that I almost believe him. I understand his words to mean: I tell nobody about him, he tells nobody about me. I close the door quickly, unsure whether I should tell Mona. His story clashes with hers, but I’ve just arrived – I really don’t want to be getting involved in a war of words with anyone, especially when it’s none of my business.
Finally, I shrug and make my way to the recreational room, deciding not to give it any more thought.
My first mistake.
“You took your time!” Mona says loudly when I enter the rec room. “Our lunch break is almost over.”
“Sorry,” I say. “It’s just been a while since I showered without having to worry about a Whistleblower walking in on me.”
They laugh and welcome me into the room. There are more Flawed here who I didn’t meet last night, and they greet me. Evelyn wants to show me her cartwheels, which she does all around the room while her mother, Cordelia, tries to stop her.
“I’m sorry.” Cordelia sits beside me. “Evelyn’s been here since she was two years old. She’s always excited by new people. It’s a rare thing.”
“It’s okay. She’s sweet.” I smile, feeling sad for the little girl.
“Welcome.” Bahee takes my hands; his are warm. “I hope you slept well.”
“Much better.” I smile. Despite the nightmares, it was an improvement on sleeping in the farmhouse where the fear and anxiety kept me awake most of the night. I feel guilty for sleeping when Granddad is being held in the castle because of me.
“Good. I’m sure you needed it after your recent journey. We’ve all been in your shoes, remember; we all understand how difficult the adjustment is. It takes time, but we’ll help you. You’re welcome to stay here as long as you want,” he says, smiling warmly.
“Thank you,” I say.
Bahee claps his hands suddenly. “Okay, my friends. Thank you for gathering on your break, and to those of you who took unofficial breaks: Eddie will kill you, but don’t blame me.” He throws a warning look at Mona, who laughs in her cleaner’s uniform. “Let’s show Celestine North what we do here.”
The couches are moved to form a circle. I sit beside Mona. Carrick hangs back, standing outside the circle, arms folded, leaning against the wall, serious expression, always on alert.
Kelly sits beside me. “You and I need to have a chat,” she says excitedly with a wink. She holds my hand and squeezes it. I can understand Carrick’s discomfort with his mother wanting so much so soon. She is so eager to be back in his life she’s grabbing at everything that’s connected to him. Adam sits beside her and taps her thigh with a hand, a gesture that I read as an instruction to calm herself. She apologises to me and lets go of my hand.
Rogan stays in the same dark corner I met him in last night, on a bean bag, near the computer games. He comes closer to the edge, to see what’s happening, and he ends up glaring at Carrick for most of the time, studying his every move.
“Many people have come and gone from our tribe; all of them have been welcomed in with open arms and love,” Bahee begins. “Before I became Flawed, in my previous life as a scientist I went on many travels, had laboratories and factories all around the world, which took me far and wide,” he says, and it feels as though he’s talking directly at me, that this is all for me. “It’s what I miss most: stepping off a plane, breathing in and smelling the air of a new country, or feeling the heat of the hot African sun hit me.” He seems frozen in a memory momentarily and everyone waits patiently, possibly remembering those moments of freedom, before, when we took them for granted. “But I consider myself lucky to be able to share news of my travels with those who haven’t.” He directs this at Evelyn.
“On my travels I came across the Babemba tribe of Africa, who could teach this nation a thing or two. The tribe believes that each human being comes into the world as good, that each person only desires safety, love, peace and happiness. But sometimes in the pursuit of these things, people make mistakes. When a person makes a mistake, he or she is placed alone in the centre of the village. All work stops and everyone gathers around to take part in a beautiful ceremony where each person of the village shares all the good things that the individual ever did in his or her lifetime. Every positive story, their good deeds and strengths are recounted. At the end, a celebration takes place and the person is symbolically and literally welcomed back into the tribe.”
“That’s beautiful,” I say dreamily. If only.
“These are my favourite days,” Mona says.
“So, Lennox, as a new arrival to our home. Stand up,” Bahee says, and Lorcan, Fergus and Carrick cheer him on. Lennox grins and sits in a chair in the centre of the room, acting as though he’s a rock star taking to the stage, waving as though there are thousands of us in his audience.
Evelyn jumps up and down with excitement, wanting to start it off.
“When Lennox first came here he was so nice to me. He used to carry me around on his back and pretend that he was the daddy monkey and I was the baby.” Lennox becomes embarrassed. “And he was the first person I ever heard burp the alphabet.”
Everyone laughs.
Evelyn continues. “Lennox is always happy and makes jokes and I love that about him because he makes everybody else happy. But then Lennox was sad one day. I found him crying in his room and asked him what was wrong. He was looking at photographs of him and his wife surfing. He said that he missed the sea. I told him that at least he’d seen the sea. I’ve never ever seen the sea. I’ve been here most of my life. The next time Lennox went out when he wasn’t supposed to, he came back with a shell for me. He told me to put it to my ear and whenever I wanted to hear the sound of the sea then all I had to do was listen. And always, when I feel a bit sad, I put the shell to my ear and I close my eyes and even though I’m just in my cabin with Mum, I imagine I’m on the beach, my toes in the sand, and the waves are crashing and I’m in my swimsuit and I’ve made dozens of castles and Lennox is surfing with his wife. So thank you, Lennox, for giving me the sea.”
Cordelia wipes her eyes, tears for her little girl, who has missed so many experiences while living here in the facility.
Kelly starts clapping and everybody else joins in.
Lennox clears his throat. “Man, this is going to be hard.”
And it is, but it is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever witnessed – a room of people heaping praise on somebody and through their stories I receive a huge insight into Lennox’s character. Sure he’s a wisecracking smart-arse, but he has a kind soul. It also teaches me more. Lennox is married, or was, so where is his wife? What happened? What did he do to become Flawed? I know now after Mona’s reaction last night not to ask that question so easily. Yet I can’t help but wonder what everybody did in here to become Flawed, especially Carrick’s parents.
Eventually everyone but Carrick and I have spoken about Lennox.
“That’s it,” Bahee says. “Celestine,
