Even though Cade was still her brother’s closest friend, there was only a little she knew about him.
When she rounded a bend in the road and his house disappeared from the view behind her, she let out her breath. With the check he had just given her, there was no way she could turn down his job offer, but it was going to hurt badly at times.
She still wasn’t over her losses completely, though the pain had eased somewhat. Losing her baby had been devastating and when Cade handed Amelia to her, she’d had a terrible clutch to her heart and felt tears sting her eyes. As she drove down the graveled, dusty ranch road, a pang still tore at her. She didn’t think she would ever stop hurting over losing her baby, even though it had been early in her pregnancy, and she knew that Amelia was going to be a constant reminder of what she had lost.
Now she had taken a job that was going to dredge up that pain again every day until she got accustomed to dealing with Amelia and could focus on her charge without thinking about her miscarriage. Amelia looked so adorable, she should bring cheer just by being a sweet baby.
Cade, however, might not be so easily handled. He loomed, another giant difficulty because of his incredible appeal. What might make working for him difficult was the chemistry between them. Where had that come from? She felt it and she knew he had. Or maybe he stirred that reaction in all the women he met.
Several times today, he had looked at her intently, giving her the look a man gives a woman when he actually sees her as an attractive woman. She wasn’t so out of practice that she didn’t recognize it.
It wouldn’t have mattered if he had spent the whole interview flirting with her. She didn’t want to date, didn’t want to fall in love, didn’t want any kind of relationship. The pain of her broken engagement was still too real, too intense. The consequences of any relationship would bring back too many hurtful memories.
She didn’t want to get involved emotionally with any man at this point in her life and definitely not Cade. She knew his views on relationships and his cynical view of marriage. She might not ever be able to have a baby, but she still wanted marriage and children in her future and that was not what Cade had ever wanted. If she could resist Cade’s appeal and deal with the hurt and reminders of her loss that Amelia would unknowingly cause, this job would be great. A huge windfall for her, and good experience for her future career. Cade’s offer had been irresistible. No way could she have turned it down.
Even though Erin tried to avoid thinking too much about her doctor’s warning that she might not ever be able to carry a baby full-term, it was impossible to forget. If she couldn’t bear a child, she would adopt. She would have a family, one way or another, but that would come in her future. Now she intended to concentrate on grad school and her career.
For a few months she would take care of a precious little girl. Amelia Callahan was a beautiful baby with lots of thick black curls and big dark blue eyes like her uncle. Erin remembered the few minutes when she held her and Amelia had stopped crying, looking into Erin’s eyes as if they were bonding.
And you bonded with her uncle, too.
She ignored the insinuating voice inside her head. She hadn’t bonded with Cade; she’d simply looked at him while he spoke to her. Yeah, and drowned in his eyes. And nearly ignited when he touched her.
Who was she kidding? Working for Cade was going to take difficult to new levels.
Living on the ranch, she could only hope Cade would be gone most of the day. It would make her job easier if he wasn’t around. She was going to love precious little Amelia and when December came, it would be dreadful to say goodbye.
In the meantime she’d simply avoid caring too much about Amelia’s appealing guardian.
* * *
On Monday Erin changed clothes several times, finally deciding on practical navy slacks, a short-sleeve matching cotton blouse with a round neckline and navy pumps. She brushed her hair and stood looking at herself until she realized she was thinking about how Cade would view her. She had to stop that. And she had to put a halt to the heart-pounding, prickly awareness of him that had plagued her all weekend.
Her apartment bell buzzed and she went to the intercom to hear her brother’s voice. “Am I too early?”
“No. I’m ready to go. Come up.”
She opened her apartment door and in minutes Luke swept into the room. “Hey, you look nice,” he said, studying her and then turning his eyes on her bags, laptop, carry-on and purse stacked near the door.
“Thanks, Luke, for helping me load my car.”
“Sure. I’m glad you’re doing this and I’m glad he’s paying you well. I figured he would.”
“The pay is fantastic. Now I don’t have to worry about school.”
“I still say, anytime you need anything or if you run short of money, let me know. I’m single, earning a good living and I’ll be happy to help you. You don’t have to pay me back, either—that’s the best part.”
She smiled at him. “The best part is that you made the offer. That gives me a secure feeling that I can always turn to you if something disastrous happens.”
“Damn straight. Speaking of something disastrous... Let me remind you again—”
“Luke,” she cautioned and laughed. “Don’t tell me to avoid going out with Cade. He never even noticed me until he wanted to hire me. He knows I’m your little sister and he won’t jeopardize his friendship with you. Now stop worrying about me.”
“I’m worrying about what Cade will do, although I don’t think he’ll hit on you for the reasons you just gave. I can promise that he notices you now. He didn’t when you were eight or nine years old, but...well, you look a lot different now. Let me remind you that while Cade loves the ladies, he is dead set against marriage. When it comes to long-term relationships, there’s not a serious bone in his body. He doesn’t know what a real family is—I know he always enjoyed being at our house partly because of our parents. He’s close with his brothers and his mother had good intentions, but she was more interested in a social life. What I’m saying is Cade is not your type and you don’t need another hurt.”
“Luke—”
“Be advised. I will come back from Antarctica and punch him out if he tries to date you,” he said, grinning at her.
She laughed, shaking her head and not taking him seriously. “No, you won’t. He’s your lifelong best friend. I think that covers it all. He knows how you feel and he knows I’m your little sister. I’m going to be the nanny. I’ll be with his grandmother and his little ward, but I won’t be with him. Frankly, I think he’s scared to take care of Amelia by himself and he doesn’t know how.”
“You’ve got that right. For once in his life he is terrified. He told me as much when I spoke to him. He doesn’t know anything about babies, even though he had younger brothers. They’re too close in age for him to have learned anything about babies. Oh, and speaking of his brothers... Little brother Gabe Callahan is single, closer to your age, likes to party and I imagine he’ll ask you out. And Gabe doesn’t take anything seriously—definitely not a relationship.”
“Duly noted,” she said, laughing at her brother. “If I get asked out, I can deal with that, and
