didn’t know if this was what love felt like but he couldn’t imagine it got any better.
He’d gotten his stitches out; the bandage was off but his hand still hurt sometimes, like when he caught a fly ball. He wasn’t playing that well. He was hitting okay, catching worse. It frustrated him but graduation was nigh and he knew he wasn’t scholarship material based on athletics. He was getting a little scholarship help at UC for academics. But he liked baseball and wanted to play. “You’re going to have to give it time,” Dr. Culver said. “It might be slightly sore when stressed for a few months.”
“So much for baseball,” he grumbled.
“If you still have trouble in midsummer, we’ll contact a specialist. Since you only have moderate pain when you pressure the injury site, I don’t suspect any deeper problem. Why don’t you cushion the site with a bandage while you play ball, see if that helps.”
“I’ll try that,” he said.
But when he had Maia in his arms, his hand never bothered him. It felt particularly good when he had it full of the warm, sweet flesh of her breast. They did a lot of kissing, touching, bumping and grinding, then one night they unbuttoned each other’s jeans. He reached for hers, she reached for his and he thought he might die. All he wanted in life was that they put their hands down each other’s pants. They were parked at a turnout on a mountain road, steaming up the windows just as they steamed up each other.
“Okay, whoa now,” Maia said. “Let’s slow this down before we lose control.”
“Okay,” he said obediently. He put his arm around her shoulders, pulled her close and said, “Should we go to prom?”
She laughed softly. “I wondered about that. I wondered if you were ever going to ask me.”
“I’m just an average guy, Maia. I was putting it off, afraid you’d say no. I mean, you could go with anyone.”
“You’re so funny. Who else would I go with? Who else would ask me as long as we’re going together? Of course I’ll go with you! Why wouldn’t I?”
“You’re so wonderful.” He kissed her temple.
“I’m not quite ready for sex,” she said.
“That’s okay,” he said.
“Going to prom with you might not make me any more ready. Promise me you won’t expect sex if you take me to prom.”
“I promise. Sex. That’s your call.”
“But I bet you have a condom.”
A short laugh escaped him. “I will always have a condom. Know why? Because we’re not going to get in over our heads. We’re going to be safe and we’re going to be sure.”
“Well, I have something to tell you. I haven’t had sex with anyone. I’m not sure I even know what to do. But I know I’m not quite ready.”
He stroked her soft hair. “Maia, I haven’t, either. But I bet if we do eventually do it, it’ll be all right. No hurry. Your call, like I said.”
“But you’re ready?”
He was quiet for a moment. He sighed. He was such a hustler—not. It had only taken about six months to get to this conversation. “There’s no way I can say the right thing here.”
She giggled. “I know you want to. I want to, too. But you know what? I’d like to be sure we’re going to be together for a while. I want to be sure we both feel like we’re with the one we love. But don’t say you love me—it won’t get you sex.”
He laughed. Then he kissed her cheek. “Okay, I get it. I do think I love you, though.”
“Seriously?”
“What do I know? I’ve never been serious with a girl like this. I love every second with you. Everything about us together is good. When we’re making out or doing homework. Okay, that’s a lie. Making out is better than homework. There is one thing...”
“Yeah?”
“When you start to seriously consider sex, with me or with anyone, you need protection. Like the pill or something. And I think if it’s ever with anyone but me I might have to kill him, but don’t let that bother you. I’ll do it fast and as painlessly as possible and we don’t have to ever talk about it.”
She laughed. “You’d never kill a fly.”
“Hah! I’ve killed hundreds of flies!”
“I’m already on the pill,” she said quietly. She shrugged and didn’t look at him. “Terrible cramps. But that doesn’t mean I’m ready for sex with you. But I do feel like I love you, too. For all the same reasons.”
Finn really thought he might explode on the spot, but not only had his father lectured endlessly on this topic, his aunt Sid had talked with him at length about how to respect women. There was a lot of talk about consent. “Whew,” he said. “Okay, you just keep me posted. You should definitely be sure.”
After that conversation, spring seemed to literally blast its way onto the land—flowers, bunnies, elk calves and all.
Leigh moved everything off her desk, then put everything back and moved everything off her credenza. She checked her pockets and dumped the contents of her purse on her desk. She looked under her desk and in each drawer. Then she went to the front of the clinic where Eleanor and Gretchen worked. “Has anyone seen my cell phone?”
“Did you call it, listen for the ring?” Gretchen asked.
“It’s turned off. I swear I just had it.”
“You checked desk drawers, purse?”
“Yes. And I emptied my purse completely to be sure.”
“Could you have left it in your car?” Eleanor asked.
“No. I sat at my desk and talked to my aunt Helen this morning.”
“Trash?”
“I’ll look,” Leigh said, heading back to her office.
“I took out the trash,” Gretchen said.
Leigh and Eleanor both looked at her. She had a reputation for not doing the dirty work until asked. At close of business either Eleanor or Leigh usually handled the trash.
“Don’t look at me like that,” Gretchen said. “Not the medical waste. Just the paper and kitchen waste.”
Leigh sighed. “I’ll go get it.”
“Let me do that, Dr. Culver,” Eleanor said.
“No, it’s my phone. I wonder if I could’ve knocked it in the trash while I was cleaning off my desk this morning. I’ll be right back.” She took the stethoscope from around her neck and put it on the counter. Then she went out back to the Dumpster.
She could see the white trash bag that
