Well, she’d lost only part of the battle. She wasn’t going back to Nash’s place, but he was escorting her to her trailer. And she was almost positive he intended to spend the night.
A thrill shot through her, but would their cover be blown? He’d promised to be up and in the stables working before sunrise so he shouldn’t be spotted. She didn’t want him to think she was ashamed, far from it. Unfortunately, her reputation was always at stake and after the scandal from years ago, the press would love to see her “backslide” into bad girl mode. She refused to give them any fodder.
Nash knew of the sex video that had been leaked and he knew how sensitive she was about her privacy. Being a very private, secretive person himself only made their hidden affair the perfect setup. They’d been able to sneak around on the private grounds for months now.
Thankfully, the press wasn’t on-site because of the security who kept them outside the gates. Still, she worried. What if a member of the crew spotted them together? What if they leaked a story? She couldn’t endure another scandal, she just didn’t have the energy to fight it, and she wouldn’t put her mother through that again.
“Relax.” Nash squeezed her hand. “Nobody can see us. It’s dark.”
He was right. Nobody was around, but she was used to being in the loft of the stables where she was sure no one would see or hear them. Right now, walking across the Barringtons’ vast estate to head toward her on-site trailer, Lily just felt so exposed. Their footsteps were light and all was quiet except for an occasional frog croaking, a few crickets chirping and a horse neighing every now and then. They were utterly alone.
Before discovering the baby, Lily had wanted to talk to Nash about her feelings...feelings that had grown deeper than she’d expected. They’d both agreed that everything they shared was temporary and physical, but somewhere along the way her heart had gotten involved. She didn’t want to open up now or he’d probably think she was just trying to get a husband to go along with the baby to keep the gossip at bay.
With Nash’s rough fingers laced through hers, Lily had to admit she loved the Neanderthal routine when he’d gone all super protective of her. She’d known from the moment she met Nash that he was a man of power, of authority.
Her stepfather had been a man of power, too, waving his money around to get what he wanted. Nash was different, though. He was type A, without all the material possessions. He appealed to her on so many levels; she just wished they weren’t facing this life-altering commitment together when they barely knew each other.
Yes, they were compatible in bed—rather, in haylofts—but that didn’t mean in her realistic, chaotic world they would mesh well. Added to that, she didn’t know if she could handle having her passionate nature back in the public eye. Any serious relationship she took out in the open was subject to being exploited.
When they stepped into her trailer, Nash locked the door behind him. The cool air-conditioning greeted them. A small light from the tiny kitchenette had been left on, sending a soft glow throughout the narrow space.
Nash’s heavy-lidded eyes met hers. She knew that look, had seen it nearly every night in person, then again in her dreams later. He could make a woman forget all about reality, all about responsibility.
This was the first time he’d been in her trailer and she realized just how broad and dominating his presence truly was. A shiver of arousal slid through her.
“We really should talk about this,” she started, knowing she had lost control of this situation the moment she’d agreed to let him come back to her trailer. “I want you to know I didn’t trap you.”
“I know.” He closed the gap between them, barely brushing his chest against hers. “I also know that I want you. I wanted you before you broke the news and I still do. A baby doesn’t change the desire I have for you, Lily.”
Oh, mercy. When he said things like that, when he looked at her like that...how could a girl think straight? Just one look from beneath those heavy lids framed by dark lashes had her body reacting before he could even touch her. This was why they had to sneak around. No way could she be in public with this man when he looked at her like he was ready to eat her up, and she knew she had that same passionate gaze when she looked at him.
He smelled all masculine and rugged, and pure hardworking man. A man who was gentle with animals and demanding as a lover was pretty much her greatest fantasy come to life. A fantasy she hadn’t even known lived within her until she’d met Nash.
“Maybe we shouldn’t be doing this,” she stated as his fingertips slid up over her chest and started peeling away the elastic top of her dress. “I mean, we have a lot to talk about, right?”
Nash nodded, keeping his focus on his task. “We do, but right now you’re responding to my touch. I can’t ignore that. Can you?”
His gaze met and trapped hers. “Unless you’re ashamed to have the groom in your trailer.”
Lily reached up, squeezing both of his hands. “I’ve never, ever hinted that I’m ashamed of you, Nash. I’m just not normally a fling girl and whatever we have going on is nobody else’s business. That’s all. I’m not hiding anything else.”
A brief shadow crossed over his face and Lily wondered if she’d imagined it for a moment because just as fast as it came, it was gone.
“I can’t deny you,” she whispered. “How can this pull still be so strong?”
Nash dipped down, gliding his mouth over the curve of her neck, causing her head to fall back. The rasp of his beard against her bare skin always had tingles shooting all over her body. On occasion he’d trimmed his beard back, but thankfully he’d never fully shaved, because Lily figured she was ruined for smooth faces forever after being with Nash.
“Because passion is such a strong emotion,” he murmured as his lips trailed up her neck. “And what we have is too fierce to sum up in one word.”
In no time he’d yanked her dress down to pool at her feet. Lily kicked it aside as he quickly worked her free of her strapless bra and panties.
He reached behind his back and jerked his T-shirt up and over his head, tossing it to the side. Those chiseled muscles beneath a sprinkling of dark hair on his chest didn’t come from working out in some air-conditioned gym. Nash’s taut ripples came the old-fashioned way: from hours of manual labor.
“I love how you look at me,” he muttered as he lifted her from the waist and crossed to the end of the trailer with the bed.
He lay her down and stood over her, whipping his belt through the loops of his jeans. Lily didn’t know what on earth they were doing. Okay, she knew what they were doing, but wasn’t this a mistake? Shouldn’t they be discussing the baby? What their plans were for the future?
But when his weight settled over her, pushing her deeper into the thick comforter, Lily relished in the feel of his hard body molding perfectly with hers. Right here, this was the feeling she’d come to crave—the heaviness of him pressing into her in a protective, all-consuming manner.
Nash was right. Passion was such a simple word for the intensity of what they shared. But what label did it have? The impulse with which they’d jumped into an affair had overwhelmed them both. They’d never given anything beyond sex another thought.
The
