I was left with something that shows that ‘Toto’ Lorenzo was a genius, an incredible guy. When we played against Boca at La Bombonera, Diego Umaña, from our team, a specialist in corner kicks, did not make any of them reach the penalty box. When the first half was over, I asked him: ‘Diego, what’s wrong with you? Why aren’t you sending the corner kicks to the penalty box?’ ‘Mister,’ he answered, ‘there’s a dog that will not let me kick.’ ‘A police dog?’ I inquired. ‘Yes. Every time I went to the corner flag, I had him on top, he stuck to me. He wanted to eat my leg! So I couldn’t kick well,’ he said. A few days later, when I watched the video replay of that game very carefully, I noticed that Umaña had not lied: Every time we had a corner kick in our favor, the policeman who controlled the dog would let go a bit of rope. There was no place to take a run to the ball! Above all, the dog was very fierce, he barked and threatened to bite poor Umaña. Then, I understood why Diego, with good sense, would have chosen to throw bad corner kicks before leaving the field with one leg less. The ‘Toto’ was very crafty. A genius!”
A STRANGE CHOICE
Shortly before the start of the 1906 first division championship in Argentina, the legendary goalkeeper José Laforia went to Alumni Athletic Club, leaving his former squad, Barracas Athletic Club, without a substitute starter. (Both clubs are now defunct in the soccer universe.) Faced with this emergency situation, Barracas, who did not have another goalkeeper, was forced to try different field players at the goal, but since none of them excelled in that role, the search continued for a new candidate continued daily.
On August 26 of that year, the men from Barracas had to travel to the town of Campana in Buenos Aires—which is located about 32 miles (60 km) north of the City of Buenos Aires—to face the Reformer Athletic Club, a modest group made up of employees from a refrigerator factory. That cold morning, only eight players showed up at the Retiro train station to make the trip to the rival’s field. On the way to Campana, the players decided on a revolutionary strategy to counteract the numerical disadvantage: They entrusted the difficult task of guarding the goal to Winston Coe, one of the founding partners of the team, who usually served as defender on the right. But their strategy did not serve them well against the Reformer squad, who won by a resounding victory of 11-0 against the disadvantaged team from Buenos Aires. However, the chronicles of the time—including the newspaper La Nación—praised the work of Coe, who was mainly responsible for Barracas not suffering an even more humiliating rout despite one important physical disadvantage…Coe did not have a left arm!
THE MATCH WITH NO OPPONENT
Hampden Park was overflowing. Newspapers from Glasgow assure us that on April 19, 1879, a day in which the final match of the Scottish Cup between Rangers FC (local institution that had already begun to have a popular fan base though they still had not obtained a title) and Vale of Leven Football & Athletic Club (squad from the city of Alexandria) was played, there was a “never before seen” crowd “inside and outside the stadium.”
The 9,000 seats were sold out, and the match had to be delayed for half an hour while the police fought hard to restore order to the spectators in the stands as well as the almost 3,000 fans that were left out on the street. The game began, and the Rangers were very efficient, with a fast goal scored by Willie Struthers. The striker was not finished, though, and, shortly after, scored again against the rival goalkeeper, Robert Parlane, with a powerful shot. But, as goals did not yet have nets at this time, the ball bounced off a spectator in the grandstand and, as quickly as it came out, returned to the field. The play surprised the referee, who did not see how the ball crossed the finish line. He ordered the play to continue, despite protests from the Rangers.
In the second half, Vale of Leven took advantage of a mistake by rival goalkeeper George Gillespie to equalize the score, which remained tied until the end. The Rangers’ players and fans were outraged. Their officials protested the result and offered the testimony of the person who had been struck by the uncounted Struthers’ goal—a professor of surgery at the University of Glasgow, “a gentleman whose word no Vale fan could doubt.” Despite the claim, the Scottish Association maintained the result and ordered the final match to be played again a week later on the same stage. However, on April 26, only one team showed up on the lawn of Hampden Park: Vale of Leven. The Rangers missed the appointment in retaliation against the Scottish Association’s decision
At the appointed time, and in the absence of the “blue” players, the referee gave the order and started a ridiculous match of Vale against…nobody! John McDougall, the captain, moved forward and played the ball with James Baird and Peter McGregor until he buried it in the empty goal. The ref—perhaps embarrassed by the unnecessary show—ended the charade, and Alexandria’s team lifted the cup for the second time. In the insert added to the base of the trophy, where all the champions are listed, it was written: “Vale of Leven, Rangers did not appear.”
FELL FROM THE SKY
A soccer match is an excellent target for advertising campaigns, both commercial and political. The massive competition and the vast variety of spectators make the stadium an important focus for marketing. This was understood perfectly by an intrepid promoter, who, on March 21, 1948, after boarding a plane, flew over the Gemeentelijk Parkstadion where the local team, Koninklijke Boom FC, and Beerschot Antwerpen Club were playing for the first division tournament of Belgium. The pilot, who had loaded the device with advertising flyers, descended, took a package, and threw it through the window to one of the bleachers. The pages dispersed, forming a colorful cloud that caught the attention of the fans, who stretched to grab one of the color papers raining down on them. A major success!
Encouraged by the excellent reception of his strategy, the skilled pilot pointed the nose of his aircraft to the other side of the stadium to repeat the maneuver. But he made an error, and this time, the package did not open and instead fell directly on the head of the referee. In that same moment, Boom FC scored a goal! While the pilot fled, aware that he had made a big mistake, the players and the line judges attended to the referee, who recovered from the knock, luckily, without any major consequences. The referee validated the goal at the request of his collaborators, since he had not seen it, and the game continued as normal. The host club finally lost by 3 to 4, a defeat that seemed to fall straight from the sky.
THE DOG THAT SCORED A GOAL
It is hard to believe this story, although several prestigious English newspapers, such as The Independent, swear it is true. In November 1985, the Knave of Clubs FC and Newcastle Town FC faced each other in Monks Neil Park for the Staffordshire Sunday Cup. With the score an unfavorable 0-2, one of Knave of Clubs’ defenders sent a ball down the opposite field in attempt to pass to one of his teammates in white. The ball did not reach any of the players, however, because, at that moment, a naughty dog had strolled on to the field. The dog ran the ball and, with a nice pirouette, headed it inside the net past a dumbfounded goalkeeper. Then the daring dog fled the field as fast as he could, accompanied by the laughter of the 22 players, the referees, and a handful of spectators.
The laughter did not last long for some of the players, though, because the referee, clearly ignorant of the rules, declared the goal valid. According to the regulations, “in the event that an additional ball, object or animal enters the field of play during the game, the referee shall interrupt the game only if said ball, object or animal interferes in the game.” Of little use were the protests of the Newcastle Town’s players, especially the goalie, who insisted on telling the ref that he had let the animal do as he wished because such action was not explicit in the law. “Exactly,” the referee said, “in
