larger annoyances throughout their lifetime, which they survived with limited hurt, and which they were eventually able to put behind them and go on to live peaceful lives. They will lightly tell you to do the same.
“Then again, the matter is often passed off as ‘personality clash’- two opposing characters who cannot come to terms. That explanation is lacking in that it is the belittler, one person, who causes the trouble. And again, some envious belittlers themselves when confronted about the abuse they inflict on others, while trivializing the whole matter in doing so, will pass it off as just ‘mean spirited.’ In their pride they cannot bear to admit they are envious of someone else, because that would be an admission that the someone else is gifted better than they in some ways. Rather than admit to that they shrug it off lightly as just a little mean spirited, as though there wasn’t much to it, and the recipient of it is too sensitive. In actuality, what is passed off as a little mean spirited is often brutal, and career, health and life damaging.
“The fact is, to paraphrase Barclay, we of our type have to put up with more envy in an hour than do some people in a lifetime. Personally, I have never known a time in my adult life when I wasn’t dodging a person or persons who were trying to bring me down, with often a substantial number of people getting a kick out of them doing so. Many others in their naïveté and unawareness just don’t even see what is going on. It is a way of life for persons like you and I. It becomes a continuous and heavy burden to carry, particularly in our younger years. And like our friend and colleague Alban has illustrated since this group began, we sometimes snap under the cruel and oppressive load and are then labeled weaklings. This in turn plays into the hands of the belittlers and puts us down further. For me personally, the friendship of nice people who understand, even though often silently, helps tremendously to make the burden of the almost constant behavior of belittlers bearable and possible to cope with.
“But,” said Collin, “we can discuss all that further later on if you wish. Now I wish to quote another scholar, Lance Webb and his book on the traditional sins of the church and of Christian theology. Webb sees envy as a by-product of pride, or what I prefer to tag misplaced or undisciplined pride.
‘Each of the other six sins in a very definite way is a child of pride. Envy is self-love unable to permit anyone to excel or rise above one’s own superiority, with resulting hate, jealousy, intolerance, prejudice, slander, gossip, and use of sarcasm or more violent means of leveling others to one’s own height.’ (Lance Webb: CONQUERING THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS. Page 41. Abingdon Press, 1955).
“This is a good definition,” remarked Collin, “except that envious belittlers not only want to level us to their own height, they want to level us below their own height. They are often power and control people as well. It is not power and control for the sake and furtherance of the church, but rather an egotistical desire to satisfy something lacking in their own self-centered mind-set. They don’t usually come across to us as people of power, but their sought after control over matters gives them a sense of being up there with the better natured, truly influential people. Hence I feel right in referring to them as power and control freaks. When envy is present with this desire for power it makes them feel a need to feel superior to others around them, especially to fine, smart people. They cannot look up to us. They cannot be on the same level with us. They can only look down. They want to be on top. They feel they can only do so by putting down those whom they perceive to be above them. Their sick and twisted motto is, ‘if I can’t get them down, then I can’t be up.’ They have to put us below themselves so they can look down on us. They do this by some or all the means and more listed by Webb-‘hate, jealousy, intolerance, prejudice, slander, gossip, and use of sarcasm or more violent means.’ The devious deeds by which they put these weapons to work will be further illustrated in my presentation. “Webb reiterates and expands on his definition of envy:
‘It includes those sins such as hate, intolerance, jealousy and prejudice, which are the result of my self-love seeking to keep an exalted place among my fellows and therefore unable to bear excellence or superiority on the part of others. The sin of envy also is seen to include the sins which result from my attempt to lower those who have risen above me to my own level; namely, slander, gossip, and sarcasm - the tools I use to get even.’ (Lance Webb: CONQUERING THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS. P.58 Abingdon Press 1955.)
“I wish to add though,” said Collin, “that the belittlers are often much more subtle than Webb states. They are crafty enough to avoid open slander, gossip and sarcasm. They often play the psychological mind-game and imply it. Some belittlers will even be outwardly nice to you while attempting through deception to lead you to destruction. Beware of the person who, while seeming to be nice to you outwardly- nice smiles, cheerful greetings, and all that-is attempting to lead you in questionable directions, perhaps by innuendo only. They are expert con artists at times. These are mind- games belittlers play-childish, to be sure, on their part-but it becomes a destructive weapon to victims who may not have sufficient awareness of it to discern what is happening to them.
“They mutilate the character and sometimes the mental health of their victims by derogatory hint and innuendo, or even by glance or other silent expression, all of which can be craftily covered when necessary, since they have stated nothing openly. If what they are doing is ever held up to them they can readily cover up and say they never said a word. Sometimes they imply that that person is never satisfied with what I try to do for him. I was just trying to be a friend. If they are openly accused of trickery, they can easily say, ‘you took it all wrong,’ or, ‘you are imagining things,’ or worse still, ‘you are nuts -paranoid.’
“Furthermore, a belittler is never bothered by others suspecting him of this devious trickery. He thinks it is the smart way to be. To honest, open people it is deceitful and repulsive. But the belittler, as long as he is able to, in his own mind, rationalize and justify himself, he feels his constant ego trip, and consequently his hollow, undisciplined pride, are intact.”
Collin commented further, “Webb has given us reasons why belittlers treat us the way they do; out of envy they have to whittle us down. Also, you can see why, the better the person is in the eyes of the envious ones, the more that person has to put up with the ravages of their envy.”
Continuing, Collin said, “one more very worthy point of Webbs is, I believe, relevant to this story and should be taken note of. Webb states:
‘Intellectual pride is the most difficult of all pride to displace.’ (Lance Webb. CONQUERING THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS, page 48, Abingdon Press 1955).
“I am of the opinion,” said Collin, “that this intellectual pride to which Webb refers is most prevalent in academic circles; among people whose chief pride and ego stems from the fact that they have a measure of attainment in the academic sphere. I will therefore refer to it as academic pride. I would emphasize first and foremost, and very readily that academically is not the only way to be an exceptional person, although many academics with a false sense of pride would have you think so. The world has known many exceptional people who either never had an opportunity, or, didn’t have much interest in pursuing academics to its fullest. This is not to downplay the value of education. I think you will perceive for yourself as I continue, that I realize fully the place of quality education in life.
“Having said that, let me say, the truly educated person is humbled by genuine academic attainment, realizing how much he doesn’t yet know and how much more there is to discover. The proud belittler has to have a feeling of superiority to go with his academic attainments, and often he has to put less educated people, or even more highly educated well charactered people, beneath him in order to, in his own mind, retain his sense of superiority.
“An amusing anecdote that has been passed around for years is ‘a person, through his education and position in life, either grows or swells, one or the other.’ The truly educated person, with his
