Julius Caesar: The 30-Minute Shakespeare. William Shakespeare
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NARRATOR
The dangerous day has arrived. Fearing for his safety, Caesar’s wife, Calpurnia, urges him to stay home. But does he listen? No. (pauses) Typical man.
Exit NARRATOR stage left.
Enter CHORUS from stage right and stage left, coming to center stage.
CALPURNIA (from offstage, yelling)
Murder! Caesar!
STAGE LEFT CHORUS make sounds of thunder; STAGE RIGHT CHORUS make sounds of rain.
Enter CAESAR, dressed in his nightgown, from stage right.
STAGE RIGHT CHORUS (shouting)
Caesar!
STAGE LEFT CHORUS (shouting)
Murder!
CAESAR
Nor heaven nor earth have been at peace tonight:
Thrice hath Calpurnia in her sleep cried out,
‘Help, ho! They murder Caesar!’
Enter CALPURNIA from stage right.
CALPURNIA (approaching CAESAR)
What mean you, Caesar? Think you to walk forth?
You shall not stir out of your house today.
CAESAR
Caesar shall forth: the things that threaten’d me
Ne’er look’d but on my back; when they shall see
The face of Caesar, they are vanished.
CALPURNIA
Caesar, I never stood on ceremonies,
Yet now they fright me.
A lioness hath whelped in the streets;
CHORUS, in unison, shape hands into claws, bringing them to their bellies as if giving birth. They then lift their arms out, up, and over their heads from the centers of their bodies.
And graves have yawn’d, and yielded up their dead;
CHORUS stretch arms and hands toward the ground and then open their mouths and stretch arms upward.
Horses did neigh,
CHORUS mime holding reins, each member raising one foot.
and dying men did groan,
CHORUS clutch themselves tightly.
And ghosts did shriek and squeal about the streets,
CHORUS put hands around mouth and scream out loud.
CALPURNIA, startled, reacts physically to CHORUS’S scream.
And I do fear them.
CAESAR
What can be avoided
Whose end is purposed by the mighty gods?
Yet Caesar shall go forth; for these predictions
Are to the world in general as to Caesar.
CALPURNIA
When beggars die, there are no comets seen;
CHORUS mime begging, turning palms upward.
The heavens themselves blaze forth the death of princes.
CHORUS raise arms up, wiggling their fingers to indicate stars.
CAESAR
Cowards die many times before their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once.
CALPURNIA
Alas, my lord,
Your wisdom is consumed in confidence.
Do not go forth today: call it my fear
That keeps you in the house, and not your own.
Let me, upon my knee, prevail in this.
Enter DECIUS BRUTUS from stage right.
DECIUS BRUTUS
Caesar, all hail! Good morrow, worthy Caesar:
I come to fetch you to the senate-house.
CAESAR
Decius, go tell them Caesar will not come.
DECIUS BRUTUS
Most mighty Caesar, let me know some cause.
CAESAR
The cause is in my will: I will not come;
That is enough to satisfy the senate.
But for your private satisfaction,
Calpurnia here, my wife, stays me at home:
She dreamt tonight she saw my statue,
STAGE LEFT and STAGE RIGHT CHORUS create identical tableaux of a citizen washing his hands in a statue fountain. (See Performance Notes.)
Which, like a fountain with a hundred spouts,
Did run pure blood: and many lusty Romans
Came smiling, and did bathe their hands in it.
DECIUS BRUTUS
Your statue spouting blood in many pipes,
Signifies that from you great Rome shall suck
Reviving blood. The senate have concluded
To give this day a crown to mighty Caesar.
If Caesar hide himself, shall they not whisper
‘Lo, Caesar is afraid’?
CAESAR