The World of David Walliams: 7 Book Collection. David Walliams
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“I am so sorry,” said Chloe. “If people only knew that…”
“Like I said on the televisual apparatus, every homeless person has a story to tell,” said Mr Stink. “That’s mine. I am sorry it didn’t involve spies or pirates or what have you. Real life isn’t like that, I’m afraid. And I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“Christmas must be the hardest time for you,” said Chloe.
“Yes, yes, of course. Christmas is an emblem of perfect happiness I find very hard to bear. It’s a time when families come together. For me it’s a reminder of who’s not there.”
The bus reached their stop, and Chloe’s arm found a home in Mr Stink’s as they walked towards the family house. She was relieved to see that all the reporters and camera crews had moved on. The funny old tramp must be old news by now.
“I just wish I could make everything right,” said Chloe.
“But you are making everything right, Miss Chloe. Ever since you came and talked to me. You’ve made me smile again. You’ve been so kind to me. You know, if my child had ended up like you, I would have been very proud.”
Chloe was so touched she could hardly think what to say. “Well,” she said, “I know you would have made a great dad.”
“Thank you, child. Unimaginable kindness.”
Nearing the house, Chloe looked at it and realised something. She didn’t want to go home. She didn’t want to live with her awful Mother and have to go to that horrible posh school any more. They walked in silence for a moment, then Chloe he took a deep breath and turned to Mr Stink.
“I don’t want to go back there,” she said. “I want to go wandering with you.”
“I‘m sorry Miss Chloe, but you can’t possibly come with me,” said Mr Stink as they stood in the driveway.
“Why not?” protested Chloe.
“For a million different reasons!”
“Name one!”
“It’s too cold.”
“I don’t mind the cold.”
“Well,” said Mr Stink, “living on the streets is far too dangerous for a young girl like you.”
“I’m nearly thirteen!”
“It’s very important you don’t miss school.”
“I hate school,” said Chloe. “Please please please, Mr Stink. Let me come with you and the Duchess. I want to be a wanderer like you.”
“You must think about this properly for a moment, child,” said Mr Stink. “What on earth is your mother going to say?”
“I don’t care,” snapped Chloe. “I hate her anyway.”
“I’ve told you before, you mustn’t say that.”
“But it’s true.”
Mr Stink sighed. “Your mind is made up is it?”
“One hundred percent!”
“Well, in that case, I’d better go and talk to your mother for you.”
Chloe grinned. This was superbrilliantamazing! It was really going to happen. She was going to be free at last! No more being sent to bed early. No more maths homework. No more wearing yellow frilly dresses that made her look like a Quality Street. Chloe was a hundred times more excited than she had ever been in her life. She and Mr Stink were going to wander the world together, eating sausages for breakfast, lunch and dinner, having baths in ponds, and emptying Starbucks wherever they went…
“Thanks so much, Mr Stink,” she said, as she put her key in the lock for the last time.
As Chloe raced excitedly around her room throwing clothes and the chocolate bars she had hidden under her bed into her bag, she could hear faint voices in the kitchen downstairs. Mother won’t care, thought Chloe. She’ll hardly miss me anyway! The only person she cares about is Annabelle.
Chloe looked around her little pink room. Strangely, she felt a tingle of fondness for it now that she was leaving. And she was going to miss Dad, and of course Annabelle, and even Elizabeth the cat, but a new life was calling her. A life of mystery and adventure. A life of making up bed-time stories about vampires and zombies. A life of burping in the faces of bullies!
Just then, there was a gentle knock on the door. “I’m just coming, Mr Stink!” Chloe called out, as she threw the last ornamental owl into her bag.
The door opened slowly. Chloe turned around and gasped.
It wasn’t Mr Stink.
It was Mother. She stood in the corridor, her eyes red from crying. A tear was running down her cheek and a little plastic snowman dangled incongruously above her head.
“My darling Chloe,” she spluttered. “Mr Stink just told me you wanted to leave home. Please. I beg you, don’t go.”
Chloe had never seen Mother looking so sad. Suddenly, she felt a little guilty. “I, er, just thought you wouldn’t mind,” she said.
“Mind? I couldn’t bear it if you left.” Mother started sobbing now. This was so unlike her. It was as if Chloe was looking at another person entirely.
“What did Mr Stink say to you?” she asked.
“The old man gave me a good talking to,” said Mother. “Said how unhappy you’ve been at home. How I had to work at being a better mother. He told me how he’d lost his own family, and if I wasn’t careful, I was going to lose you. I felt so ashamed. I know we haven’t always seen eye to eye on things Chloe, but I do love you. I really do.”
Chloe was horrified. She’d thought Mr Stink was just going to ask if she could go with him, but instead he’d made Mother cry. She was furious with him. This wasn’t the plan at all!
And just then, Mr Stink appeared solemnly in the doorway. He stood a pace behind Mother.
“I’m sorry Chloe,” he ventured. “I hope you can forgive me.”
“Why did you say what you did?” she asked angrily. “I thought we were going to wander the world together.”
Mr Stink smiled kindly. “Maybe one day you’ll wander the world on your own,” he said. “But for now, trust me, you need your family. I would give anything to have mine back. Anything.”
Mother’s