they were alone for the journey. It would take several hours to reach Kent, a change in horses, a meal at an inn.
Megan crossed her arms defiantly and gazed out the carriage window. A frown replaced her pout. “I will not call this man ‘Father.’ I utterly refuse. I had a papa, and he died.”
“Elwyn was your papa in every sense. He loved you as if you were his own,” Abbie said gently.
“You have ruined my life,” Megan accused as her lower lip quivered. “Why tell me at all? And don’t say because you and Papa agreed to wait until I was older. You could have kept this horrible secret once he passed and I never would have been the wiser. Please turn the carriage about and head home.”
“No, Megan.”
“You want to see this man again, and you are using me to reopen the acquaintance,” she snapped irritably.
This lay close to the truth. Too close. But it wasn’t the entire truth. “Yes, I want to see him again. I’ve had sufficient time to move past most of my anger. But more importantly, what your father told me more than once in years past holds true: Garrett Wollstonecraft deserves to know.”
“He truly doesn’t know about me?”
Abbie shook her head. “We had already gone our separate ways when I found I was with child. Our parting was not under the best of circumstances.” A decided understatement.
Megan glared at her. “Why didn’t you tell him then? If he was any kind of gentleman he would have married you. You said that he’s the son of an earl.”
“My dear, we were both eighteen years old. Barely four years older than you are now. We were children, and we fought before we parted. Hurtful words cutting deep on both sides. I never even told my parents who the father was.” Abbie gave her daughter a shaky smile. “I was scared, angry, and, yes, immature. I came to understand that I should have returned to Kent and informed him of my condition. You see, we had no business doing…what we did. We were too young and naïve to understand the consequences.”
“And I am the consequence.” Megan frowned. “Did you love him at all? Or was the encounter nothing but a scandalous affair?”
Abbie moved to the opposite bench and slipped her arm about Megan’s shoulder. “You were not a consequence, but a miracle. The happiest day of my life is when they placed you in my arms.” Megan’s eyes glistened with unshed tears. “I did love him, most desperately. Never think that you were not conceived in love, for you were. It was not cheap and tawdry. Ill-advised, perhaps, even scandalous, but the emotions were real.” At least on my end.
“I cried all night when you told me this. Papa, who I still love dearly and miss fiercely, is not my real father. Do you understand how devastating it was to hear? I feel like a part of me has been ripped away. How could you do this to me?” Megan pulled away from her. “I wish you had never told me. I also wish I hadn’t agreed to this. I don’t want to meet him. I’ve changed my mind. Please, please, can we turn about and go home?”
Abbie could hear the anger and hurt in Megan’s voice, and her heart tightened in empathy. Who wouldn’t be affected by such a revelation? The secret was indeed shocking. “No, Megan. We are already more than halfway there. Meet him, at least. If you choose, you never have to see him again. The decision will be yours. I promise.”
“I will hold you to your vow.” Megan gazed out the window for several minutes. “What does he look like? Is it because of him that I have all this red hair?” she asked. “I often wondered why I had red hair and you and Papa did not.” Her lower lip quivered. “I look nothing like Papa. I see it now.” At least the question showed she was a little curious about Garrett, though her tone displayed her annoyance. It also revealed her deep sadness at not being Elwyn’s biological daughter.
“Yes. Garrett is half Scottish on his mother’s side. What does he look like?” Abbie sighed. “He was formidable at eighteen, well over six feet in height then, with broad shoulders and the most glorious head of silky red hair. Handsome beyond measure. I became smitten immediately.”
Telling Megan that she had seen Garrett in the village last week would not be prudent. It had opened an old wound, and as a result all her passionate emotions had escaped. Abbie believed she had conquered them and buried them deep. The sad truth is that she had never stopped yearning for Garrett. Not even when she lay in her husband’s arms. A lone tear slipped down her cheek, and she quickly dashed it away before Megan saw it. She’d adored Elwyn and tried her damnedest to fall in love with him, but her heart belonged to one man only. The man who had broken it.
Abbie would not be able to move on with her life if she did not face Garrett one last time. Tell the truth about Megan. Find out once and for all if his cruel words were true. Or had he used them to distance himself from her, all because of his so-called family curse? “We will have a nice visit with Alberta and Jonas, and while we are there you will meet Garrett Wollstonecraft.”
Megan nodded, her expression still stony. “Very well, Mama. I will meet him. But I do not have to like him or accept him.” She paused, then said. “The only thing I am looking forward to is seeing Jonas. Truly, he is why I agreed to this. He’s the most beautiful boy that I have ever seen. Can a boy be beautiful?”
“Well, Jonas is twenty-four now, hardly a boy.”
Megan tapped her temple with her gloved finger. “He is a boy in here, a very sweet boy.”
“He always will be, Megan. And if a man could be categorized as beautiful, Jonas would fit, with his perfect features and golden-blond hair.” She sighed. “Do not become too attached, my dear. Nothing can come from it.”
Megan remained silent for several moments, as if digesting what Abbie said. “But he is a man; he would have all those desires men experience, would he not?”
Abbie sat up straight and stared at her daughter incredulously. “What are they teaching you at that school?” A frisson of alarm tolled in Abbie’s head. Five years past, when Alberta and Jonas had last visited, Megan had formed an attachment to Jonas that Abbie had found endearing, but with Megan on the cusp of womanhood? Already she was a well-developed girl for her age and too bold by half. Perhaps this trip was a mistake on more than one level.
“Love can happen at a young age. It did in Romeo and Juliet,” Megan declared.
“It’s a tragedy.”
Megan shrugged. “Not all love has to be tragic. Or turn out as terrible as yours.”
Well. A direct hit. “We are not speaking about me. You’re still young, with years ahead of you and many young men to meet before you decide about love.” She patted Megan’s gloved hand. “In the meantime, this will be a difficult enough visit. Thinking of Jonas as only a friend would be wise.”
Megan turned to stare out the window again, not replying. Oh, good heavens, did she harbor a tendre for Jonas? There lay heartache. First loves could cut to the very soul—especially when they go wrong. Abbie knew this more than anyone.
The carriage arrived at the Eatons’ shortly past the dinner hour, and with the happy greetings out of the way, everyone had been ushered into the parlor and trays of food brought in.
When they had first stepped into the room Jonas happily hugged them both, though Megan had held on to him longer than was decent. The young man looked as dazzling as ever. Goodness, should she allow them
