until the storm subsided. Until everything was back to normal.
‘I didn’t think you’d come in until Monday,’ said Annika, peering over the tops of her computer glasses to look at Patrik. He had stopped in the doorway to her office, which was also the station’s reception area.
‘Erica threw me out. She claimed she was sick and tired of seeing my ugly mug at home.’ He attempted a laugh, but thoughts of the previous day were still with him, so the laugh didn’t reach his eyes.
‘I know exactly what she means,’ said Annika, but her expression was as melancholy as Patrik’s. The death of a child affected everyone. Since Annika and her husband Lennart had learned that they would soon be able to bring home their long-awaited adoptive child from China, she was even more sensitive when it came to children who were hurt or harmed in some way.
‘Is there anything going on?’ asked Patrik.
‘No, I wouldn’t say that. Just the usual. Old Mrs Strömberg has called for the third time this week to say that her son-in-law is trying to kill her. And a few kids were picked up for shoplifting at Hedemyr’s.’
‘Super busy, in other words.’
‘Right. The big topic of conversation at the moment is that we’ve received an invitation to come and sample all the wonders on offer at that new place – Badis.’
‘That sounds tempting. I reckon I should volunteer for that particular job.’
‘At any rate, it’s good to see the transformation Badis has undergone,’ said Annika. ‘The building used to look as if it might fall apart at any moment.’
‘Yes, it’s great. But I doubt it’s going to be profitable. It must have cost a fortune to restore the place. And do you think people will really want to go to a spa there?’
‘If not, Erling’s going to be in hot water. I have a friend who works for the local council, and she told me that they’ve invested a large part of their budget in the project.’
‘I can well imagine. And there’s a lot of buzz in Fjällbacka about the opening festivities that they’re planning. That’s not going to be cheap either.’
‘The whole police force is invited, in case you hadn’t heard. So we’re all going to have to put on our best clothes.’
‘Is everyone out?’ asked Patrik, changing the subject. He wasn’t particularly keen on getting dressed up for a fancy party.
‘Yes, except Mellberg. He’s probably in his office, as usual. Nothing has changed, even though he claims that he came back to work before his leave was over because the station was on the verge of falling apart without him. From what Paula told me, they were forced to find another childcare solution before Leo started on a career as a sumo wrestler. Apparently the last straw was when Rita came home early one day and found Bertil stuffing a load of hamburger into the blender for Leo. She went straight back to her job and asked her boss to let her work part-time for the next few months.’
‘You’re joking.’
‘No, it’s the gospel truth. So now we’re going to have to deal with him on a full-time basis. At least Ernst is happy about it. Mellberg left him here at the station while he was home with Leo, and the poor dog looked like he was pining away. He just lay in his basket and whined.’
‘Well, I suppose it’s good to know that nothing has changed,’ said Patrik. He headed for his office, taking a deep breath before he stepped inside. Maybe work would make him forget the sad events of the previous day.
She was never going to get up again. She would just lie here in bed and stare out of the window at the sky, which was sometimes blue, sometimes grey. For a moment she even wished that she was back in the hospital. Things had been so much simpler there. So calm and peaceful. Everyone had been so caring and considerate, speaking in low voices and helping her to eat and wash. Here at home there were too many noises disturbing her. She could hear the children playing, and their shouts reverberated through the house. Every once in a while they would come in to peer at her, their eyes big. It felt as if they were demanding something from her, as if they wanted something that she couldn’t give.
‘Anna, are you asleep?’
Dan’s voice. She would have liked to pretend that she was sleeping, but she knew he wouldn’t be fooled.
‘No.’
‘I’ve made you some food. Tomato soup with toast and goat’s cheese. I thought you might want to come downstairs to eat with us. The kids are asking for you.’
‘No.’
‘No, you don’t want to eat? Or no, you won’t come downstairs?’
Anna could hear the frustration in his voice, but she didn’t care. She didn’t care about anything any more. There was nothing but a huge empty space inside of her. No tears, no sorrow, no anger.
‘No.’
‘You have to eat. You have to …’ His voice broke, and he set the tray down on her bedside table with a bang, making some of the tomato soup slosh over the side of the bowl.
‘No.’
‘I lost a child too, Anna. And the kids lost a brother. We need you. We …’
She heard him searching for words. But in her head, there was room for only one word. A single word that had lodged inside of the emptiness. She looked away.
‘No.’
After a moment she heard Dan leave the room. She turned to look out of the window again.
It worried her that he seemed so distant.
‘My dear Sam.’ She cradled him in her arms, stroking his hair. He still hadn’t made a sound. It occurred to her that maybe she should have taken him to a doctor, but she quickly dismissed the idea. She wasn’t ready to let anyone else into their world yet. If he just had some peace and quiet, he would soon be himself again.
‘Do you want to take a little afternoon nap, sweetie?’
He didn’t answer, but she carried him to his bed and tucked him in. Then she made herself a pot of coffee, poured some into a cup along with some milk and went outside to sit on the dock, savouring the warmth of the sun on her face. Fredrik had loved the sun; in fact, he had worshipped it. He was always complaining about how cold it was in Sweden and how seldom the sun shone.
Why was she suddenly thinking about him? She had pushed all such thoughts to the back of her mind. He no longer had any place in their lives. Fredrik, with his constant demands and his need to have control over everything and everyone. Mostly over her – and Sam.
Out here on Gråskär there was no trace of him. He’d never been to the island; it was all hers. He had never wanted to come here. ‘I’ll be damned if I’m going to park myself on some fucking rock,’ he’d said the few times that she’d asked him. She was glad that he’d refused to come. The island hadn’t been sullied by his presence. It was a pure place that belonged only to her and Sam.
She wrapped her hands tightly around the coffee cup. The years had passed so swiftly. Time had flown by so fast, and in
