of the few things left to collect. He spent all his free time away from the lab, where he worked as a technology expert, studying any language he could get his hands on. He was fluent in ten of them and knew five others well enough to sing ‘Happy Birthday’. A fact he demonstrated as he switched from Russian to Chinese. This was too much, and I giggled.
“Is the birthday girl awake?” he’d asked, and I felt the soft bristle of his beard brush my cheek as he bent to give me a kiss. I giggled, and he flung my covers on to the floor, laughing when I squealed in protest. “She can’t sleep the day away! Up! Up! Or you won’t have time to open your birthday present.” He started another round of ‘Happy Birthday’ in German, and handed me a small package wrapped in one of his grey lab coats.
“What is it?” I asked, sitting up.
“A gigantic spider,” he teased. “I found it wandering around the lab, and thought, I know who’d love this. Sky!”
I rolled my eyes. My dad knew how much I hated bugs. “What is it really?”
“Open it and find out,” he laughed.
I carefully unfolded each of the corners of the lab coat, revealing the soft leather cover of a book.
“But, Dad,” I said, stroking the cover reverently, “we aren’t allowed to own books.”
“Which is why it’s not a book,” he smiled, and lifted the cover to reveal thick ivory pages, each one blank. “It’s a journal.”
“A journal.” I’d repeated the unfamiliar word, trying to hide my disappointment. I’d hoped it was a book. There was nothing better than the feel of a real book. It was so much better than a port screen, but North Compound had strict rules requiring that all books stay in the library for safekeeping. It made sense: just like everything else in the compound, we had no way to replace them, so we had to preserve and protect them.
“You must never show anyone that you have this,” my dad cautioned. “It’s very valuable, and just like the books, individual citizens aren’t allowed to own them.”
“Is it like your compass?” I asked.
“It’s exactly like my compass,” my dad said, pulling it out of its hiding place inside his jacket. “We don’t show anyone or tell anyone that we have it.” I looked down at the journal with newfound appreciation. I’d always been a little jealous of my dad’s compass. It was broken, but it was his. Now I had something that was mine. I liked the feeling.
“How did you get it?” I asked.
“I have my ways.” He winked. “And it’s even more valuable than a book in our library.”
“Really? Why?”
“Because it’s going to contain the great and wonderful thoughts of Sky Mundy,” he smiled.
I studied it for a moment, flipping through its blank pages as though they might shatter if handled too roughly. “Thank you,” I said.
“Anything for you, my dear,” my dad said, hugging my shoulders. “Anything for you.”
Three days later, my dad disappeared. He’d tucked me into bed, and the next thing I knew I was waking up to the marines searching our apartment. One of them had taken my compound-issued backpack and stuffed some of my clothes into it before making me sit outside in the tunnel. I must have been a sorry sight: seven years old, terrified and crying so hard my eyes had practically swollen shut as everything in our apartment was confiscated. No one searched my bag, though. It went unnoticed in the chaos. If they had, they’d have found the journal, cleverly concealed within the lining at the bottom of the bag. My dad had managed to hide it for me in the one place the marines wouldn’t think to look. It had been so well hidden that I hadn’t found it until weeks later when I noticed that my bag was heavier than it should be. I could still remember how excited I’d been.
I’d opened the journal eagerly, expecting a letter from my dad explaining why he’d left the way he had, and when he was going to come back for me. But as I paged through and found it blank, my heart sank. He had left me nothing.
It wasn’t until I reached the back half of the journal that I discovered its secret, and I gasped at what my dad had done to my birthday present. A rough circle had been cut out of the back half-inch of pages, creating the perfect hiding spot for his worn brass compass. I gingerly pulled it out of its paper nest, rubbing my fingers across the worn brass. The lid of the compass had long ago broken off and the small dial inside that was supposed to point north was stuck halfway between south and west. I’d flipped through the remaining pages, each with a gaping hole in its centre, but every single one was blank. No note. No explanation. What good were hundreds of blank pages if he couldn’t even fill one?
I felt like someone had punched me in the gut, and for a moment I almost believed the marines. Maybe my dad really was just a selfish criminal. Maybe he didn’t have a reason for leaving the compound, and me, behind. I’d squeezed my eyes shut and let the pain and anger roar through me until all that was left was a hollow pinched feeling in my chest.
But then I’d opened my eyes, set the compass back inside the journal for safekeeping and pushed away my doubts. Although I’d still been bitter that he’d had time to hide his precious compass but not to write even one word to me, I knew my dad. He wouldn’t have left me unless he absolutely had to.
After that day, I’d begun researching dinosaurs and putting my findings on to those empty pages. We knew about the dinosaurs of a hundred and fifty years ago, but no one was brave enough to do any kind of extended study on the dinosaurs that roamed our world now. So I read the few books we had in our library, trying to understand what my dad might have faced when he left the compound to survive topside.
Surviving topside. The statement alone was one of those oxymorons, like friendly takeover or loud whisper. No one could survive topside. The human race was no longer at the top of the food chain. In fact, we were somewhere near the bottom these days. And after centuries of being the predator, we weren’t very good at being the prey. The thought of what my dad had encountered up there terrified me. If I was brutally honest with myself, I knew the odds were against him surviving very long, but part of me was unwilling to give up the hope that he was out there somewhere. So while I waited underground, desperate for answers, I researched the creatures that made the topside world so deadly.
I opened my journal to the beginning and looked at my early sketches. I couldn’t help but notice that my drawing skills had really improved. The first dinosaur I’d drawn was weirdly disproportional, and a little froglike. The compound buzzer sounded, and I jumped guiltily. School, I’d forgotten all about school. I ran a hand through my dishevelled curls, making them stand up and frizz out alarmingly. I was still wearing my grimy overalls from the night before, and I looked awful and smelled worse. A shower was not optional this morning. Grabbing my towel, I threw open my door, and yelped in surprise to find Shawn standing there, his hand poised to knock.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, putting my hand to my pounding heart.
“Hello to you too,” Shawn said. He looked me up and down, an eyebrow raised. “Although I have to admit, you’ve looked better. Trying out a new unshowered-crazy-person look I should know about?”
“I was just heading to the shower,” I said.
“I thought you said that you needed my help?” He glanced up and down the tunnel to make sure it was clear and then leaned in conspiratorially.
