you feel the way you feel?
Chamber Four—Relationship with Israel and Jewish Life Events
Have you visited Israel? How do you cultivate the relationship you have with Israel? How does it feel when you hear of anti-Semitic behaviors or actions? Are you proud of your Judaism? How do you show this? What are the events in your life you believe define who you are today? Was it the birth of your children? Your wedding? Your graduation? Have you attended a Brit Milah? Bar or Bat Mitzvah? Graduation ceremony? Wedding? Funeral? What wisdom can you share from your life experiences with those who are in the crossroads of these important junctions?
I hope this book will be a source of inspiration to you, and I hope it reaches your heart—m’lev el lev
Dorice surprising her sister for her thirty-ninth birthday in Israel in February of 2015.
Chamber One
RELATIONSHIP TO SELF
What’s in a Name?
The second book of the Torah, Exodus, starts with a portion called shemot, which means “names.” The Exodus story begins with the naming of all the people who went down to Egypt. Why is this important? Why do I want or need to know all these names? After all, they mean nothing to me. But, as I reflect further on the power of our names, I recall Midrash Tanchuma, Vayakhel where our rabbis taught:
“There are three names by which a person is called: the name our parents call us, i.e., the name we are born with; the name people call us; and the name we earn for ourselves. The name one makes for himself is the best one of all.”1
Do you have three names? Why did your parents give you your name? What do you do to make your name what it is? How do we live up to the name our parents gave us? Often, we are named after a person or a quality our parents want us to emulate. Have we done it? Do you feel proud of your name? Are there occasions where we are called names by others? Do you know what others call you? Do you agree with this name? Most importantly, how does one earn their own name?
In my Israeli military service, I was privileged to serve as an officer in a basic training boot camp. The training to become an officer was one of the hardest, yet most fulfilling, accomplishments because remaining in the course depended on my team’s vote. How they viewed me and the name I gained through my actions served as a determining factor for my success. Later in life, while working with teenagers, I witnessed again how crucial is the name we create simply by behaving in a certain way. I had countless conversations with teens as well as adults regarding the importance of their actions as a true portrayal of who they are.
The rabbis concluded that the name we make for ourselves is the best one of all. What makes it best of all? The name we create for ourselves is the sum of all the actions we have engaged in throughout our lives. The good deeds we did, the interactions we had, and the conversations in which we took part.
With the hope that all of us desire to create a name for ourselves that will not only make us proud, but also be truthful to who we are, let’s come up with a few thoughts and actions to illuminate the name we have chosen for ourselves.
Your Personal Lev Moment
1 1.If you do not know whom you were named after or for, do a bit of research. Why did your parents give you this name?
2 2.Ask friends and family you trust: What are the names they have given you? It will usually be adjectives that remind them of you. Ask them why they gave this name to you? How did you earn that name?
3 3.What name would you give yourself?
4 4.Using the concept “name” in the broadest sense (to reflect a person’s identity), what are your three names? Which names would you want? What might you want your children’s names to be?
5 5.What makes the name you have given yourself the best of all? When might it not be the best name of all? On what does it depend?
6 6.Explain the nature of your three names and observe their differences and similarities.
Where Are You Going?
I am always fascinated at how the Hebrew language conveys more meaning than meets the eye. The Hebrew language is a root-based language, meaning words in the Hebrew language are mostly constructed using three main consonants. Since there are a finite number of roots, there are many words that share the same root. This means words may be connected in a meaningful and particular way.
Let’s take, for example, two words that share the same root, conscience and compass. In Hebrew, the word for conscience is matzpoon, written in Hebrew as
What is a “conscience”? It is that inner voice or feeling telling us the direction of where we want to go, i.e., the difference between right and wrong. I truly believe human beings are born with this ability, the ability to know intuitively where they need to go, both spiritually and physically. Often, Jewish writings indicate that if you really listen to what your conscience whispers, you will know the correct next step to take.
Although in English these two words, conscience and compass, have nothing in common (at least not in their spelling), in Hebrew they are very much related. By using our matzpen, or compass, we can know the direction we are going, and if we follow our matzpoon, or conscience, we will arrive there safely.
Wait, there is more! This three-letter root also makes up the word that means “hidden,” tzafoon (
