agreed Joel. ‘I have a feeling they had a lot of tragedy. I think Lily might have died quite young, but I’m not sure. I should ask Mum.’ He felt a sudden odd surge of kinship with Edward, who’d clearly known heartache too.
‘This is amazing,’ Kezzie said, ‘real social history. You must show Eileen – you know, who lives on our road. She’s interested in all this stuff, and wants your help on the committee. I reckon a gardening museum would be interested in this. It’s fascinating.’
‘And it’s taking up an awful lot of our time,’ said Joel. ‘I think we’d better get this trunk downstairs and look through it at our leisure.’
By the time they emerged from the loft, blinking in the sunlight and covered in dust, Lauren had fed the children, put Sam down for his nap, and produced a monster pile of bacon sandwiches. She was sitting in the lounge watching CBeebies with the twins.
Joel popped his head round the door with a plateful of sandwiches, while Kezzie went to freshen up.
‘Thanks for this,’ said Joel, ‘you didn’t have to.’
‘No, I didn’t,’ snapped Lauren waspishly.
‘Oh, no. Sorry.’ Joel felt wrongfooted, but then Lauren’s tone softened as she said, ‘So did you find anything interesting?’
‘Yes, it was incredible,’ said Joel, who was really feeling fired up by the morning’s discoveries. ‘There was a trunk with loads of letters in, and Lily’s diaries – that’s Edward’s wife – and pictures they’d both done, but no sign of any plans yet.’
‘That’s a shame,’ said Lauren, but she didn’t really seem interested. ‘Come on girls, it’s time to go.’
‘Oh, do you have to go so soon?’ said Joel. ‘I was hoping to get back in the garden for a bit this afternoon.’
‘Well, you’ll have to hope won’t you,’ said Lauren, with exasperation. ‘I do have other things to do, you know.’
‘Yes, of course,’ Joel ploughed on. ‘Sorry. I thought maybe the money could be useful …’
‘The money is always useful,’ exploded Lauren. ‘That’s not the bloody point. I’ve got to walk the girls to their granny’s for a sleepover so I can work a late shift in the pub. I don’t have much of a life, but not all of it revolves around you and Sam.’
‘Oh,’ said Joel, ‘I’m really sorry, I didn’t think—’
‘No, that’s the problem,’ said Lauren. ‘You never do. Come on, girls, time we were off.’
‘Oh,’ said Kezzie, looking embarrassed, as Lauren swept past her. ‘What was all that about?’
‘Me putting my size elevens in it again,’ groaned Joel.
‘Well, you do treat that poor girl like she’s a bit of furniture, sometimes,’ said Kezzie.
Joel looked a bit rueful.
‘I know,’ he sighed. ‘I don’t mean to. She’s so much better with Sam than I am.’
‘Not better, necessarily,’ said Kezzie. ‘Just different. I think you need to spend a bit more time concentrating on being a dad and not letting other people do it for you.’
‘So you wouldn’t help me by getting Sam up from his nap then?’ said Joel as a telltale sound of gentle wailing proclaimed Sam was waking up.
‘Nope,’ said Kezzie. ‘I’m nobody’s nursemaid. Least of all yours.’
Edward and Lily
1893
Lovelace Cottage
Heartsease
February 1894
My darling Edward,
I trust this letter finds you well. I wish I could be by your side drawing all your discoveries, as I used to when we went on our country rambles, here in Sussex. I cannot imagine how you manage in such a hot climate, with only poor Mr Salter to help you. He doesn’t sound as though he is the best or most interesting of companions!
I long to see you, and hope that you will be back in Heartsease in the summer when our son – I am sure it is a son, he kicks so lustily! – will be born. Won’t it be lovely to have a baby in the summer, sitting out in our beautiful garden? I cannot wait to see him or you.
Hurry home to me soon, my love, we both grow impatient!
Your loving wife
Lily
Delhi
March 1894
Dearest Lily,
You are quite right, Mr Salter is a poor companion compared with you. He suffers badly in this heat, poor chap, constantly takes snuff and I suspect from the way his hand shakes in the morning he secretly drinks. He tries very hard, but his skills in drawing are nothing like yours, but I don’t have the heart to tell him so. Besides if I got rid of him, I’m not sure who would help me.
I hope to be finished with my expedition towards the end of the month, and am aiming to be back in Heartsease in June, just in time for the baby to be born.
The days cannot pass quickly enough till we meet again.
Your ever loving
Edward
Lovelace Cottage
Heartsease
May 1894
My dearest Edward,
I am sorry to write with sad news, but Lily’s baby arrived too soon. The doctor did all he could, but your son was born with the cord wrapped round his neck. He died soon after he was born. Lily is distraught and has not risen from her bed since. I cannot persuade her that her grief is too much and she should be more restrained. She is like a wild child when I try to calm her. The doctor has been and prescribed laudanum, but I fear for her wits if she carries on like this.
I hope you will be able to return soon, Lily needs you.
Your ever loving Mother
Delhi
May 1894
My dear Mother,
Thank you for you letter. I write to you with a heavy heart. I am sorry to be away once again, when Lily has need of me. I know you will look after her as I would. She is too fragile sometimes for this world, I fear, and bears her sorrows more keenly than others do. I am sure God will see fit to bless us with a child soon. I wish Lily could share this hope, but sadly she does not.
I hope to be home as soon as I can. Until then I remain,
Your ever loving son,
