back towards the car.
Logan nodded. ‘If it’s any consolation, you’re following a long line of officers in a noble tradition.’
‘Designated piddler?’
‘I used to have to do it all the time. “Oh, I’m bursting for a pee, can I use your toilet?” Then go rummaging through drawers and cupboards while whichever boss it was asked stupid questions.’
‘Yeah …’ Nicholson’s mouth stretched out and down, the tendons sticking out in her neck. ‘You wouldn’t believe some of the things I’ve found tonight. I mean, not kiddie porn or anything, but dildos, and lube, and rubbery things like Ping-Pong balls on a string.’ She curled her top lip. ‘That doctor guy had a butt plug, a ball gag, and furry handcuffs. I mean, can you imagine him all oiled up and—’
The passenger door clunked open and Steel tumbled into the seat. Produced her list of sex offenders and a pen, then drew a thick red line through the address of the young man who interfered with little girls. ‘Right. Next up – Windy Brae.’
Logan stifled a yawn. Then tapped the dashboard clock. ‘That’s twenty past two. I’ve got court tomorrow, remember?’
‘Worried you’ll no’ get enough beauty sleep? Trust me, that boat sailed when you got the shaved-scrotum haircut.’
He opened his mouth … Closed it again. Turned to stare at her. ‘Why are you here?’
‘Told you: trying to catch a wee girl’s—’
‘Oh no you don’t. This …’ He pointed up at the flat. ‘Trolling through the registered sex offenders? That’s no job for a detective chief inspector. That’s a sergeant, maybe DI at most.’
She closed her door. ‘Nothing wrong in taking pride in your work, is there?’
‘You pissed someone off, didn’t you? That’s why you’re here: it’s a punishment. You said something you shouldn’t to Finnie or Young.’
Steel yanked the seatbelt down and rammed it into place. ‘Oh … sod off.’
Logan checked his watch. ‘Right, fifteen more minutes and we’re done.’
Steel shuffled her feet as Nicholson thumbed the bell again. The cottage sat on the brow of a hill, overlooking the cliffs and the sea – still and silent, washed like pewter by the thin smear of light from the crescent moon. Nothing but fields and gorse for miles.
A plume of e-cigarette steam snaked up into the starry night. ‘You used to be a lot more fun.’
‘Just because you’re on nightshift, it doesn’t mean we are too. Some of us have got court tomorrow. Supposed to get eleven hours between the end of any shift and having to give evidence; that’s gone for a Burton.’
‘Don’t say I’m never good to you: Swanson’s heading into Aberdeen first thing with a bunch of productions from the search – she’ll give you a lift. You can snore all the way.’
Nicholson backed away from the door. Stared up at the windows. ‘Maybe he’s not in?’
Another puff. ‘Try round the back.’
She clicked on her LED torch and picked her way past the rose bushes and round the side of the cottage.
Steel stuffed her hands in her pockets, fake fag clamped between her teeth. ‘Don’t know what you’re moaning about. Case is watertight – Graham Stirling’s spending the rest of his natural playing hide the soap with rapists and murderers.’
Logan leaned back against the wall. Yawned. Stretched his arms and legs. ‘So, come on then: Nicholson’s not here any more, what did you do?’
‘Sod all.’ She took a deep drag. Hissed out a thin stream of vapour. ‘Ever occur to you I might miss this?’
‘Knocking up sex offenders in the middle of the night?’
‘No’ sex offenders …’ She pulled out a hand and thumped him on the chest. ‘This. You and me: Cagney and Lacey; Holmes and Watson; Dalziel and Pascoe.’
Laurel and Hardy, more like.
‘Thought you had Rennie now.’
‘Rennie’s no’ the same. He cries when I make fun of him. And McKenzie’s one poke away from an aneurism.’
An owl hooted in the fields behind the cottage. Followed by what sounded like someone knocking over a stack of flowerpots and some muffled swearing.
Logan frowned out into the night. ‘You think there’s anything to this sex offenders getting attacked and going missing thing? That’s twice we’ve heard about it.’
‘Twice out of what, twenty paedos? No’ exactly statistically significant, is it?’
‘Three, if you count Mrs Bartholomew’s “Burn in Hell” threat. And Neil Wood’s dad got beaten up today. Well, technically yesterday, but you know what I mean.’
Steel took another long drag. ‘Not like they don’t deserve it, is it?’
All the parking slots outside the station were taken – a mix of patrol and unmarked pool cars, all bathed in the thin sodium light. The car park out front was full too. Among the more everyday vehicles loomed a couple of police pods and a Transit in full riot gear, its front grille raised like a surprised monobrow.
Logan found them a parking spot further down the street.
Steel creaked her way out of the passenger seat and paused on the pavement for a big stretch. Her blue silk shirt rode up, exposing a slash of dead-fish skin and a bellybutton. ‘Pffff …’ She had a scratch. ‘Any chance of something to eat? Starving.’
Logan nodded back towards the station. ‘Vending machine in the canteen. Crisps, caffeinated drinks, and chocolate.’
Her eyebrows tented in the middle, bringing out the puppy eyes. ‘No chips?’
Nicholson bounced out from the back of the car, following them along the pavement. ‘The baker’s opens at five. They do a great chicken-curry pie.’
Steel checked her watch, then sagged. ‘An hour and twenty minutes … Be a skeleton by then.’
‘Good, you can keep Hector company.’ Logan thumbed the code into the keypad by the tradesmen’s entrance. Then covered his mouth for a long shuddering yawn.
The sound of telephones filtered through the building. Raised voices. Someone laughing.
Nicholson pointed down the corridor towards the Constables’ Office. ‘Paperwork first, Sarge?’
‘Do your actions, then sod off home. Put down for three hours’ overtime.’ He turned to Steel. ‘That’s fair, isn’t it?’
‘Bloody
