PERSONAL POWER (Complete 12 Volume Edition). William Walker Atkinson
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Comparatively very few individuals experience the full degree of this stage of consciousness. Many, of course, say “I AM I,” thereby distinguishing themselves from others—this, however, is merely the first stage of consciousness, not the sixth. Few proceed further in their realization of selfconsciousness. Many are unable to differentiate in consciousness between the “I AM I” and the physical body. Still fewer are those who are able to make the distinction between the “I AM I” and the “feeling states”; and still fewer are those who can realize the “I AM I” as transcending the “thinking states.” Very rare and far between, indeed, are those who are able to distinguish between the consciousness of the willstates, and the consciousness of the “I AM I.” The great masses of the race think of the “self” as an aggregate or composite of mind and body, feelings, emotions, thoughts, will activities, etc., and seldom, if ever, catch even a glimpse of the essential and ultimate Selfhood of the “I AM I” or Master Self—the Real Self.
But the great individuals of the race—those who “stand out” from the masses—will usually be found to have evolved into quite a full state of SelfConsciousness; and, accordingly, they will have experienced that sense of Personal Power that comes with this recognition of the “I AM I,” Master Self, Real Self. This illuminating experience, once it comes to the individual, leaves him changed and different: he is never again the same man. A new world is opened to him. A new and positive sense of the reality of his essential being has impressed itself upon him. It comes to many as an awakening from a troubled sleep, or dream state—the dawning realization that “I AM I,” in spite of the dream illusion. In this dawn of the realization of Ultimate SelfConsciousness, the individual “finds himself” at last.
An old English writer once said: “Whether we try to avoid it or not, we must face this reality some time—this reality of our own Egohood—that which makes us say ‘I,’ and in saying ‘I’ leads to the discovery of a new world.” A leading American psychologist has said: “SelfConsciousness is a growth. Many persons never have more than a misty idea of such a mental attitude. They always take themselves for granted, and never turn the gaze inward.”
The dawn of SelfConsciousness—the awakening from the dream of Simple Consciousness—in the individual, is accompanied by a new awareness and consciousness of reality and actual existence; in fact, so strong often becomes this new consciousness of the certainty of real and actual existence, that compared with it all other forms of conscious existence fade into comparative insignificance. This consciousness, once firmly established, serves as a Tower of Strength for the individual, in which he may take refuge, and then defy the adverse conditions of the external world of thoughts and things.
The process of selfanalysis, according to which you have proceeded to abstract, in turn, the consciousness of the physical body, the emotionalstates, the thoughtstates, and the willstates, respectively, has now brought you to the point where you have nothing else left for you to analyze, for the purpose of possible abstraction, except the selfconsciousness of the existence of the “I AM I” or Master Self—the Real Self. But when you undertake to subject that ultimate element of Selfhood to such process, you discover that further analysis, abstraction, simplification and reduction is impossible—you have reached something Ultimate which defies further analysis or simplification, or separation into parts, elements, or factors. It is the Irreducible Element—the Insoluble Residuum—of Selfhood: it is Egohood itself, in its final essence and principle.
You have discovered that this “I AM I” or Master Self, is not subject to changes, alteration or modification. It is not subject to Becoming, for it is Pure Being, always identical with itself, always constant, ever the same. It does not flow, nor is it in a state of flux. It is never transformed, nor is it transmuted. It does not change form, for it has no form. It does not manifest degrees, for it is absolute in its nature and being. It does not take on aspects, modes, or conditions of appearance. It is always itself, its whole self, and nothing but itself. In this respect it is seen to be entirely different from any of its instruments or machinery, mental or physical. It is not an instrument, nor a part of the machinery—it is That which owns and uses the instruments and the machinery of mental and physical expression and manifestation.
Moreover, your experiments will show you conclusively that you cannot set aside or abstract this “I AM I” or Master Self for the purpose of observation or experiment, as you have been able to do with the physical and mental instruments or machinery which belong to it. You can never make of it an object to be examined or observed by your subjective observer. Try the experiment! You will then find that if you place the “I AM I” at the objective end of your microscope of attention, there will be no subjective “I AM I” left to conduct the examination from the other end of the instrument. Likewise, if you place the “I AM I” at the subjective or observing—end of the instrument, then there will be no objective “I AM I” at the other end, ready to be observed.
Just as the eye sees all outside of itself, but can never see itself, so the “I AM I” may observe and examine everything outside of its essential self, but can never observe and examine its essential self. Here, you find a Something or Somewhat in which subject and object are inseparably joined and combined. Here, indeed, you find the hypothetical “stick with only one end” of the old metaphysicians. Here you find something which is always “subjective,” and never “objective”—something which is all “inside,” without any “outside” aspect or part.
Again, if you attempt to set it aside, as you did its instruments and machinery, mental and physical, you will find that you have nothing at all left of Selfhood—nothing to still assert “I AM I.” You cannot even think it out of existence, nor imagine it out of being, try as you will If you try to think of a world without this “I AM I” existent in it, and then proceed to examine this “I” less world, you will find that it is the “I AM I” itself conducting the examination. If you seek to get rid of it by some metaphysical casuistry or subtle sophistry, you will eventually discover that the “I AM I” is still there, “hidden behind some kindly metaphysical cloud, peering out cautiously, curious to observe how the world is getting along without it.” Throw the “I AM I” out of the door of your consciousness, and it will come in through the window; lock the windows and doors against it, and it will descend through the chimney—it will gain access, somehow, someway.
Even though in imagination you may picture yourself as occupying many different bodies, successively, each with its own emotional, thought, and will character, yet you will always find that it is the same identical “I AM I” playing the part of occupant. Or, though you may imagine yourself in the role of the King of England, the Archbishop of Canterbury, or the President of the United States, yet you always find YOURSELF playing these several parts—at the last, you will realize that YOU, the “same old I,” are the real actor playing the several parts, under the various masks and wearing different costumes. You may change characters, garbs, and roles—but you never can change “I’s”. You are YOU, and never can be not-YOU.
The unfoldment of Ultimate Self-Consciousness—Conscious Egohood—will bring to you the realization that you are a focal centre of Power in the cosmos—a focal centre of Real Power and Real Being. You will gradually realize that YOU are a Centre in the Cosmos, just as the sun is a centre with multitudes of objects whirling around it, or flowing past it.
The occult teachers of ancient days were wont to remind each of their students that he, himself, was “a Centre in the Cosmos; for, in the Cosmos, the circumference is nowhere (because the Cosmos is infinite), and, consequently, the centre is everywhere.” Therefore, the student was introduced to himself,