next to Will and Adrienne’s new place on the Upper West Side. Rounding off the crowd was Wade, one of Will and Alex’s friends from Yale and Alex’s former business partner, and Jack, an editor for one of the big New York publishing houses. Apparently he had worked with Will at the paper a few years back.
It was a blur of names and faces that Gwen would forget the minute the next name was called. She’d blame her short-term memory loss on the pregnancy—it was easy to label almost anything as a symptom of her condition—but the truth of the matter was that she was simply bad with names. At work, it was easy. All the staff had name tags, and all the patients had their names on a plaque outside their door or a clipboard hanging at the foot of their bed.
When the introductions were finished, she decided her time standing in the sun was over. It had felt good at first, but now she was a minute or two from starting to burn. Taking her glass of iced tea, Gwen returned to the shade of the pergola and sat down on one of the cushioned Adirondack chairs.
Leaning back into the cool comfort of her chair, she instantly felt better. Thank goodness she wasn’t full-term in the heat of the summer. Gwen wasn’t sure she could bear that. Her apartment didn’t have central air, just a small unit in the bedroom window. Most of the time she was cold natured and it suited her fine, but she’d had fire running through her veins the last few months.
Taking a refreshing sip of the sweet tea she’d brewed earlier, she watched the men gather around the grill. Apparently millionaires could run companies and build empires, but outdoor cooking was a challenge. She watched Alex open the cabinet beneath it and make some adjustments to the propane line. A few minutes later, a roar of success sounded from the group.
“We have fire!” the editor guy—Jack?—shouted triumphantly.
Adrienne patted them all on the back and headed toward the house. “I’m off to prepare the meat,” she said with a smile as she slipped inside.
Sabine with the purple hair quickly grew bored with the sight of an operating gas grill and came to sit in the shade with Gwen. They hadn’t spoken much since she’d arrived. She was sure the woman was perfectly nice—Adrienne was a good judge of people—but Gwen just didn’t know what they had in common to discuss.
“When are you due?” Sabine asked before taking a sip from her beer.
“Mid-October,” Gwen said, although watching the other woman made her think the day couldn’t come soon enough. Of all the lifestyle changes she’d had to make, the hardest had been giving up her favorite beer. She didn’t drink much, but there was just something soothing about popping the top on a cold one after a long shift, plopping onto the couch and watching a few hours of reality television on her DVR.
“My son will be two in October, so I understand where you’re at. Do you know what you’re having yet?”
Gwen tried not to look too surprised to learn Sabine was a mother. Imagining her own mother with purple hair was just impossible. “A little girl. I had the ultrasound last week.”
Susan and Robert had been over the moon in the doctor’s office. It was hard to see the fuzzy image on the screen from her vantage point, but she tried not to be too disappointed. This was their baby after all, not hers. They did give her a copy of the latest ultrasound picture to show off. Unfortunately, it was in her purse on her bed when she needed it.
“Do you have any names picked out yet?”
The more pregnant Gwen became, the more of these questions she had to field. It had been easy when no one could tell she was pregnant. Now, unless it was just a quick comment from a stranger on the subway, it was best to tell them about her situation before they pressed on.
“No, actually, I’m a surrogate, so the baby technically isn’t mine to name. I think her parents are considering Caroline Joy and Abigail Rose. Every time I talk to them they’ve changed it again. For now I just call her Peanut, because that’s what she looked like on the first sonogram.”
Sabine’s eyes had grown wider as Gwen talked. Apparently dropping a detail like that and carrying on without pause had thrown her off her guard. “A surrogate? Wow. I don’t think I could ever do that,” she finally said.
“Why is that?”
“Being pregnant is such a life-changing experience. Whether or not the child is yours, you’re going to bond with it. To go through months with that baby inside you and then to give it away … I just couldn’t do it.”
Gwen tried not to frown at Sabine. She probably didn’t realize how her words would affect her. But they struck a chord. Gwen had never been interested in having a family of her own. She’d spent too much of her childhood being pushed aside by her mother when a new man came into her life. She wasn’t about to do that to a child of her own. Acting as a surrogate seemed like an intriguing opportunity. Since she’d never thought she’d have kids, she’d never thought she would experience pregnancy.
Never once did she consider that she’d form an emotional attachment to another person’s child. But Sabine was right. She’d underestimated what it was like to have life growing inside her. The moment she’d felt the first flutter in her stomach, Peanut had become a real person to her. She’d gotten in the habit of talking to the baby when she was alone in her apartment. She was the one who helped Gwen pick out what she would have for lunch. The silent child had become her main companion when her crowd of bar-hopping friends didn’t know how to act around her anymore.
Gwen hadn’t really realized it until that moment, but she had bonded with the baby. With four more months to go, how much worse would it get? She didn’t even want to think about it. She was too prone to getting emotional lately.
Confused, she turned away from Sabine and found Alex watching her from across the patio. He was leaning casually against one of the white wooden posts, while either Jack or Wade, she couldn’t be sure, talked to him. But he wasn’t looking at them or even pretending to. He was looking at her. There was an intensity in his hazel eyes, but there was something different there than the desire he’d directed at her in the past. It almost felt like admiration, although she had no idea why Alex would look at her that way. She was pregnant, broke and overworked. That was no condition to admire.
“He is one sexy piece of man,” Sabine commented, still oblivious to the effect her words had on Gwen.
The comment startled Gwen into turning back to the woman beside her. Sabine’s gaze was focused exactly in Alex’s direction. Gwen had no claim to him, but the thought of him and Sabine together brought on a surge of jealousy that chased away the last of her confusing emotions. She opted to play dumb. “Who? Wade?”
“No, the guy who came late. Alex.”
“Ahh,” Gwen said, not trusting herself to comment further without sounding either bitter or jealous to the other woman’s ears.
“Pity for me, but I think he’s into you.”
That perked Gwen’s attention. Her head snapped toward him, but he had returned to his conversation. “Why would you say that?”
“Because he keeps watching you.”
“Maybe I’m just funny-looking.” She sighed.
“Nope,” Sabine said with certainty. “When you’re not watching, he’s looking at you like you’re the sweetest strawberry tart in the bakery window. He definitely wants a taste.”
