I also give an hour every evening to the little girls. Janey has a musick lesson every day—Annie every second day—twice a week French—twice a week English—twice a week dancing. Alas, when we see company all this happiness must be forborne, but we owe a duty to society as to other things and in its turn it must be paid and a little intercourse with our acquaintance is good both for ourselves and for our children. With friends it is delightful, and we have some even here I should be very sorry to have to part from. In the evening played some of Corelli’s solos, read aloud Mrs. Trollope’s Domestic Manners of the Americans.
14. Janey and Miss Cooper to carry some trifles to poor Biddy Shannon and enquire how many children from Burgage are at school. A poor woman with a sickly baby came for a dispensary ticket: luckily I had some old flannel and socks of Johnny’s for the little wretched thing—and mind, dear little girls, never to throw away anything. I consider the servants sufficiently well off with their wages, well fed, well housed, and no hardship, and all old clothes I put carefully away, sure that some day some distressed persons will want them. The merest rag goes into a rag bag which when full a poor woman will sell for a few pennies. Cut out shifts and bibs for some poor—sixty yards of calico for one pound; how much comfort to be given for the price of one smart bonnet.
15. My account day very busy, brought up Tom Darker’s books to the end of the year and quite satisfied with the Farm, having sold from it upwards of two hundred pounds worth besides all the hay, corn, straw and potatoes consumed by the family.
16. Too busy moving furniture to get out; reading the paper over the fire saw ‘more insults by the French to the British flag’ somewhere on the Coast of Africa. Add this to the West Indies, the Mauritius, etc. and then this nice business in China—the Chartists—the Queen’s pecuniary embarrassments with her income of upwards of three hundred thousand a year—the disreputable character of her court composed of the needy, the frivolous, the profligate, and the weakness if not the wickedness of the ministry—what awful times.
A most unladylike letter came from Mrs. Moore to Sarah. I was quite unprepared for the extreme shabbiness, the heartlessness, the total want of gentlewomanly feeling betrayed by this extraordinary production. I was too seriously angry to be able to advise a proper answer till I had waited for near an hour and then it required a little controul to keep the reply sufficiently civil and sufficiently decided. Mrs. Moore after all is but an Irishwoman—uneducated, selfish, peremptory, unfeeling to those beneath her; she is a fair sample of her countrywomen—pleasant and ladylike in the drawing-room and the less that is known of her out of it the better.
17. I write here, my little girls, to let you see the evil consequences of want of propriety in the conduct of a mistress of a family towards her servants. You will be, I hope, too well brought up to find like poor Mrs. Moore any pleasure in the gossip of a servant; these undereducated persons are of course apt to quarrel among themselves. And be lenient in judging of them. Do not expect from uncontrolled tempers the same patience strict discipline has I hope produced in yourselves, nor imagine that uninstructed people can perform their duties as conscientiously as you would do. But endeavour by strictness and kindness to induce them to serve you well—teach them to improve themselves by your example and by your advice and by your assistance. Good books, a kind though serious reproof, and above all family prayer properly followed up will effect this in all who are worthy of remaining with you.
I do not know any part of an Irishwoman’s character that so ill bears to be scrutinised as her conduct towards her dependants generally—her servants in particular. She is capricious with her tradespeople, and exacting, and bargain-making—almost unknown to her husband’s tenants—of very little use to the poor—very fine in her own person—very niggardly in her own house—treating her servants as in other countries people do not treat dogs and her governess as no other lady would treat a servant. All the fault of education, the evils of which of course descend, rendering the lower order of Irish generally as unworthy of confidence as the upper are of intimacy. At present with the exception of Tulfarris the Hornidge family home I know of neither ladies nor gentlemen in Ireland—and even there I am not thoroughly satisfied.
18. Queen opened parliament in person with a sad silly speech—things of importance hardly touched on—about the weakest ever uttered of all those unmeaning productions. Great fears of the Chartists doing mischief in London. I can just remember walking on Windsor Terrace when a very little girl, and my brother William at school at Eton to see the old King George iii with Queen Charlotte. How much per cent has the value of royalty fallen since those days and like enough to get down to zero before very long if this silly girl has not fixed on a wise husband. We all seem tired of the folly of such a Court, really a disgrace instead of the blessing it might be.
19. Found the Doctor at home in sad distress at Mrs. Moore’s discreditable conduct. Made me promise not to whisper it even—seemed delighted I had burned her notes. Indeed I will try to forget them thinking perhaps I have judged her unfairly by a standard with which she is perfectly unacquainted, viz: the feelings of an English lady, and then her father one of the profligate though brilliant set that shone when neither religion nor morality was in fashion, her mother not to be mentioned in the line with the word lady, and herself very much spoiled by family flattery before marriage, a husband’s folly after, and too clever often to meet with an equal among her own sex; naturally of an arrogant temper, selfish and under-educated—a really fine character that has been irreparably injured.
There is such an evil spirit abroad, in all the manufacturing districts especially that it is impossible not to dread future events, and the links which used to connect the different ranks of society together have been so rudely cut asunder by the haughty bearing of the aristocracy of birth that very unkind feelings have been created between classes which might have been mutually agreeable and together most useful to the community at large. A little of the Highland manners would have done more for the good of the empire than people are perhaps aware. Who ever there thinks less of the purest blood in Europe because the hand of the highly-born is extended to every fellow creature—his table open to every person of respectability—his assistance at the command of every individual round him? All his dependants known to him by name—their well-being as much his object as that of his own family. When did anyone hear of Radicals in the Highlands? Are there any Chartists there? And where can be found such a society of gentlemen as among her chiefs and nobles. There was nothing struck me so remarkably when I first came here as the tenants marrying their children—setting them up in different trades, etc. without ever saying one word about it to their landlord. It went through their whole conduct—we were to them only the receivers of a much grudged rent. It has been my endeavour faithfully pursued through many discouragements to establish a more affectionate intercourse between us. I have certainly succeeded in a great degree—time is acting for me—and I hope you, my dear children, will assist in accomplishing the good work which will provide you with humble but true friends, and give my little Johnny an improving tenantry.
21. Mr. O’Connell telling unblushing falsehoods as usual and using language in the House such as he uses to his mobs—called to order even by the Speaker. What a disgrace to have him and his tail in a British House of Commons—an assemblage once of gentlemen.
25. Little Post girl came for the little bundle we had made up for her to help her on her way to Australia—the poor thing was going with one shift, one frock, etc. I told her what she would most want. She is a wise girl—a friendless orphan will do better there than here.
28. Janey and I walked through all the mud to school— twenty-seven children all clean and happy looking; boys reading—girls at work—three sewing beautifully. Called at Judy [Ryan’s], found it all filthy, house, people, children and pig! Poor Sarah, if she does take the vacant room there she surely will not stay long with such a crew and so nasty.
31. Most beautiful day. What a fine winter. For these windy storms do incalculable good. They dry the ground— drive
