Kidnap the Emperor!. Jay Garnet

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discretion for so long he never seemed to have any emotions at all. Professionally, he didn’t. His one passion was personal: he was an expert in the ecology of mountains above the tree line. Lodge – his grandparents were Poles from the city of Lodz – was quite a contrast: bluff, rotund, reassuring. He found it easy to ensure he was underestimated by rivals.

      Between the two on the glass-topped table was newly made coffee and orange juice. Sir Charles was standing, coffee cup in hand, having just outlined the approaches made to him by Yufru.

      He concluded by saying: ‘So you see, gentlemen, why we had to meet: I have the strongest possible reasons for believing that the Emperor is not dead. I further believe that unless we move rapidly and in concert, we shall shortly be presented with documents bearing the Emperor’s signature demanding the release of his fortune to the revolutionary government of Mengistu Haile Mariam.

      ‘This would be a financial blow that we, as individual bankers, should not have to endure. Indeed, the sums in gold alone are so vast that their release would devastate the world’s gold markets. While the short-term implications for our respective economies are not pleasant, the implications for our banks and ourselves as individuals are horrendous.’

      The Swiss was thoughtful, the American wide-eyed, caricaturing disbelief.

      ‘Oh, come on, Charlie,’ he said, ‘that’s got to be the most outrageous proposition I’ve ever heard. What are you on? I mean, my God.’

      Kupferbach broke in: ‘No, no, Jerry. It is not so foolish. It fits in. There have been a number of approaches in Zurich for loans. They need the money. But their propositions are unrealistic. The World Bank might consider a loan for fighting the famine, but, of course, it would be administered by World Bank officials. They don’t want that.’

      Lodge paused. ‘OK, OK,’ he said at last, ‘let’s follow it through. Suppose the old boy is still alive. Suppose he signs the papers. Don’t you think we could persuade the Ethiopians to leave the gold with us? After all, they have to place it somewhere, don’t they? We arrange a loan for them based on the reserves. They buy their arms and fight their goddam wars, and everyone’s happy. Hey?’

      ‘It’s possible,’ Cromer said slowly, ‘but it doesn’t look like a safe bet to me. You think Mengistu would pay interest, and if he did, do you think his successors would? Would you invest in a Marxist without any experience of international finance who came to power and preserves power through violence?’

      ‘I agree. But what do you think would happen if we received these documents and simply ignored them?’ replied Kupferbach.

      ‘Whadya mean, Ozzie?’ said Lodge. ‘We just don’t do as we’re told? We say we’re not going to hand over the funds? We tell the Ethiopians to go stuff their asses?’

      ‘In brief, meine Herren yes.’

      ‘If all this is true,’ said Cromer, ‘that thought must have already crossed their minds. In their position, what would your answer be?’

      ‘Right,’ Lodge said, jutting his lower jaw and biting his top lip. ‘Jesus, if I was them, I’d make one hell of a storm. Major banks refusing to honour their obligations? Yeah, they could really have a go at us. International Court at The Hague, questions in the UN, pressure on other African countries to make holes in Rothschild and Morgan Guaranty investments in the Third World. We’d come out of it with more than egg on our faces.’

      ‘Of course,’ added Cromer, ‘to do that, they’d have to reveal that Selassie was still alive. It would make them look pretty damn stupid.’

      ‘Yes, but they have less to lose.’ It was Kupferbach again, a clear thinker with a coolness that more than matched Cromer’s. ‘Mengistu could write off the previous announcement of the Emperor’s death as a necessity imposed by the revolution. The publicity would be bad for them, but could be catastrophic for us.’

      Cromer looked at the two of them in turn.

      ‘Gentlemen,’ he said, ‘I have been thinking of nothing else for the last two days. I have rehearsed these arguments many times in my own mind. If the Emperor signs those papers we are lost.’ He paused. ‘We are left with no choice – we have to assume the Emperor is still alive, and we have to get to him before he signs anything.’

      Cromer’s two colleagues looked at him expectantly.

      ‘What the hell are you suggesting?’ said Lodge.

      ‘We have to do the decent thing. We have to kidnap the Emperor.’

      They stared at him.

      Lodge shook his head in disbelief and went on shaking it, perhaps at the very suggestion, or perhaps at the impossibility of achieving it.

      ‘Jerry, Oswald: don’t fight it. It’s the only answer. It’s either that or immediate retirement. I don’t know about you two but I have a very real future in front of me. The Emperor has none. Getting him out, we win all ways. We save him, and we save his fortune – and ours.’

      ‘You goddam English,’ said Lodge. ‘You think you can still act like you had an Empire. Where I come from, the CIA do that sort of thing, not the goddam bankers…’ He trailed off, still shaking his head.

      Kupferbach seemed to be way ahead of him. ‘I see, Charles. You have been doing much preparation for this meeting. May I ask, therefore, why you needed to include us?’

      ‘For the first step, Oswald, the first step. Getting to Selassie. I think I know how to do it. We still have one card to play. Supposing he is still alive, supposing the Ethiopians make him sign the documents, supposing they are dated for just two days before we receive them, I still do not believe we would have to comply. We could argue that the signature must have been produced under duress, since it is clearly contrary to everything the Emperor has expressed in the past. I think we could make such a refusal stand up in a court of law. Of course, it would not do to let things go on that far. As you say, Oswald, the publicity would be catastrophic. But likewise, they would not get their money.

      ‘I think we can pre-empt a crisis. We tell them that signature under duress would not be acceptable, quoting UN Human Rights legislation. I also think I could suggest a way around the difficulty: I will propose that the signature be made in the presence either of the bankers concerned or of their duly appointed representatives, in a situation in which the Emperor could be seen – for that particular day, at least – to be in good health and not the object of undue pressure, physical or psychological.

      ‘That, gentlemen, is how we gain access.’

      ‘Hold on there a tiny minute,’ broke in Lodge, ‘you’re losing me. You mean this has to be done for real? We have to go and meet the Emperor?’

      ‘Well, not we necessarily, but yes, there has to be a meeting between our people and the Emperor. And there are, of course, a number of other implications. The Emperor will have to be in a fit state to hold such a meeting. But then, presumably, he has to be in a fit state to sign the documents at all, so it shouldn’t be too much of a problem to produce him in a reasonable state of health.

      ‘A further implication – and this is where I need you – is that the documents for signature have to be genuine. Only in that way can we guarantee access. We have to see what the Ethiopians want from Selassie, and we have to agree to them in advance. And Selassie will agree.’

      ‘Yeah?’ said Lodge,

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