was desperate to have his own show. Being a supporting character on DangerMouse’s show made him incredibly envious.
Much to his surprise, seven years after DangerMouse premiered, Count Duckula was given his very own show in the form of a spin-off series. The series featured a slew of characters, almost all of which were anthropomorphized birds. Like any good vampire, Duckula had his own Van Helsing antagonist character, Dr. Von Goosewing. Duckula was also accompanied by his butler, Igor, and his aptly named nanny, Nanny.
The show also featured a unique view into the nature of life and death. Duckula was killed several times but was constantly reincarnated through a blood ritual by his servants. Just the kind of wholesome content parents want in a kid’s show.
During the ritual for the current incarnation of Duckula, his servants accidentally used ketchup instead of blood, which resulted in the count being a vegetarian. Besides Count Chocula, this makes him the only other vampire to not drink blood. It also gives him a much better chance at hooking up with that cute vegan chick who works at the coffee shop.
The Fresh Count of Bel-Air
Sir William the Fresh, a young vampire from West Philadelphia, born and raised, spent most of his days on the playground. William enjoyed spending most of his time with his friends, or as they liked to say, “chillin’ out,” “maxin’,” or “relaxin’ all cool.”
Aside from drinking human blood, William played a lot of basketball outside of his school. One day while “chillin’ out” with his compatriots, William was accosted by a group of local vampire hunters. He was able to escape unharmed, but the news of this altercation quickly reached William’s mother. Frightened, she immediately arranged for William to be sent to live with his aunt and uncle in Bel-Air.
William hailed for a cab and was quickly greeted by a peculiar sight. The taxi that awaited him was adorned with a custom license plate that said “FRESH” and had a pair of dice hanging from the rearview mirror. It was quite the rare sight. Upon entering the vehicle, William was met with quite a pungent odor. The odor wasn’t garlic, but the stale stench of the taxi driver. It was so strong, however, that it might as well have been garlic. William very much wished to “smell [him] later.”
The ride was unbearable, but the taxi eventually arrived at his destination. William exited the vehicle, excused his driver, and set his eyes upon his new kingdom. The drastic change of scenery had effectively “flipped-turned” William’s life upside down. He gazed upon this new land: a pure, untapped source of new victims. From that day forth, William reigned atop a throne of human skulls as the Fresh Count of Bel-Air.
2. Transylvania
We are in Transylvania, and Transylvania is not England. Our ways are not your ways, and there shall be to you many strange things. Nay, from what you have told me of your experiences already, you know something of what strange things there may be.
—Count Dracula ( Dracula, 1897)
Even the less geographically inclined of us have some kind of knowledge of Transylvania. Known to many as the home of the most well-known vampire of them all, Dracula, Transylvania serves as a historical vampire provenance of sorts. But is this place even real? If so, where is it? Is it in a nice neighborhood? Would you recommend it as a family vacation spot? What kinds of time-share options are available?
There are actually several places that go by the name Transylvania, many of which can be found in the United States.
Transylvania, the North Carolina County
There’s a small county in North Carolina called Transylvania. There’s really nothing else about it worth mentioning. It’s North Carolina after all. They do have a ton of Confederate flags (figure 8).
Figure 8. A North Carolinian vampire doing what he does best: discriminating against black people.
Transylvania, the Louisiana Community
In East Carroll Parish, Louisiana, there’s a little community that goes by the name Transylvania. Being a parish, it’s a widely religious area and contains a large amount of churches, which is ironic for a place so closely related to vampirism. The community is home to the Transylvania General Store, which sells vampire-and bat-related merchandise to travelers passing through. This lively community also features a post office, a water tower, and an immense amount of dirt.
Transylvania, the University
Transylvania University is a liberal arts college located in Lexington, Kentucky. Once again, it also has ironically close ties with Christianity, relating to the Protestant congregation of the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ).
It’s uncertain what leads religious people toward using a name already heavily associated with the occult. One reason could be the idea of reappropriation, taking a term that was used negatively and turning it back into something positive, much like feminists did with the word bitch5 or homosexuals did with the word fag.6
The school itself is home to approximately 1,100 students, over half of which are members of a Greek organization. Many fraternities and sororities have chapters at “Transy”—as it’s commonly referred to—including the illustrious Delta Sigma Phi (
Transylvania, the Henderson Colony
For a short while, there was a colony that once existed in an area spanning between what is now Kentucky and Tennessee that went by the name Transylvania. In 1775, American pioneer and merchant Richard Henderson of North Carolina purchased the area from the Cherokee Indians during a meeting with their leader, Chief Attakullakulla (figure 9).
Figure 9. Yo, I’m Chief Attakullakulla / Don’t mess with no Dracula / Sold all of Transylvania / Just to score some more crackulla / Jyeah!
Henderson hired famous American trailblazer Daniel Boone to establish the Wilderness Trail, a principal route of travel that was used for more than fifty years by thousands of people. The trail stretched from Fort Chiswell in Virginia, through the Cumberland Gap and into central Kentucky, right through the Transylvania colony. During his trailblazing efforts, Boone came across the Kansas River. While attempting to ford the river, he lost three oxen, two spare wheels, 120 pounds of food, and Maggie died of dysentery.7
While not all of it is used for travel, most of the trail can still be seen today. A portion of the trail was among the first roads in the United States to be paved, the Cumberland Gap is now a national park, and portions of the Wilderness Trail can be visited at the Wilderness Road State Park in Virginia.
The colony, however, did not share the same lasting effect. In 1776, a mere one year after Henderson obtained the land, Virginia invalidated the purchase and the colony ceased to exist. Henderson went on record to proclaim, “Thanks, Virginia. Dicks.”
Transylvania, the Space Galaxy
In the movie The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Tim Curry plays a transvestite8
