The Nit Picker. Jonny Moon

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The Nit Picker - Jonny Moon

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she is old and ugly,” agreed Ruby.

      “No, no, no …” replied Jack.

      “Come off it,” insisted Ruby. “She’s got a face like a block of granite. She’s not only been touched by the Ugly Stick, she’s been beaten around the head by it until she’s dizzy. She’s a total minger.”

      “Yes, yes, yes, I’m not arguing with that,” explained Jack. “But that’s not the point I was trying to make. It’s the skin on her face I was talking about. It doesn’t move right. It’s not natural. It’s like … like she’s had plastic surgery or something.”

      “Why would you have a face-lift and ask to look like that?” wondered Ruby.

      “Because it’s not a face-lift,” said Jack with certainty. “It’s a mask. She must be another GUNK Alien in disguise.”

      Ruby stared at him. “You’re not serious.”

      “I am.”

      “The Nit Nurse is an alien?”

      “I’m afraid so,” said Jack.

      “So what do you think she’s doing to the kids?” Ruby asked.

      “I don’t know,” Jack confessed. “But I’m going to find out. Somehow kids who get their nits treated are losing their get-up-and-go.”

      “So we’re looking for an alien that makes people lose interest in things,” mused Ruby. “Maybe Snivel can come up with an answer.”

      Snivel couldn’t come to school – his unusual appearance would lead to too many questions. So Jack had to wait until all his lessons were over to investigate further. As usual, Snivel arranged to meet Jack at the local park. Oscar had shown no interest in the whole situation and had decided to go home straight after school, and Ruby’s mother had insisted on picking her up in the car to go and buy some new ballet shoes, so Jack was all alone. It felt weird to be on the verge of another adventure and not have his two companions by his side. At least Snivel was still there.

      Except he wasn’t!

      When Jack reached the bench which was their usual meeting point, Snivel was nowhere to be seen. Jack sat down heavily and sighed.

      A moment or two later Snivel came tearing out of some bushes and bounded up to Jack.

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      “Sorry,” he said quickly, seeing Jack’s expression. “I thought I saw that robot squirrel of Bob’s …”

      Jack sat up. Both Bobs – the original GUNGE contact now known as Bad Bob, and New Bob – had used a robot squirrel as a surveillance device.

      “And did you?” he asked.

      Snivel shook his head. “Sorry,” he reported. “It was just a squirrel. So I chased it for appearance’s sake.”

      Jack started to tell Snivel about the Nit Nurse and his suspicions about her alien nature. Snivel nodded. “I’ll look it up.” Before Bad Bob had made his base disappear, Snivel had managed to download the complete GUNGE alien intelligence database. He accessed the database now and within a few moments he had an answer for Jack.

      “There’s one alien who totally fits the bill,” he announced. “It’s called the Sonomarshillian.”

      Jack jumped up. “That sounds likely. Sonomarshillian – Nurse Marsh. So what can you tell me about it?”

      Snivel started to rattle off the full data entry. “Sonomarshillian, inhabitant of a number of worlds in the Gamma Quadrant. Alien life-form that eats anything, but is particularly fond of small insects, such as fleas and head lice. The saliva of the Sonomarshillian contains an enzyme which has a marked soporific effect on most mammals. Creatures that are licked by the Sonomarshillian will become lethargic and lifeless. Repeated exposure to the enzyme in Sonomarshillian saliva can be fatal.”

      Jack paced up and down in front of Snivel. “That’s got to be it. That completely fits what’s happening here. She must be licking up the nits from kids’ heads and leaving them … dozy.”

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