irked by the suggestion as she let herself into her office. Fortunately, it was gone five and Lisa had left so she was spared having to make small-talk with her secretary. She found her speech then sat down at her desk. There was a stack of letters in her tray for signing but she would deal with them after she had read through her speech. She wanted to be sure she was word perfect because it was important that she should put on a good show that night. She was Joanna Martin, Fellow of the Royal College of Surgeons, Head of Surgery at St Leonard’s Hospital, and that was something to be proud of. Whether or not her staff considered her to be paranoid or inhuman was neither here nor there.
Joann quickly read through the speech from start to finish but the words which had sounded so fluent and interesting that morning now sounded stilted and pompous. Panic hit her as she pictured herself standing up in front of the august gathering and watching them yawning with boredom. What on earth was she going to do? She couldn’t possibly hope to rewrite the whole speech at this late stage.
‘Sorry to bother you, Joanna, but I just wanted to tell you that Ada Harper is fine…Joanna? Are you OK?’
Joanna looked up when she heard Dylan’s voice. He was standing in the doorway to her office and the concern she could see on his handsome face suddenly made her want to cry.
‘I’m fine,’ she replied thickly, struggling to control herself. She couldn’t recall the last time she’d felt this emotional and it was hard to hold back her tears now.
‘Of course you’re not fine! That’s obvious so tell me what’s wrong. Maybe I can do something to help?’
His tone was even gentler now, gentle and persuasive and so wonderfully tempting that she longed to unburden herself, but how could she? How could she show any sign of weakness when she was supposed to be in charge of this department? It could undermine her credibility to such an extent that she might find it impossible to do her job. Then she would have to hand in her notice and start afresh somewhere else although it wouldn’t be easy because news travelled fast. It would be all round London that she hadn’t been able to cope and then, of course, people would say it was her own fault for aiming so high in the first place…
‘Hey, come on! Nothing can be that bad.’
She hadn’t realised that Dylan had crossed the room and nearly shot ten feet into the air when she felt his arm go around her shoulders. He bent so that their faces were level and her heart stumbled to a halt when she saw the tenderness in his eyes.
No man should be allowed to look at a woman like that, she thought dazedly. It gave him an unfair advantage because it made it impossible for her to think rationally. When a man looked at a woman the way Dylan was looking at her she became putty in his hands.
Joanna shrugged off his arm and pushed back her chair in one rapid movement that startled her as much as it startled him. She leapt to her feet and glared at him. ‘I have no idea what you think you’re doing, Dr Archer!’
‘I’m trying to find out what’s wrong and if I can help in any way. I thought that was obvious.’
His tone was clipped although the look on his face was so comical that Joanna experienced a sudden urge to laugh. Did he have any idea how stunned he looked at that moment? Of course not! He was the type of man who was normally in control of himself and the situation and it must be a rare event for him to find himself out of his depth like this.
The thought should have been comforting but for some reason it just served to knock her even further off balance. Joanna felt her insides quiver as she tried to deal with the thought that Dylan was as unsure about what was happening between them as she was. What had Tom said about Dylan making her behave like a human being? Well, it was true because he made her feel things that she’d never experienced before.
All of a sudden Joanna realised what dangerous ground she was on. She’d spent the whole of her adult life focusing on her work to such an extent that her emotional life had been neglected. Oh, she’d had the odd romantic liaison over the years but never anything serious. She hadn’t been prepared to put in the time or the effort it had needed to maintain a relationship when she’d had her career to consider.
The men she’d dated had soon tired of coming second to her job so for the past few years she had refused any invitations. It had seemed pointless going out on a date when she wasn’t interested in having a relationship with anyone, yet she realised with a sudden flash of insight that she would be interested if Dylan asked her out. The thought terrified her because she knew in her heart that there could be no compromises in that situation. It would be all or nothing if she got involved with a man like Dylan, and that was out of the question. She wasn’t prepared to sacrifice her career for love.
Dylan walked over to the door then turned and walked all the way back to the desk just to prove to himself that he was capable of making his limbs obey him. He felt a little better after he’d done it, more able to cope with making his mind listen to reason. If Joanna didn’t want his help then that was the end of the story.
Only it wouldn’t be the end because he would be forced to spend the rest of the night worrying about her, wouldn’t he?
He swore under his breath, wishing not for the first time that day that he’d never taken this wretched job. If he hadn’t taken it he would be carrying on as normal. He glanced at his watch and made a few rapid calculations. He should be on his way home by now and trying to decide nothing more stressful than which restaurant he would take the current woman in his life to for dinner. Once dinner was over they might either go on to a club or back to his flat depending on the stage they were at in their relationship, although lately it had been rare that he’d invited anyone to spend the night with him.
Dylan frowned when it struck him just how long it had been, in fact, since he’d slept with a woman. It wasn’t because of a lack of willing partners either, but he just wasn’t interested in casual sex nowadays. He wanted more from a relationship than a few hours of physical pleasure, things like closeness and commitment, a sense of them belonging together. Casual sex was a bit like scratching an itch—good while it lasted but quickly forgotten afterwards—and he wanted more than that. In fact, when he asked Joanna to spend the night with him it would be because they both knew they were making a commitment to each other.
The thought astounded him. He swung round and marched back to the door again then stood there while he took half a dozen deep breaths to clear his head. Putting the horse before the cart wasn’t in it! Commitment and Joanna Martin were two concepts which should never have been uttered in the same breath at this stage, so how come they had sneaked into his head?
He had no idea but what he did know was that he’d be in serious trouble if Joanna discovered what he’d been thinking. The last thing he could afford at this stage in his career was to be dismissed, yet it was a distinct possibility if she thought she was in danger of being compromised in any way.
Dylan called on all his resources before he turned to face her, and even then found his resolve wavering when he saw how upset she looked. He ached to comfort her but he forced himself to behave with decorum. Joanna was his boss and he was going to treat her as such even if it killed him—which it very well might!
‘Look, Joanna, I’m not trying to pry but if there is any way I can help you only need to say the word.’ He shrugged when she glanced up, hoping he looked suitably nonchalant. ‘The offer’s there but it’s up to you whether or not you accept it.’
‘I…um…Thank you. I appreciate your concern but everything is fine, I assure you.’
Dylan’s nostrils flared with impatience when he heard the distance in her
