Hidden under a pile of thoughts accusing him of being powerless, unworthy, forsaken, and condemned lay a dark wish for God to just take him home. Though carrying this burden, Payne had learned to just keep moving. He managed to pray throughout the rest of the day at church, and especially as he drove home for dinner.
He had already called home to inform Ashley and the kids that they were going to have a “family powwow” that night. So, after dinner, while the kids finished up their homework, Payne invited his wife into their bedroom to have a meeting before the meeting. Behind closed doors, he cautiously broached the subject. “Honey, you more than anyone know that I have been dissatisfied. I’ve shared about how tired I am of the constant shifting, the endless redefining of success. I’m tired of being inadequate to navigate through the ministry maze.”
“Are you giving up?” asked Ashley, the wrinkles between her eyes pronounced with worry.
“No, not at all. In fact, I feel like I’m finally in the game. That low-grade fear of being lost and left on the outside is gone. I feel ready, even ambitious to be in on what God is up to.” Payne gazed into his wife’s eyes, and said, “What I’m about to tell you is confidential. Only those involved are to know. But, there will come a day soon when everybody will know.”
“Okay, I’m listening,” said Ashley as she leaned back onto the bed, using her hands as support.
But, as was often the case when they were in the bedroom, Doug, their son, knocked on their door at the most inopportune time.
“Are we going to have the meeting now?” yelled Doug from the other side of the door. It only took that one time of not knocking before entering for him to be well trained to never do that again.
“In a minute, son. Do us a favor; find your sister and we will meet you in the living room.” Payne looked at his wife and said, “We really do have terrific kids.” He paused, then continued with a smile, “You know what they say: fruit doesn’t fall far from the tree.”
“And neither do the nuts!” grinned Ashley, but not just for her witty comeback. Her countenance conveyed a confidence in her husband.
As Payne watched his wife walk out into the hallway, he wondered for the umpteenth time that day if he was indeed nuts to even consider George’s proposal. He knew that, whichever way he turned, fruit would fall. He hoped for good, not forbidden, fruit as he followed Ashley out of the bedroom.
The four met in the living room. Bundt, their chocolate Labrador, laid down next to Anne on the couch with his head resting on her lap—almost as if he sensed what was about to be shared and that she would need comfort.
Payne forewarned, “I want to begin our family powwow by saying that this will not be like any other powwow.”
“Does this mean it will be interesting and short?” quipped Doug.
“I guarantee it will be interesting!” How short the meeting will be was not just a good question, it was the question. Just how much should be shared? How much should be revealed? Once something was said, it could never be taken back. It would forever change and shape the family trust.
“What I’m about to tell you is confidential. And what I’m about to tell you will, I’m sure, confuse and trouble you. It may even offend you. However, I believe, once you understand and hear me out, it will revive you, or at least intrigue you.”
“Dad, just tell us. We can take it.” Anne said this in hopes of moving the meeting along. She wanted to return to her original plan for the evening: study for the college admission exam that she was taking on Saturday.
“Actually, Anne, what I’m about to share affects you the most.” With this said, and with a deep breath, Payne invited his family to join him as he prayed. They all instinctively bowed their heads. Even Bundt closed his eyes.
“Father, You who loves us with an everlasting love, help us now to wait upon You with reverent and believing hearts. Grant us wisdom and clarity to do Your will completely, cheerfully, and without hesitation. We are so aware that this world is lost, and that You plan to call it to account. We believe that Jesus—the One that was crucified, dead, and buried; the One that rose from the dead, ascended into heaven, and now sits at Your right hand—shall come again to judge the living and the dead. Father, we believe this, and we believe that He could come at any time. Father, more than anything, we ask that You prepare us for His return. May we not be distracted, nor cause any delay to our blessed hope. To Your glory and our joy, we pray this in Jesus’ name. Amen.”
Immediately following the collective “Amen,” before the revelation, Doug interjected (Anne rolled her eyes), “Dad, you quoted some of the Apostles’ Creed in your prayer. It reminded me of a conversation I had at lunch today at school. One of my friends, who just found out that I am a preacher’s kid, asked me if I really believed that Mary was a virgin when she had Jesus. I told him flat out, ‘I believe in God the Father Almighty, maker of heaven and earth, and in Jesus Christ His only Son our Lord; who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary.’ My friend laughed at me, called me crazy, and then shouted so all at the table could hear, ‘And he believes in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny.’ Everybody laughed.”
Ashley chimed in, “Why are people so mean? Why don’t people believe anymore?”
“Because they saw their mom and dad put the presents under the tree and the candy in the baskets,” chuckled Anne.
“You know what I mean,” said Ashley in a tone only a mother could voice. “Why don’t people, especially young people, believe in the virgin birth?”
“I don’t believe in the virgin birth,” announced Anne. Deafening silence filled the room and raised Bundt’s ears. She explained, “I believe in the virgin conception, not the virgin birth. The conception was supernatural, but not the birth. The birth involved pain, blood, and pushing. There was no heavenly epidural. It was a natural birth. Isn’t that right, Dad? Just like with my birth, there was a birth canal, a placenta, and an umbilical cord. Isn’t that what you said in your sermon last Christmas?”
What Pastor Donovan said last Christmas was nothing compared to what he was about to say. How do you tell your daughter that she was about to become Mary? How do you convince your wife that this unplanned pregnancy is part of God’s plan? How will Doug handle his friends’ jeering when he defends his sister? Once again, Payne found himself with no answers, just a growing set of questions that soon would be mute, he hoped.
“You are right. That is what I said.” He choked up, paused to catch his breath, and then muttered, “There was an umbilical cord.” The family flashed puzzlement, either because they couldn’t hear him or because they could. Irreversibly, he candidly addressed his family. “There was an umbilical cord. And that is actually what I want to talk to you about at this powwow. On Monday night, I saw the actual umbilical cord of Jesus.”
“Cool,” said Doug with excitement. “What did it look like? Did you touch it?”
“No, I didn’t touch it. And, well, I didn’t actually see it. I saw the reliquary that contains it.”
“How do you know the cord was in it?” asked Anne, adding yet another entry into the catalogue of questions.
“It’s a bit complicated, but I can assure you that it was. I saw with my own eyes film footage of it being captured from the order of sisters that guarded and preserved it.”
“Cool,” repeated Doug, now sitting up straight.
