with her.”
“How did you get through college?”
“I got to go to SMU free because they were such widely respected professors there. They gave me a small allowance above that. So I did just fine.”
“I think I’d like to punch them in the nose,” John snapped.
She didn’t want to admit that his words meant anything to her, so she asked about his situation. “What about you? Where’s your mother?”
“She died when I was four. Dad always says she was the love of his life, but I figure they would’ve divorced if she’d lived.”
“You don’t believe in love?”
“I can’t say no. I see people like Mark and Elizabeth and they appear to be in love, but my dad doesn’t seem to understand that. I certainly don’t intend to marry and bring children into the world.”
“That’s too bad.”
“You intend to marry? After what you’ve been through?”
“I don’t know. It depends. But I would like to have a child, to give my love to a child.”
“Just think before you do that. It’s a total commitment.”
“Yes, I know.”
“Tell me what you like to do for fun.”
“I…I—” Truthfully, she didn’t do much for fun. Lately there was only work. “Sometimes I read, watch television. I go to an occasional play if it sounds interesting, or the SMU guest series.”
“How about the movies?”
“No, I haven’t seen a movie in years. Most of them seem silly.”
“A little silly now and then doesn’t hurt anything.”
“I suppose you’re right. So you go to movies a lot?”
“Yeah. I get to hold hands in the movies.” He sent her a mock leer.
“You’re making fun of me, aren’t you?”
“Well, you did get a little bent out of shape about that.”
“How would it look if you were taking a woman out on a business luncheon and she insisted on holding your hand?”
“Hmm, you’re right, that wouldn’t be appropriate. But if it was you, I wouldn’t say no.”
The waiter delivered their meals, interrupting their conversation, which Diane felt was a good thing. She began eating, keeping her gaze on her plate.
“Is your food good?” he asked.
“Yes, of course, and yours?”
“Perfect, just like my dining companion.”
Her eyes shot up, to find him staring at her. “Are you flirting with me?” she demanded.
“Of course I am. Did you just now realize it? I must’ve lost my touch!”
“I don’t find that appropriate behavior at a business lunch.”
“I think it depends on whom I’m having lunch with. I never flirt with Mark.”
“Good.”
“But I’ll always flirt with you.”
“Why? Don’t you respect me?”
“Absolutely, but I also want to sleep with you.”
“You’re being ridiculous!”
“Did I shock you?”
“Yes. I’m not beautiful. You have all these beautiful women pursuing you. Why would you flirt with me?”
“I’ll admit, at first it was because you rejected me.”
She rolled her eyes. “I suppose it was the shock of that happening.”
He laughed. “Yeah. But then it was because you didn’t expect compliments or anything like that. You expected respect.”
“And that was so odd? Surely—”
“Most women I know would sell their soul for a rich man. In fact, they usually do. Those are the kind my father marries. I knew instinctively you wouldn’t do that.”
“That doesn’t change the way I look.”
“You think that’s a problem?”
“Of course. I’m not beautiful. I don’t stand out in a crowd.”
“You stand out to me. Since I’ve met you, you occupy my mind most of the time.”
She put down her fork and sat back in her chair. “I think you’ll get over it quickly.”
He gave her a crooked grin, one that touched her heart. “Maybe, but I don’t think so.”
She picked up her fork and continued eating. What could she say?
After several minutes of silence, he said, “Haven’t you thought about me? At least once or twice?”
She thought about not answering, but he’d been honest with her. “Yes, a time or two. But only because you’ve acted oddly.”
“Ah.”
She’d hurt his feelings. She knew it, but couldn’t help that. She knew she had no chance of a happy ending with someone like John. It would be useless to moon over him.
More time passed, then John spoke again. “If I asked you out to dinner or a movie or something, would you go with me?”
“John, even if I said yes, I don’t sleep around. It would only take once or twice going out and you’d be fed up with me. So what’s the point?”
“If that happens, then I’ll have only myself to blame. Okay? I’m not going to force myself on you. Either we get together because we both want to, or we don’t. Those are the rules I play by.”
“I suppose I could go out once, but it shouldn’t get back to the people at the bank. Do you agree to that?”
“Sure, I can see why that makes sense. I guess I should apologize about wanting to hold hands while we were in the bank. That was bad of me, but I just wanted to touch you so damn bad.”
Her gaze collided with his in surprise. “I—I’m not sure—”
“I apologize, Diane. I shouldn’t have said that. I’m always in control, I promise.”
HE WAS OUT OF CONTROL.
After
