Diana Wynne Jones’s Magic and Myths Collection. Diana Wynne Jones
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Hayley followed them out through the building, fatalistically expecting Uncle Jolyon to be waiting outside for them. But the only person there was Aunt Ellie. Hayley would have known who she was, even without the way the other two dropped their bags and flung their arms round her. Aunt Ellie looked like Aunt May gone respectable.
“Mother!” Harmony cried out, nestling her smooth dark head against Aunt Ellie’s carefully curled grey one.
“Good to see you, Mum!” Troy said, wrapping his arms around her neat grey suit. “This is Hayley. Hayley, meet my mother, Electra.”
Just like Aunt May, Aunt Ellie dived forward and hugged Hayley. “My dear,” she said. She sounded very Scottish. “I’m so glad you’re here! Come along, all of you. The car’s away over there, and you wouldn’t believe how much it costs to park in this place, so please hurry. Besides, your Aunt Aster’s waiting in it.”
Harmony and Troy both groaned.
“I know, I know,” Aunt Ellie said, hurrying them across the road. “I had to bring Aster. Jolyon said I wasn’t to let her out of my sight. She’s gone and formed a most unfortunate attachment to a great rough Highlander – at her time of life, I ask you! Even if Jolyon hadn’t told me to keep them apart, I would have put my foot down about it. The whole town’s talking. To think of my sister causing all this scandal – it keeps me awake at nights! The man haunts the place!”
“Who is he?” Troy asked, trying to hitch the duffel bag on his shoulder alongside his backpack.
“The Lorrd knows!” said his mother, more Scottish than ever. “I think him to be some gamekeeper from one of those shooting preserves in the North. He carries a gun. Eats with his knife! Jolyon thinks him unspeakable.”
“Was Uncle Jolyon here?” Harmony asked anxiously. “When?”
“Two days ago,” Aunt Ellie said. “He seemed to think young Hayley was with me.” At this, Troy and Harmony exchanged pleased, relieved smiles. “Hayley, what have you done to put Jolyon in this terrible mood?”
“I think,” Hayley said timidly, “I wasn’t supposed to have gone to Ireland.”
“Now that is unreasonable of Jolyon,” Aunt Ellie said. “Why ever not, you poor child?”
They had by then arrived beside a neat grey car.
Aunt Ellie bent down and shouted through its window at the dim figure sitting in the back seat. “Aster! Hayley’s here! Open this window and say hallo to her. Asterope! Do you hear me?”
The window went down to reveal a pale faced little lady with a fluffy mass of faded fair hair. She fixed washed-out blue eyes on Hayley and quavered, “Pleased to meet you, Hayley. Your hair is very untidy.”
Hayley stared at her. It was quite impossible to believe that this faded-out little woman could cause great rough Highlanders to haunt her. It just did not seem likely. “How do you do, Aunt Aster?” she said politely.
“Oh, not so bad,” Aunt Aster quavered. “I’m a poor traveller, you know, and Electra does drive so dangerously.”
When Troy had slung the bags into the boot and climbed into the back seat beside Hayley, and Harmony had settled in the front, the car set off so sedately that Hayley knew Aunt Aster had been talking nonsense. Aunt Ellie must have been one of the world’s most cautious drivers. But Aunt Aster continued to talk nonsense. While they drove through the city, she kept quavering, “There’s a red light on the other road, Electra. You have to stop.” And when at last they came out into the country, she quavered, “Not so fast, Electra! You’re doing nearly thirty!” or “There’s a car coming, Electra. It’s going to hit us. Stop until it’s gone by!” or “Electra, here’s a bus!”
Aunt Ellie took no notice and drove slowly on – although once or twice Hayley distinctly heard her mutter, “Silly bizzom!” – while the countryside became more and more beautiful around them. First it was sloping green fields with blue hills above, and then it was real mountains. Hayley leant forward to look at a long narrow loch surrounded in pine trees, among great brown and purple mountains swathed in drifting cloud. Whereupon Aunt Aster quavered, “Sit back, poor child. You’ll get hurt if we stop.”
Troy whispered into Hayley’s other ear, “Isn’t she a pain?”
Hayley said, “This country’s lovely!”
“I agree,” said Troy, at the same time as Aunt Aster quavered, “Oh, no, town is so much nicer! I can’t wait to get back to town. It’s civilisation.”
Civilisation, when they came to it, was in the form of neat streets of harsh grey houses, looking quite small under a huge brown shoulder of mountain. Each house had different sharp corners and precisely spiked roofs, which seemed to say, We are civilised, we are respectable. Take no notice of this mountain.
“Ah!” Aunt Aster said happily.
Aunt Ellie’s house was down the end, up a slight hill. As soon as the car had crunched upwards beyond its gates and stopped by the door, Aunt Aster hopped out of it with surprising speed.
“Thank you for the drive, dear,” she called out. “I’ll be getting along to my house now.”
Aunt Ellie shot out of the car even faster and grabbed Aunt Aster by the arm. “No, dear. You’re staying to have supper with us. Remember?”
“But I was only going to look in case the post has come,” Aunt Aster quavered. “I’ll come straight back.”
“You’ll stay with me,” Aunt Ellie said grimly. “I need your help in the kitchen.” She more or less dragged the protesting Aunt Aster in through the pointed front door, saying, “The children will be starving by now.”
“Good,” said Troy as they followed the aunts indoors. “I’m hollow inside.” He led Hayley into one of the front rooms, where everything was as neat and heathery grey as Aunt Ellie’s tweed suit. “Hey, Mum!” he called out. “What have you done with my models?”
Aunt Ellie put her face round the door, looking righteous, with just a hint of guilt underneath. “I tidied them away, Troy. This room looked like a tip.”
“But you promised me you wouldn’t!” Troy said. “You haven’t thrown them away, have you?”
Aunt Ellie looked even more righteous. “Of course not. You’ll find them all in the cupboard in boxes.”
Harmony said to Hayley, “Come upstairs and I’ll show you your bedroom.”
She was obviously removing Hayley from the midst of two growing rows, one between Aunt Ellie and Aunt Aster and the other between Aunt Ellie and Troy. As they went upstairs, Aunt Aster was loudly quavering that she was expecting an important letter and Aunt Ellie had no right to keep her from it, while Troy was shouting, “You broke them! You broke them all up!”
Troy must care a lot about his models, Hayley thought. She had never heard him shout before.
But