that is too faddish is not included in this book, because it comes and goes too quickly. If you use old slang, the reaction of your Japanese date will likely be, “He thinks he’s being cool but nobody says that anymore. Hah, hah!” So we’ve avoided hot slang—if it’s out of date people will think that you’re funny or square. But feel free to use what you pick up on the street.
VARIATIONS
The terms “boy” and “girl” are used throughout the book, but we’re definitely referring to the post-puberty phase here. To eliminate the embarrassing problem of boys using girls’ words or vice versa, we’ve indicated words suitable for use by girls and boys with the symbols ♀ and ♂ respectively. Words and phrases not marked can be used by both sexes, and (b g) means a boy should use it when talking to a girl. For example:
Don’t be upset.
Make me warm.
You look beautiful.
But before you go thinking that boys’ and girls’ speech patterns are absolutely divided, stop a minute. Don’t be shocked if you hear a girl using a quite masculine phrase (or vice versa). The gender gap in Japanese speech is narrowing, especially among young people, and there’s nothing wrong with “borrowing” for impact or emphasis. We’ve made the distinction as a general guide to usage.
One thing you’ll notice as you speak with the Japanese (especially if you move around) is that people’s speech patterns vary wildly. We’re not just talking about slang here, there are also big differences between regions and social groups. It’s impossible for us to include all the variations (more on the regional ones later) of the phrases in this book, so we’ve gone with a standard Japanese (hyōjungo
Adaptation is really important—the phrases here might seem too harsh to some ears and too soft to others. Take your cues from the speech and reactions of people around you. If they warm up to the way you’re talking, great, otherwise think about the way they’re taking it and adjust. If all else fails, ask— foreigners aren’t expected to know everything!
JAPANESE–ENGLISH–JAPANESE
You’ll have seen above that we’ve written Japanese phrases in two ways—in Rōmaji (
When using katakana, life gets a bit tricky when you hit the limitations of the Japanese language. It has only one final consonant “n,” so when the Japanese pronounce English words with other consonant endings, they have to tack on a vowel, usually a “u.” “Game” becomes g ēmu
There are few sounds that the Japanese can pronounce, so they’ve created new ways of writing them. A “we” (as in “web”) is written
The Japanese enjoy scattering English words in their speech and you should do the same. With a little practice, it’s easy to get the hang of how to “katakana-ize” an English word, that is, to pronounce it the way a Japanese would, strange as it might seem at first. As a foreigner, you’d be expected to use katakana words—so don’t hold back!
As a reference point, here’s a chart of the 45 kana in each alphabet, with the hiragana listed first under each sound. There are various ways of writing some kana in Rōmaji (e.g. tu or tsu)—we’ve gone with those closest to the sound.
There are a few more variations to watch out for. Notables are the use of ha as the subject particle, in which case it’s read wa (such as watashi-wa
BEING CHOOSY
There are plenty of phrases for which the Japanese have alternatives, as in any language. We’ve listed the phrases in a rough order from least to most casual, also getting more vulgar as they become more casual. If what you’re saying doesn’t seem to fit the mood, again, adapt to the speech of the people around you!
In the book, we’ve included the Japanese words for “me” and “you” in many phrases. In practice, they are often left out, unless particular clarification is needed, but until you can instinctively understand who is being referred to, it’s best to use them. If you do, there are a range of words available, not just the gender-neutral watashi
For girls, there’s atashi
