be taken away from her.’” (Luke 10:38–42)
One of the most fun things for outside parties was my cooler. I had a cooler on
a stand. I always had a sign on it saying, “Aunt Nicki’s Cooler.” I had small sodas,
juice and water bottles on ice. The kids all knew that they could each take a
special drink from “Aunt Nicki’s Cooler.” It warmed my heart when they’d run
up to me and politely ask if they could have a drink. Those kids have grown
bigger now but they will always be dear to my heart. We had inside events there
too and even built on an addition room to be able to have a larger room for
people to hang out. It was 28 by 28 feet with shelves on one side, a fireplace
on one end and surrounded by windows and French doors to the pool. It was a
great place to host events. I admit I loved sharing my yard the most because I
love being outside.
Sometimes we can do simple things for others. When our son, Nathan, was in high
school he wanted to invite a few friends over to swim on the last day of school. A
small group of about five of his friends came over. I quickly started grabbing things
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from my pantry. I dumped crackers into bowls, made popcorn, and found some
random cans of soda. I will never forget that one of the neighbor boys came inside,
saw these few snacks, and said, “You did all this for us?” Wow. It was such an easy
thing to do, but it’s also so easy to just say you don’t want to deal with it. I’m so
glad I just said yes. Little things make all the difference!
There are seasons to life, and becoming empty nesters brought changes to our
home. Three years ago, we decided to downsize since the kids were all grown
and we wanted to have a smaller yard. I did not embrace the idea at first, but
I was ready for the next adventure. For the past three years, we have lived in
the historical district in a home that was built in 1907. Being people who don’t
generally hire out work, we began the task of painting all the interior and redoing
several rooms. When we decided to remodel our master bath, it was quite the
project. I am so proud of my husband, Craig, and all his hard work. He did almost
all the work to renovate the bathroom from electrical to sheet rock to plumbing
and paint. My son-in-law, Shane, helped with demo and sheetrock. Nathan helped
with maneuvering the tub and vanity through the doors. The remodel took about
four months. Craig had gotten deals on several things online, so we had a vanity,
a bathtub, plumbing fixtures, and lighting all in boxes in our living room. We host
a small group Bible study at our home each week, and we knew we would not
cancel because of this enormous pile of construction supplies, equipment, debris,
and dust. No one cared. We enjoy our time together too much to let that bother
any of us. Hospitality makes the difference—nobody complains when they’re
having fun and being blessed.
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However, to be completely honest, it is true that a couple hours before Bible
study, I usually run around and touch up the house, get out dishes for dinner,
figure out beverages, and get things set up. Our dog, Ginger, knows the drill.
She knows people are coming over, and she waits by the door because mommy
is acting like people are coming. One time my friend, Lyn, came about thirty
minutes early. She asked what she could do to help, and I said I was doing OK, but
I was sweaty and running around. Then she said in her witty way, trying to calm
me down and help me regain my perspective, “You know, I have a friend writing
a book called
It’s Not About the Pie
.” She loved me enough to get my attention
with that bit of humorous sarcasm, and I got the message. Here I was stressing
while writing a book that tells others not to stress. I do race around when people
come, and have even been known to paint a mural before a gathering—yes, it’s
true. I think it’s that “art thing.” I have painted a scene on a wall as part of my
decorating, sometimes hours before people have come over. I think we all want to
be prepared when people are coming over. There is nothing wrong with that; it is
a good thing. However, we must think about the purpose of hospitality, which is
not perfection.
My college friend, Re, had this to say about her house and “perfection”:
I have piles of stuff: piles of papers, magazines, laundry, dishes, mail,
newspapers, random boxes. With three children, I had piles of backpacks,
toys, and school papers. You may have some of the same piles as I do, or
they may vary. That’s OK. Don’t let the stacks of stuff in your house keep
you from inviting people in. I used to always apologize for the messiness
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of my house to my friend Joanne
