with first. What about you? Do you want more kids?’
‘I do. Absolutely do,’ said Neve, looking out across the water. ‘Kit doesn’t, though.’
‘Ah, tricky that one.’
‘And before you ask, yes, we did talk about this before we got married. I just thought he’d change his mind eventually. I didn’t realise it was a for ever decision.’
She felt a tear slide its way down her cheek and she dashed it away. What was wrong with her? Crying like this? It wasn’t her style.
Again, Jake put his arms around her, resting his chin on her head. She could hear his heart thudding through his chest – a steady, reassuring beat. Neve lifted her head, her mouth stopping a hair’s breadth from Jake’s. He moved forward, kissing her. A small flutter of a kiss, as if testing the waters. Neve felt herself respond. He kissed her again, only this time longer and deeper. Neve gave a small whimper as her body curved to his and his broad hand slid down her spine.
‘I can make you happy,’ said Jake, breaking from kissing her, but still keeping her close. ‘We both want the same thing.’
Neve permitted herself to fantasise over his offer. She would be with someone who actually wanted a baby as much as she did. It would be her ultimate dream come true. She’d have to give up Kit and Poppy, of course. Was she prepared to do that?
It was a sobering thought and with it the bubble of desire burst. She pulled back from Jake and out of his arms.
‘Oh, Jake, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.’ She put her hand to her forehead. ‘I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking straight.’
He blew out a long breath, a resigned look on his face. ‘Don’t be sorry,’ he said. ‘I shouldn’t have come on to you like that.’
‘Let’s just forget that happened,’ said Neve, although she knew full well she wouldn’t be able to.
‘No, let’s not,’ said Jake.
‘What?’
‘I don’t want to forget that. Forgetting means it meant nothing. And whether or not it’s the right time, or if there will ever be a right time, it did mean something to me. It still does.’ He went to hold her hands but changed his mind. ‘Don’t dismiss this as nothing.’
Neve looked into Jake’s eyes which flamed with a passion that matched his words. The intensity startled her. He was right, it shouldn’t be dismissed as nothing but she also knew she couldn’t entertain the idea further. ‘I need to get home,’ was the only thing Neve could think to say, as she turned and broke into a jog across the meadow and out onto Copperthorne Lane, Willow trotting along beside her.
Neve checked her watch. Bugger! She had arranged with St Joseph’s that she would collect Poppy from school that day, so she could have a chat with the teacher about how the day had gone for Poppy, and whether there needed to be any extra support in light of the bus stop incident.
Neve just had time to drop Willow at home and jump in her car to get to the school for three o’clock.
Twenty minutes later, Neve was seated in the head’s office, with Poppy’s teacher sitting on the opposite seat.
‘Thank you for coming in, Mrs Masters,’ said Mrs Ogden, smiling at Neve. ‘We’ve kept a close eye on Poppy today and Miss Walker, the classroom assistant, has spoken to me as well.’
‘How has she been?’ asked Neve. She went to cross her legs and was horrified to notice her once-white Converse were now sporting a sludgy dried tide mark courtesy of the footpath around the meadow. Damn it. Neve tucked her legs under the chair instead.
‘On the whole Poppy has been fine,’ assured Mrs Ogden. ‘She’s engaged with the lessons, no particular mood swings or any difficult behaviour. The only thing we did notice was at lunchtime she was particularly upset because one of the other children wouldn’t sit next to her.’
‘Ah, that will be Callum,’ said Neve. ‘He was going to share his cucumber sandwiches with her.’ She gave what she hoped was a knowing look.
‘Oh, I see,’ said Mrs Ogden.
‘Yes, apparently he had promised her yesterday.’
‘Right, it seems Callum had a change of heart.’
‘How did Poppy take it?’
‘Got a little angry. Wouldn’t eat her lunch at first. Miss Walker sat with her and persuaded her to eat something. Poppy wouldn’t actually say what was wrong and in the end, she stood up, pushed her chair backwards and marched off.’
‘Sorry,’ said Neve. ‘As you know, that’s her way of dealing with difficult situations at the moment. To walk off.’
‘We spent a lot of time with Poppy this afternoon, talking her reactions through. It was tricky as she wouldn’t tell us what was wrong,’ said Mrs Ogden. ‘However, now we know, we can perhaps make some headway with her tomorrow. If that’s all right with you?’
‘Of course,’ said Neve. ‘We have spoken to Poppy about the dangers of walking off but talking to you it’s highlighted, to me at least, that she still needs a lot of support in processing her emotions and how she interprets situations.’
They talked some more about Poppy and her behaviour and Neve felt reassured that the school were keeping a close eye on her daughter and constantly striving for ways to provide Poppy with the tools to deal with everyday situations. The school’s reputation for their pastoral care was one of the reasons her and Kit had decided to move Poppy there.
‘Thank you so much for all your support,’ said Neve, as the meeting came to a close and she stood to leave. ‘We do appreciate it.’
‘Not at all. It’s our pleasure,’ said Mrs Ogden. ‘Now, I think Poppy should be sitting outside the office waiting for you. Miss Walker was going to bring her along.’
Poppy was indeed outside, reading a book, lost in her own world. She looked so young and vulnerable, thought Neve. Poppy looked up and seeing Neve, closed her book and stood up.
‘I’m hungry,’ she said.
‘Well, we’d better get you home, then,’ said Neve, taking Poppy’s bag from her. She thanked Mrs Ogden again and headed out to the car.
‘Your shoes are muddy,’ said Poppy, as she fastened her seat belt.
‘I know,’ said Neve, trying hard to push away the thought of her and Jake down by the river.
‘You’ve gone red,’ said Poppy.
‘Have I?’ said Neve, aware that her cheeks were burning from a mix of guilt and pleasure. ‘It’s rather hot in here.’ She slipped off her jacket to emphasise her explanation.
‘You’ve got red paint on your face,’ continued Poppy, pointing to Neve’s right cheek.
Neve’s hand flew to her face and she pawed her skin with her fingertips. It must have been from where Jake touched her earlier. Good job Kit hadn’t seen it first. ‘I must
