrong. ‘Why? What is it, Sofie? What’s happened?’
Sofie drew in a shaky breath. ‘I’m leaving Lucas, Mum,’ she declared tautly, and heard her mother gasp.
‘Leaving Lucas? But why? What’s gone wrong? I thought you were so happy.’ Her mother sounded almost as distraught as Sofie felt.
‘I can’t explain now. Just know that I have to do this. I can’t…’ Her voice broke and she had to bite her lip hard. ‘I don’t know when I’ll see you again, but I’ll write to you.’
‘Oh, Sofie, don’t do anything hasty. Come and talk to us. Perhaps we can help.’
Sofie blinked back scalding tears. ‘Nobody can help. I’m sorry, Mum. I love you both. Don’t worry about me. Goodbye,’ she ended on a broken whisper and set the phone down before her mother could say anything else.
Almost immediately the phone started ringing again, but she ignored it. Going up to the bedroom, she took two large cases from the dressing room and packed everything that she intended to take with her. She hefted them downstairs, leaving them in the hall whilst she went to the desk in the lounge and wrote the hardest letter she had ever had to write. She simply told Lucas she was leaving and that he shouldn’t waste his time looking for her. She wasn’t coming back. Then she sealed it in an envelope, wrote his name on the outside and propped it up against the clock on the mantelpiece.
Finally she rang for a taxi and, whilst the driver stowed her cases, she locked the front door and dropped the keys back through the letterbox. As she went down the steps for the last time, she walked away from all her hopes and dreams.
‘Do you know which station has trains going north?’ she asked the driver.
‘Depends which part of the north you want, love,’ he told her and she shrugged.
‘Just take me to the closest one,’ she told him and sat back, closing her eyes.
It was over. She had done what she had to do. Now she had to find a way to live the rest of her life without Lucas.
CHAPTER ONE
‘WELL, I’m glad I don’t have to tell him that!’ Sofie exclaimed with a laugh as she turned to gather a fresh glass of champagne from the tray of a passing waiter.
Everything was running smoothly, just as she had planned. When her boss had put forward the idea of a photographic competition, she had agreed enthusiastically, never expecting to have the job of arranging and running it. However, it had been a challenge, and she was always prepared to stretch herself. That she would also have to host the award ceremony and help give out the prizes was not what she’d wanted. Drawing attention to herself was still something she preferred not to do. Staying out of the limelight was vital. However, as this was only a local competition, with no chance of a report getting into anything other than local newspapers, she had felt safe in agreeing to do it.
Life had been far from easy these past few years. She had scrimped and saved, trying to keep her head above water by doing any job that turned up. In the end, though, circumstances had forced her to apply for assistance under a new name, and life had improved gradually. Now she had a steady job and a small rented cottage to live in. Even though she had never seen anyone from her past life, it was hard to make herself stop looking over her shoulder all the time. She had come almost as far north as it was possible to go and still be in the same country. Paying cash for everything, she had left no paper trail behind her. Sofie Antonetti had vanished off the face of the earth that day six years ago, and in her place was Sofie Talbot, photographer’s assistant, who kept herself very much to herself. If she was lonely, she never let on. If she was sad, only her pillow knew.
With a satisfied sigh she ran her eye around the room, checking that nothing had gone awry. The action took her away from the group she was chatting to and brought the doorway of the room into her line of sight—just in time to see the tall figure of a man walk in and pause to survey his surroundings. Shock tore through her with all the destructive force of an earthquake, because this was not just any man. She recognised him instantly. Would know him if a hundred years had passed, for he was locked in her heart and would always remain there.
It was Lucas. He had found her.
She couldn’t move in those first few seconds, not even a muscle. This was the day she had dreaded for so long, and yet had longed for in the very depths of her soul. To see him again filled her with unbridled joy, as she had come to think she never would look upon his beloved face again. Oh, she had daydreamed about walking into him in a crowd, or sheltering from a summer storm under a tree and finding him doing the same, but without any real hope of it happening. Yet now it had.
The first shock was passing and pent-up emotion rose to choke her throat and bring the smart of tears to her eyes. He hadn’t seen her yet and she took advantage of it.
Through a crystal blur, she ate him up like a woman who had wandered hungrily in a wasteland and had suddenly found food. She had loved this man beyond reason and doubt from the first moment they had met. There had always been a certain something about him which had made her senses leap in a way quite out of the ordinary for her. No other man had been able to hold a candle to what she had experienced with Lucas. This awareness had hit her like the proverbial ton of bricks. All her senses had come to attention, and she had been so attuned to him it had been uncanny. So much so that, whenever he had entered the same room as herself, she had felt it immediately. Like electricity charging up the air.
She could feel it now, as she stared at him. He hadn’t changed. His hair was the same blue-black she remembered, though he must be thirty-six now. In one of the Italian designer suits he had always preferred, a glass of champagne in one hand and the other casually slipped into his trouser pocket, he was the epitome of a man in control of himself and the world he lived in. It was an air of savoir-faire which she had always found immensely attractive.
Was there any surprise then that she had fallen headlong in love with him and married him, all in a whirlwind matter of months? She would do it again in an instant—except for one huge problem. Whilst she still loved him, and always would, she knew in her heart that he could no longer love her.
That
