looking at him through eyes that had all but completely welled up. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me yet,” he warned her. “You can save that for when the case is finally over and we walk out of the courthouse victorious.”
She knew he was right. That this was far too early in the game to allow her emotions to get the better of her. Knew that they had a hard and very possibly long fight ahead of them.
But she couldn’t help herself. She’d felt alone and isolated for far too long.
And she had missed him.
In one unguarded moment, Lilli let her feelings bubble up and get the better of her. She threw her arms around his neck.
“Thank you,” she cried again, burying her face against his shoulder.
He felt her breath along his neck.
His stomach tightened in anticipation.
Chapter Four
Old feelings came rushing back to Kullen with the speed and intensity of a runaway freight train barreling down a steep mountain path. The urge to close his arms around Lilli, to kiss her with all his bottled-up passion nearly overwhelmed him.
It would be so easy to give in, to let his guard down just for the smallest moment and permit desire to take over.
But he knew he couldn’t let himself do that.
He’d been through this before and was well aware of just how the story had ended. There was absolutely no way he would allow himself to be ripped apart again. Once was more than enough.
Once was a case of being blindsided. Twice would have meant that he was either an idiot—or a masochist. And he was neither. Moreover, he intended to remain that way. So although his heart was racing now, calling him seven kinds of a fool for not taking advantage of this opportunity shimmering before him, Kullen kept his arms rigidly at his side.
Embarrassed, feeling both self-conscious and extremely awkward, Lilli withdrew her arms and took a step back. Kullen all but radiated coldness. She succeeded in maintaining a smile on her lips, although how she was doing so was a mystery to her.
“Sorry,” she murmured. “I guess I got a little overwhelmed for a second. It won’t happen again.”
“Nothing to be sorry about,” he told her, doing his best to sound natural. Doing his best not to demand why she’d left him the way she had and then run headlong into an intimate relationship with someone else.
Someone who he knew couldn’t have loved her half as much as he had.
Kullen took a breath, then said, “Stop at Selma’s desk and ask her to give you a list of documents I’m going to need to see for this case. It’s a standard list,” he explained before she could ask how the administrative assistant would know what to give her. “Just tell her it’s a custody dispute.”
Dispute. What a civilized word for what was about to take place, Lilli thought.
“Selma’s the woman at the front desk?” she asked just to be certain.
Kullen nodded. “Can’t miss her. She looks like the last living cast member from the set of The Wizard of Oz,” he said tactfully.
It was an apt description of the woman, Lilli thought as she turned toward the door. The administrative assistant did look a great deal like an aged Munchkin. “When do you want to see me again?” she asked Kullen.
I never stopped wanting to see you, he told her silently. With effort, he forced himself to focus on more neutral terrain. He should only think of her in light of the actual business they had with one another. Nothing more.
Turning the calendar on his desk toward him, Kullen glanced at several consecutive pages. As near as he could tell, they were filled. It didn’t matter. He’d find a way to make time for her.
Pushing the calendar away, he turned to face her. “Whenever’s convenient for you.”
The word convenient didn’t fit the situation. There was nothing convenient about it. “Mrs. Dalton got the court to accelerate the date, so as soon as possible would be very much appreciated.” She eyed him hopefully. “I can come back with the papers later this afternoon if you like.”
He would have liked to say yes, but he couldn’t. “I’m leaving for court in half an hour.” And more than likely would be there for the rest of the day, until the judge adjourned the proceedings.
Lilli didn’t allow obstacles to deter her, not anymore. She’d learned that along the way as she carved out a living for herself and her son. The meek and mild were stepped on, the forceful were not.
“All right, then I can drop the documents off at your place tonight,” she suggested. “I know it sounds like I’m being pushy, but I’ll feel a lot better the sooner you have all the ammunition you need at your disposal.” And then she realized that she’d overlooked an important, salient point. “Unless your wife doesn’t like work from the office showing up on your doorstep at night.”
“No wife.”
The disclaimer was out of his mouth before he realized that he had just ruined his one opportunity to keep her permanently at arm’s length. If Lilli thought he was married, she would keep her distance. She wasn’t some femme fatale, given to whimsical flirting. There wouldn’t be any more impromptu incidents of her throwing her arms around his neck. Lilli was honorable that way.
How the hell did he really know what she was like, he silently demanded the next moment, growing irritable. He hadn’t been right about her the first time around. Eight years ago he would have bet his last dime—and his life—that Lilli wasn’t the type to vanish without a word, especially after someone had bared his soul to her.
He would have lost that bet.
For all he knew, the challenge of prying a man away from his wife would spur Lilli on.
I really didn’t know you at all, did I? he thought, looking at her.
“You’re not married?” Lilli asked, surprised. Someone like Kullen should have gotten snapped up years ago. He was one of the few true good guys left in the world. They didn’t make men like him anymore. If she hadn’t discovered that she was pregnant the same evening that he’d proposed, she would have gladly married him and spent the rest of her life trying to put that one awful episode in her life behind her.
Don’t go there, she warned herself. What’s done is done.
“No,” he answered, “I’m not married.”
“Oh.”
Despite the fact that it was years too late for her, that what could have been between them was in the past, Lilli was suddenly aware of a small, intense flame of warmth igniting within her. A warmth that swiftly spread, as if to thaw her out. To make her feel alive again.
This wouldn’t accomplish anything, she upbraided herself. It was best to leave things just the way they were. There was no going
