a week after I discovered my inner self, I was sitting at my desk working on an article for Something Awful. The doorbell rang and I answered to find a FedEx deliveryman. I signed for a standard FedEx shipping envelope.
I tore open the perforated tab and a single playing card spilled out into my hand. It was the ace of spades—the death card.
On the back was a message written in fine-tipped black marker.
“I see you when you’re sleeping.”
It was signed with the initial “A” printed in a circle.
I called Anders and received his voice mail. The message I left for him was, well, let’s just say it was intemperate. I promised to do things to his face that are a crime just to contemplate. I remember at the end of the call I told him I would jump up and down on him until his guts popped out of the top of his head like a tube of toothpaste.
Anders never returned the call, which was probably for the best. He wasn’t the sender of the mysterious message.
By the time I learned the true identity of the sender it was much too late.
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