While Patricia pretended to watch the dogs, she scanned Jesse’s profile—features familiar yet changed—a man she no longer knew. A man, unfortunately, still capable of capturing her eye. The thought disturbed her. Patricia liked to think of herself as immune to tall, dark and rugged.
When he turned suddenly toward her, she focused her attention on the wiggling canine on her lap, hating that she’d been caught staring. “This one’s cute,” she said, scratching the dog’s ears. “He looks like one of those movie dogs. You know, the sweet, scruffy stray.”
His expression turned almost wistful. “You used to love those kinds of movies. They always made you cry.”
She nodded, hoping she appeared less affected than she felt. “I remember. The happy-ending tearjerkers. My goodness, how many of those did we watch?”
Too many, Jesse thought, his heart clenching. Cuddling in front of the TV with Tricia was an image that still haunted him. How many times over the years had he thought about her, missed her, ached for her?
Tricia had changed, grown even more beautiful than in his memories. She wore her silky brown hair a tad more stylishly these days, a professional chin-length streaked softly with golden lights. Her body had blossomed into a womanly blend of cleavage and curves, and those legs, those long trim gams looked as though they had the strength and agility to wrap themselves around a man for hours. And they had, he remembered, as his groin tightened. Those were the most painful images of all. The youthful passion, the sensuality of shyness, the tender, inexperienced lovemaking.
Fresh out of high school, Jesse had moved to Marlow County in search of his roots, but found Tricia instead. Nervous about college, he’d gone to the public library where he’d debated signing up for a free literacy program. When he’d walked away without joining, she had approached him—a sleek brunette in shorts and sandals claiming she had volunteered as a tutor. He’d lingered over her in one slow torturous gaze and fell instantly in love. And then three months later his world fell apart.
As Jesse gazed up at the porch roof, his mind drifted back to the day Tricia had betrayed him. She had come to his apartment that August afternoon, looking tired and pale.
“I shouldn’t have told my father about your scholarship,” she said, her voice shaky.
Jesse shook his head, dismissing her guilt. He’d just had a life-altering confrontation with her father—a man who despised him. “You didn’t know he’d be able to use it against me.” A cruel twist of fate had dealt that card, it wasn’t Tricia’s fault.
Her voice continued to quiver. “What did you say to him?”
“Nothing.” Pride had kept him silent, masking the rage. Jesse knew Raymond Boyd had been trying to destroy his relationship with Tricia since it started, but despite her father’s wishes, she had continued to date him. That thought gave him hope. After all, it was modern-day Oklahoma, and they were both adults—strong-willed eighteen-year-olds. A poor Indian boy loving a rich white girl was no longer a crime. “Don’t worry, I’m going to fight back.”
Immediately her eyes filled with tears. “How? There’s nothing you can do that will change any of this.”
Jesse took a deep breath. He could go to a different college, one Raymond Boyd didn’t have an affiliation with. It wouldn’t be easy, but with Tricia by his side, he could accomplish anything. She was part of his strength, his soul.
“I want you to move in with me, Tricia.”
The tears collecting in her eyes began to fall. “If I do that, how will you be able to go to college? You know my father meant what he said. He’ll have your scholarship taken away.”
Jesse’s scholarship was from Winston College of Veterinary Medicine, a privately funded institution providing an education in conventional veterinary medicine as well as extended studies in holistic remedies, acupuncture and homeopathy. In spite of Jesse’s reading difficulties, his advanced knowledge of herbal healing had earned him the rare scholarship. But now, Raymond Boyd had the power to take it away.
As it turned out, Tricia’s father and George Winston, the founder of the college, were fraternity brothers. So if Jesse didn’t end his relationship with Tricia, he’d lose his scholarship. Fraternity blood, as Raymond had put it, was thicker than water.
Jesse dried Tricia’s tears, then took her in his arms, the fragrance of her hair, silk of her skin, creating an ache. Being that much in love scared the hell out of him, as did the fear of living without her.
“I know that if you move in with me, I won’t be able to go to Winston,” he said, explaining his frantic plan. “But I’ll find another school that will accept me. And I’ll apply for financial aid. There must be government grants available.”
“Oh, Jesse.” She blinked back another stream of tears. “You know how important the holistic care program is to the dean at Winston. So far, it’s the only veterinary school in the nation that offers extended studies in alternative medicine. It’s where you’re meant to go.”
Deep down he knew what she said was true. The ancient practice of herbal healing had been passed on to him by Tall Bear, a Creek medicine man, and it was Tall Bear who had introduced Jesse to the dean at Winston, offering a trade. Jesse would assist the director of the holistic care program in exchange for an education in conventional veterinary medicine. The dean had agreed to the unusual scholarship proposal, but if George Winston, the man who held the purse strings, suddenly changed his mind about funding it, the deal would crumble.
Jesse trapped her gaze. “I don’t want to lose you, Tricia.” Healing animals was his destiny. But so was Tricia. Choosing between them wasn’t possible. He was willing to make sacrifices to have them both, work himself to the bone if he had to. And he knew Tall Bear would understand. The wise old medicine man would tell him to follow his heart. What Raymond Boyd proposed to do might not be illegal, but it was unethical. Morally wrong.
Jesse took Tricia’s hand and squeezed it. “Somehow I’ll find a way to make this right. Maybe the dean at Winston will help. Maybe he’ll recommend me to another school.” Jesse swallowed back his nervousness, his fear. “Please, Tricia, move in with me.”
“Oh, God. I can’t. Not now.” She paused, inhaled a deep breath. “First of all, I would never expect you to prolong your education for me. You deserve that scholarship. Think about it, Jesse. We can be together after you finish college. You can come back for me.” She closed her eyes, then opened them, blinking away her tears once again. “If we moved in together now, we’d never make it financially. We’d never earn enough money to survive, let alone get you through college.”
Jesse pulled away. Money. The word alone clenched his gut. Once, Tricia had convinced him there was no dishonor in being born poor, orphaned or learning disabled. But suddenly the shame, the humiliation of being poor ripped through him like a knife, slicing his heart in two.
When Tricia lifted her hand to his cheek, her gentle touch made his skin burn—a sickening combination of love, hate, confusion and pain. She had just chosen her father’s money over him. She wasn’t willing to live in a tiny apartment or ride around town in a battered pickup. She wanted the luxury her father could provide, the fancy car and designer clothes.
“Come back after you finish college,” she said, skimming her fingers over his jaw. “Come back for me, Jesse. Prove to Daddy that—”
“Damn it, Tricia,” he
