gentleman now,” said Laura. Senator Dilworthy retired to his study.
Laura welcomed Mr. Trollop, a grave, carefully dressed and very respectable looking man, with a bald head, standing collar and old fashioned watch seals.
“Promptness is a virtue, Mr. Trollop, and I perceive that you have it. You are always prompt with me.”
“I always meet my engagements, of every kind, Miss Hawkins.”
“It is a quality which is rarer in the world than it has been, I believe. I wished to see you on business, Mr. Trollop.”
“I judged so. What can I do for you?”
“You know my bill — the Knobs University bill?”
“Ah, I believe it is your bill. I had forgotten. Yes, I know the bill.”
“Well, would you mind telling me your opinion of it?”
“Indeed, since you seem to ask it without reserve, I am obliged to say that I do not regard it favorably. I have not seen the bill itself, but from what I can hear, it — it — well, it has a bad look about it. It — ”
“Speak it out — never fear.”
“Well, it — they say it contemplates a fraud upon the government.”
“Well?” said Laura tranquilly.
“Well! I say ‘Well?’ too.”
“Well, suppose it were a fraud — which I feel able to deny — would it be the first one?”
“You take a body’s breath away! Would you — did you wish me to vote for it? Was that what you wanted to see me about?”
“Your instinct is correct. I did want you — I do want you to vote for it.”
“Vote for a fr — for a measure which is generally believed to be at least questionable? I am afraid we cannot come to an understanding, Miss Hawkins.”
“No, I am afraid not — if you have resumed your principles, Mr. Trollop.”
“Did you send for me merely to insult me? It is time for me to take my leave, Miss Hawkins.”
“No — wait a moment. Don’t be offended at a trifle. Do not be offish and unsociable. The Steamship Subsidy bill was a fraud on the government. You voted for it, Mr. Trollop, though you always opposed the measure until after you had an interview one evening with a certain Mrs. McCarter at her house. She was my agent. She was acting for me. Ah, that is right — sit down again. You can be sociable, easily enough if you have a mind to. Well? I am waiting. Have you nothing to say?”
“Miss Hawkins, I voted for that bill because when I came to examine into it — ”
“Ah yes. When you came to examine into it. Well, I only want you to examine into my bill. Mr. Trollop, you would not sell your vote on that subsidy bill — which was perfectly right — but you accepted of some of the stock, with the understanding that it was to stand in your brother-in-law’s name.”
“There is no pr — I mean, this is, utterly groundless, Miss Hawkins.” But the gentleman seemed somewhat uneasy, nevertheless.
“Well, not entirely so, perhaps. I and a person whom we will call Miss Blank (never mind the real name,) were in a closet at your elbow all the while.”
Mr. Trollop winced — then he said with dignity:
“Miss Hawkins is it possible that you were capable of such a thing as that?”
“It was bad; I confess that. It was bad. Almost as bad as selling one’s vote for — but I forget; you did not sell your vote — you only accepted a little trifle, a small token of esteem, for your brother-in-law. Oh, let us come out and be frank with each other: I know you, Mr. Trollop. I have met you on business three or four times; true, I never offered to corrupt your principles — never hinted such a thing; but always when I had finished sounding you, I manipulated you through an agent. Let us be frank. Wear this comely disguise of virtue before the public — it will count there; but here it is out of place. My dear sir, by and by there is going to be an investigation into that National Internal Improvement Directors’ Relief Measure of a few years ago, and you know very well that you will be a crippled man, as likely as not, when it is completed.”
“It cannot be shown that a man is a knave merely for owning that stock. I am not distressed about the National Improvement Relief Measure.”
“Oh indeed I am not trying to distress you. I only wished to make good my assertion that I knew you. Several of you gentlemen bought of that stack (without paying a penny down) received dividends from it, (think of the happy idea of receiving dividends, and very large ones, too, from stock one hasn’t paid for!) and all the while your names never appeared in the transaction; if ever you took the stock at all, you took it in other people’s names. Now you see, you had to know one of two things; namely, you either knew that the idea of all this preposterous generosity was to bribe you into future legislative friendship, or you didn’t know it. That is to say, you had to be either a knave or a — well, a fool — there was no middle ground. You are not a fool, Mr. Trollop.”
“Miss Hawking you flatter me. But seriously, you do not forget that some of the best and purest men in Congress took that stock in that way?”
“Did Senator Blank?”
“Well, no — I believe not.”
“Of course you believe not. Do you suppose he was ever approached, on the subject?”
“Perhaps not.”
“If you had approached him, for instance, fortified with the fact that some of the best men in Congress, and the purest, etc., etc.; what would have been the result?”
“Well, what WOULD have been the result?”
“He would have shown you the door! For Mr. Blank is neither a knave nor a fool. There are other men in the Senate and the House whom no one would have been hardy enough to approach with that Relief Stock in that peculiarly generous way, but they are not of the class that you regard as the best and purest. No, I say I know you Mr. Trollop. That is to say, one may suggest a thing to Mr. Trollop which it would not do to suggest to Mr. Blank. Mr. Trollop, you are pledged to support the Indigent Congressmen’s Retroactive Appropriation which is to come up, either in this or the next session. You do not deny that, even in public. The man that will vote for that bill will break the eighth commandment in any other way, sir!”
“But he will not vote for your corrupt measure, nevertheless, madam!” exclaimed Mr. Trollop, rising from his seat in a passion.
“Ah, but he will. Sit down again, and let me explain why. Oh, come, don’t behave so. It is very unpleasant. Now be good, and you shall have the missing page of your great speech. Here it is!” — and she displayed a sheet of manuscript.
Mr. Trollop turned immediately back from the threshold. It might have been gladness that flashed into his face; it might have been something else; but at any rate there was much astonishment mixed with it.
“Good!
