you don’t do it while the man in you is still in control, eventually the wolf will take over. It’s going to happen, either way,” Paoli insisted.
“I don’t care,” William said.
He read the passage again, a little desperately. Sure enough, it didn’t say anything about a choice. But he couldn’t have a mate. He wasn’t a pure werewolf, and he was owned—owned—by the Coven. If he had a mate, they’d own her, too.
He’d be helpless to protect her from them.
Emily’s face flashed in his mind. He wouldn’t do that to her. He wouldn’t force her to be enslaved. Besides, a wolf had already tried to change her sister—her twin sister—and the results were disastrous.
He groaned inwardly.
As if the situation wasn’t already bad enough, this new knowledge just made it worse. Every word in the book proved Paoli right, whether he wanted to admit it or not. It was the only thing that made sense. She was his mate. A mate he’d never even thought to hope for, and she was right here, in this very house. But he couldn’t have her. With a vicious growl, he shoved the book away and stalked from the room.
William lay wide awake in bed, hours later. His hands were tucked behind his head, and he stared intently at the ceiling. His lack of knowledge was frustrating. He and Paoli had always been isolated from other immortals because William didn’t exactly fit anywhere in their world. That, and his job made him more or less the boogeyman of the immortals.
No one except Paoli was comfortable around him, which kept him set up as an outcast. He’d never considered the downside of it. Now he was faced with a wolf problem, and Paoli had no more knowledge or understanding than he did, since mates were specifically a wolf issue. His lack of basic knowledge had never been so glaringly obvious.
For over an hour he’d searched Paoli’s books before he tried the internet and read everything he could locate on the subject. There was precious little to be found.
He needed to talk to a werewolf.
There was only one he knew well enough to ask about something so personal, but Empusa had become a guard to the Coven about a century ago. Since William was currently hedging orders from the Coven, calling Empusa was not a good idea. He wouldn’t put Empusa into a position to either lie or betray a trust.
William caught himself straining to hear sounds from the room on the other side of his bedroom wall. He groaned in frustration and sat up, too full of restless energy to be still.
What he needed was a hunt to distract him. It was the end of the full moon cycle, and he could feel his wolf’s driving need to heed her call. Besides, it would do him good to head into the woods and find something he could sink his fangs into.
With the thought of fresh, dripping meat in mind, he padded on bare feet into the hall. He glanced at Emily’s door and paused, staring intently at it for several minutes.
There was more than one way to rid himself of excess energy.
Paoli’s suggestion came back into his mind and tempted him further. “Take her in your arms,” he’d said. William had never wanted anything more. But if he took her, there was no turning back. For either of them.
Still, the thought of her lying in bed, his oversized shirt hiked up to bare a glimpse of her rounded—he jerked his thoughts away. With a growl, he snapped his teeth together at the door and forced himself to leave the house.
As soon as his feet hit the front porch, he slid effortlessly into his wolf’s form, feeling his skin give way to different muscles and the smooth slide of fur over him. He launched himself from the porch with his strong back legs and headed into the woods.
There was something so freeing about losing the mantle of humanity and letting the wolf have free reign. In wolf form, his mind remained intact, but changed in subtle ways. The concerns that weighed on him were as nothing. He was able to let the wolf instincts guide him and lose himself in the thrill of the hunt.
A deer ran somewhere ahead. He picked up on the scent and tracked it ruthlessly, his body held low and quiet. It took some time to locate the buck. The forest covered several acres, and the animal had clearly been there a long time, leaving scent trails in several different places.
Finally, he located it, bent low over a spot of thick vegetation. Keen senses detected his presence too late. By the time the animal realized the danger, William had already brought it down and killed it, quickly and efficiently. Long fangs tore the carcass apart, and for a while, William lost himself in the aftermath of a fresh kill and the joy of the night.
When he eventually shifted back into human form, the first rays of dawn were pushing back the blanket of darkness. A new day was beginning. He stopped at the porch railing and watched the gray slowly fade away the shadows, wondering at the significance for the first time in many years.
It was a new day, indeed.
He made his way back upstairs with exhaustion riding him hard, took a quick shower to clean himself of the hunt, and lay down to sleep at last. Exhausted and sated, sleep came blissfully quick.
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