(1 Thessalonians 2:7-8, 11-12).
Each of these layers reinforces the accountability we have before God for the spiritual development of our children. But acknowledging the responsibility does not guarantee the remedy. The issue is as much of a pragmatic one as it is a diagnostic one. Ultimately, parents may embrace their primary role in discipleship but not know “where to begin or how to proceed.”
This phrase exemplifies why Parent-Driven Discipleship is such a valuable resource. In this concise and insightful book Michael Kennedy offers a compelling case and useful guide for parents to take the spiritual reins of their family and disciple their children the way the Lord intended. It is thoroughly biblical and extremely practical. It is not only informative; it is instructional.
This descriptive phrase would also be an appropriate characterization of Michael and myself when we first met. I was a student pastor with a young family and he was a recently married seminary student who was eager to make a difference. Somehow, through hours of personal and prayerful conversations, we formulated some plans, invested in students, and watched the Lord do some amazing things that we still marvel at today.
Now, over a decade later, God continues to burden our hearts and clarify our vision for how to reach this next generation. As parents ourselves, we now sense an even greater burden to see our own children walking in the truth. We have come to realize, and continue to learn, that ultimately the responsibility for our children’s spiritual growth must begin with us.
This book is a result of Michael’s deep conviction of this truth. His passion for young people and their families encouraged me in our early years serving together and it continues to inspire me today. I know it will do the same for you as you consume and digest Parent-Driven Discipleship.
In His grace,
R. Scott Pace, Ph.D.
Reverend A. E. and Dora Johnson Hughes
Chair of Christian Ministry,
Oklahoma Baptist University
Introduction
A Journey Begins
I remember it like it was yesterday. My wife looked at me with great excitement and said the greatest words a husband can hear, “Honey, I’m pregnant.” There is no doubt I felt a thousand different emotions at that point in time – joy, thanksgiving, excitement, anxiousness, and, in all reality, fear. Questions began to pop up in my mind. Was I ready to be a father? Did I have what it takes to raise a child? What kind of father would I be? Would my child love Jesus? I was a father in the strict sense of the word but was I ready to be a real father, a godly father? This thought gripped me. I heard the words of former professors and pastors reverberating in my mind:
“Parents are held accountable to teach their children the truths of God’s Word.”
“It is your responsibility, as a parent, to live a life that displays the saving gospel of Jesus Christ to your children.”
No. That was my answer. I was not prepared to handle this sort of responsibility. This is not the answer I had hoped to come up with. I wanted to be able to stick out my chest with confidence and assurance and claim, “I am the man for the job.” After all, I was about to graduate from seminary. I had taken Bible classes and theology classes. I could parse Greek verbs and discuss the complexities of the Trinity. If anyone should have been prepared, it would have been me. The problem was I knew I was not the man for the job – at least not yet. This realization drove me to study God’s Word and seek to understand better my responsibility. I wanted to know what God expected of me. I wanted to know how people, throughout church history, had taught their children the truths of Scripture. I wanted my child to love and serve Jesus and I knew I would play a huge role in his or her life.
When Jesus left this earth he gave his disciples a mission. This mission, also known as the Great Commission, is to make disciples of all nations, baptize them, and teach them to observe all of Jesus’ commandments. What a daunting task! Much of the world was hostile to Christianity at this point in time and yet, this was the singular mission Jesus gave His disciples. In fact, the Great Commission was so important that the Holy Spirit guided every gospel writer to include it in their gospel accounts and Luke also included it in the book of Acts (Matthew 28:16-20, Mark 16:14-18, Luke 24:44-49, John 20:19-23, Acts 1:4-8). If we are to understand our role, with respect to our children, we must begin with the Great Commission. The mission of every believer is to make disciples and I can think of no better place to begin than with our own children. Parents should be disciple-makers, first and foremost, in the home.
I am always fascinated by new technology and one of the newest technologies on the market is the ability for cars to parallel park themselves. As the driver, you simply push a button, take your hands off the wheel, and allow the computer to guide the car into the parking place. This technology is amazing and works well but my fear is that we have taken the same approach to the spiritual development of our children. Often, we expect to be able to push a button, take our hands off the wheel, and our children will magically become the spiritual giants that we hoped they would become.
Statistics reveal that Christian parents are rarely involved in the spiritual lives of their children. Scripture, however, paints a very different picture of what this relationship should look like. As parents, we have the responsibility to “drive” the discipleship process in the home. We must keep our hands on the wheel and take responsibility to guide our children as they journey through life. This includes purposefully sharing the gospel with them, teaching them the ways of the Lord, and modeling for them a Great Commission focused lifestyle. The purpose of this book is to examine the biblical responsibility parents have to be involved in their children’s spiritual lives and help equip them to take an active role.
The end goal of this book is that parents and churches will renew their efforts to train this generation of children and teenagers. My greatest desire is that this generation will know Jesus and make Him known throughout the world.
Full-Scale Assault:
Declaring War on the Family
Did you know you are at war? This very moment you are being attacked and you may not even know. Ever since Satan deceived Adam and Eve in the garden, he has continually launched a full-scale assault on marriage and the family. Dr. James Dobson, in his book Marriage Under Fire, wrote,
To put it succinctly, the institution of marriage represents the very foundation of human social order. Everything of value sits on that base. Institutions, governments, religious fervor, and the welfare of children are all dependent on its stability. When it is weakened or undermined, the entire superstructure begins to wobble. That is exactly what has happened during the last thirty-five years, as radical feminists, liberal lawmakers, and profiteers in the entertainment industry have taken their toll on the stability of marriage. Many of our pressing social problems can be traced to this origin.1
Satan is no dummy. He knows that strong Christian families are a detriment to his plans and purposes on this earth and he is doing everything possible to destroy every one of them, including yours. My desire is not to scare you but to sound the alarm. We must open our eyes to reality. In this chapter, we are going to spend some time exploring the origins of the family and the havoc that Satan can bring into the life of the family. We are also going to take a look at the culture around us so that we can see first hand how he is trying to accomplish his mission.
The Family Begins
Are you skeptical of institutions? Many people are and the reason is quite clear – they do not trust institutions. In fact, we have all seen institutions fail because of corruption (think Enron). I want you to consider
