Bessie’s funeral arrangements. He told her it was to be held on Friday, where and when, said they’d see her there and then ended the call.
As Derek replaced the receiver, Pearl came downstairs, her face pale and drawn. He held out his arms and she walked into them to lay her head on his chest as she spoke. ‘I didn’t make Kevin sound like a saint. I just told him what Bernie said – that he thinks Kevin has changed – but John doesn’t want to know. He said from now on, he’s only got one father, and that’s you.’
‘Are you happy with that?’ he asked.
‘Of course.’
To Derek her reply sounded terse, and his irrational fear of losing Pearl rose again as he blurted out, ‘Do you love me?’
She leaned back to look up at him. ‘You know I do.’
‘Say it then.’
She looked puzzled. ‘What’s brought this on?’
‘Just say it, Pearl.’
‘For goodness’ sake, I love you, Derek Lewis. There, are you satisfied?’
‘I would be if it sounded like you meant it.’
‘This is ridiculous and after seeing the state John was in I’m not in the mood for this,’ Pearl said as she pushed his arms away. ‘Now I’ve told you I love you, and maybe after all these years of marriage I don’t say it enough, but neither do you.’
Derek hung his head. ‘Yeah, you’re right and I’m sorry. It’s just that with Kevin being released and all this talk of him turning over a new leaf, I thought you might want to go back to him.’
Pearl’s eyes widened, her voice high as she cried, ‘Are you mad? Not only did he almost kill a defenceless old man, while awaiting trial he was also accused of raping a young woman. She had no proof so the charge was dropped, but as I’d once had a taste of Kevin’s perverted idea of lovemaking, I knew she was telling the truth.’
There was a gasp of horror and they both turned to see John standing behind them on the stairs. He stood frozen for a moment, a look of sheer horror on his face and then, as he had done earlier, he fled.
‘Oh no!’ Pearl cried. ‘Derek, he must have heard everything.’
Nora appeared, her face creased with confusion as she asked, ‘What matter, Pearl?’
‘You see to Nora and leave John to me,’ Derek said. ‘I’ll go and speak to him.’
Pearl nodded, looking sick with worry, while Derek was inwardly raging. So it was true – Kevin was a rapist, and thinking of his sick, evil hands on Pearl, Derek wished that he was standing in front of him now.
His huge fists clenched – fists he hadn’t used since his days as a boxer, fists he had never used outside of the ring, yet all he wanted now was to use Kevin Dolby as a punchbag.
Chapter Eleven
It was Friday and Dolly was growing impatient. Eleven days had passed since Kevin’s release but he hadn’t been to see them again. She had no idea how to contact him and cursed herself for not thinking to ask for his friend’s address and telephone number in Ealing.
‘I still feel a bit odd,’ Bernie complained. ‘I hope I’m not losing it like my father when he was around my age. Maybe I should see the doctor.’
‘I suppose it wouldn’t hurt,’ Dolly agreed. She’d been crushing a half of one of her pills to mix into Bernie’s tea in the mornings, but wasn’t worried about him seeing the doctor. In fact she could just imagine how the consultation would go. The doctor would ask Bernie what the problem was and he’d voice his worries, list vague symptoms: that he lacked energy, felt tired, and that his head felt sort of muzzy. It was hardly enough for the doctor to diagnose anything, let alone the onset of early senility.
‘My head feels a bit clearer so I think I’ll leave it for now.’
‘Suit yourself,’ Dolly told him, already planning her next move. The last few days had been a trial run, one with unexpected results. Bernie thought that he was going senile and she could play on that to gain control of him – and the purse strings again.
Kevin would be so grateful when she gave him a large donation for the refuge, and he wouldn’t have to live in one room. They’d both live in a nice house or flat, and though Dolly had no intention of living in Battersea again, there were other boroughs. There was John too. Once he saw how much his father had changed, the lad was sure to want to live with them and that would be one in the eye for Pearl.
Pearl sat through Bessie’s funeral service, Derek on one side of her and John on the other. Nora was beside John, weeping gently. There were few people behind them: most of Bessie’s old acquaintances had died or moved away.
Pearl was in tears too, though she was still reeling from all the changes Bessie’s death had wrought. She could understand why Bessie had put those conditions in her will, but knew that if she had just walked away from it all, from the shop and the premises, it wouldn’t have been necessary to tell John about his father. Nor would he have overhead her spouting her mouth off to Derek about the rape. It had been an awful week since then, John quiet, withdrawn and unwilling to talk about his feelings.
Pearl lowered her head while a prayer was read. She felt sick inside and now feared that their lives would never be the same again.
A hymn was sung, a few words spoken by the vicar about a woman he had never met, and for Pearl it felt so little to mark the passing of someone who had lived on this earth for seventy-nine years. The curtains had drawn in front of the coffin, but there was a pause, as though they were all waiting for something else to happen, for something else to be said.
Pearl rose to her feet, dabbing her cheeks as she began to leave the pew, but then saw that Nora was still seated, blocking both John’s and her mother’s path. John bent over Nora speaking so softly that Pearl couldn’t hear what he said, but Nora at last stood up, her face wet with tears.
Once outside, Pearl saw that her mother had led Nora to the scant display of floral tributes, while John held back. She knew it wouldn’t be long before Nora would start looking for her, so took the opportunity to hurry to his side. ‘John, thank you for taking care of Nora. She’s still finding it hard to cope.’
He just shrugged then walked away, while Pearl felt a tug on her arm and turned to see Lucy Sanderson. ‘Oh, Lucy, Derek told me that you’d called to ask about the funeral arrangements. I’m so sorry, I should have let you know, but it completely slipped my mind.’
‘Don’t worry about it,’ she said, biting her lip before adding, ‘Pearl, can I have a quick word with you?’
‘Yes, of course you can. We’re going to the Nag’s Head for a bite to eat and a drink if you’d like to join us?’
‘I’m afraid I can’t come and that’s why I need to talk to you before you leave. I know this isn’t really the time, or place, and I feel awful for bringing this up, but I’m desperate, Pearl. Do you by any chance know who I should talk to about my wages?’
The penny dropped and Pearl felt awful. She knew how hard things were for Lucy, but in the light of all that had happened she
