Luke tensed as the talk turned to his marriage and that unhappy time of his life. Meg wasn’t the only one who had a romantic life full of regrets she’d rather not dwell on—he had made his share of mistakes in that arena, too, that could not be undone. Like Meg, Luke thought, all he could do was move on. “Gwyneth died two years ago, in a car crash,” he said quietly.
“I’m sorry.” Shock filling her eyes, Meg laid a slender hand across her breasts and sucked in a breath. “Was anyone else hurt in the accident?”
Luke grimaced, working hard to keep his emotions at bay. This was one area of his life he didn’t want to talk about, even with Meg. “She was alone when it happened,” he said tersely.
“It must have been very tough for you all,” Meg said compassionately.
Luke nodded. That was the understatement of the century. In many ways he was still grappling with the circumstances surrounding Gwyneth’s death.
“Where are your three little girls now?” Meg asked, abruptly looking and acting very much like the nurse/natural healer she was professionally.
“With John and Lilah McCabe,” Luke explained as Meg knelt next to the freshly sanded park bench. “We’ve been staying at their ranch the past couple of days, while I closed on the house, got acquainted with the hospital and had the utilities turned on here.”
Meg opened a can of primer and began applying it to the wooden slats with slow, even brush strokes. Looking relieved to talk about something other than herself and her son, Meg glanced over at Luke. “How old are they?”
Appreciating the genuine interest and understanding in Meg’s eyes, Luke dropped to the grass beside Meg and got comfortable. He knew he should feel relieved Jeremy wasn’t his son after all—he had his hands full just trying to bring up his three daughters—but he found himself wishing he were Jeremy’s father. He wanted that link to Meg. He wanted an irrefutable reason for them to start over and forge a relationship again.
“Susie is five. She’s all sunshine and storms. Everything is either truly wonderful or a complete disaster. Becca is four. She’s the negotiator of the family and is always trying to strike a deal or make things better for everyone. Amy is three, and she has a very mellow personality. Cooperation is her motto.”
Meg slanted him a glance, beginning to relax even more as the talk stayed on what were, for her, safer subjects. “Sounds like you have your hands full,” she said admiringly.
Luke breathed in the familiar fragrance of Meg’s cinnamon perfume as it mingled with the soap-and-water freshness of her skin. “I do.”
“Do you have help?”
Luke watched the capable movements of her slender hands, unable to help but recall how those same hands had felt sliding over his skin. “In California I had a housekeeper and a retired nurse, who worked as their nanny.”
“Neither came with you?” Finished with the seat, Meg stood and began working on the rest of the bench.
Loathing the deliberate way she held him at arm’s length, Luke shook his head. “Both have family there and didn’t want to move.” As much as he hated to lose them, he understood. He hadn’t just taken the job in Laramie because he’d learned about Jeremy and thought—hoped—he and Meg had a child together that she’d been too afraid to tell him about. He’d come back to Texas for good, this time, because he needed to be closer to his Texas roots. And even though he’d grown up in Houston, next to the oil refinery where his dad had worked, Laramie was such a warm and friendly town it already felt like home.
Meg lifted a brow. “Are you going to hire a nanny here?”
Aware she was gauging his reply carefully, Luke shook his head, his glance tracking the swell of her breasts, pushing against her blouse, and the graceful shape of her bare arms. “I’m planning to put them in the employee day care center over at the hospital,” he replied. “That way I can check on them several times a day and go down and have lunch with them. If they ever need me, I’ll be right there on the premises. When Susie starts kindergarten in the fall, she’ll remain in the center’s before-and-after-school program.”
Blissfully unaware of the effect her close proximity was having on him, Meg swiveled around to look at him with a mixture of empathy and approval. “Jeremy is enrolled there, too,” she said, regarding him, one concerned parent to another. “He really likes it.”
Trying hard not to notice the snug way her shorts stretched over the delectable curves, Luke stood and shifted in a way to ease the growing pressure at the front of his jeans. “Looks like our kids will really be getting to know each other,” he said, glad to know she cared about her son as much as he cared about his daughters. Even if she wasn’t yet doing right by her son’s father, whoever he was.
“I guess so.” Meg smiled at him helpfully, comfortable now that she’d finally decided on a role for them to play, that of emotionally uninvolved neighbors. “Is there anything I can do for you? Maybe make some lunch for you and the girls and bring it over later?”
Luke nodded. He knew what Meg was doing. Falling back into the familiar role of gracious Texas lady while keeping him at arm’s length. She might not know it yet, but this was only a starting place. Although where it would end up, given Meg’s wariness where he was concerned, was yet to be seen. “That would be great,” he said, smiling, too.
Finished, Meg put aside her brush and slapped the lid back on the can of primer. She smiled at him like the “good neighbor and no more” she intended to be. Luke felt his hopes for a quickly resumed friendship fading fast. “Do they like macaroni and cheese?” she asked with a politeness that grated.
Luke nodded, aware this was not working out anywhere near as well as he had hoped. Meg wouldn’t use their kids as an excuse to get close again. She’d use them like a perpetual shield, to keep them apart.
“Mac ’n’ cheese is their favorite,” Luke said. The moving truck drove up and parked in front of the big house next door. “I’d better go,” Luke said reluctantly.
Meg nodded. “I’ll see you later.”
AS MEG EXPECTED, her five-and-a-half-year-old son, Jeremy, was deliriously excited by the sight of such a big truck. She was glad to see it, too, relieved to end her time alone with Luke. She had known he would catch up with her eventually. She had even guessed he would ask about Jeremy’s paternity the first chance he got.
What she hadn’t imagined was how hard it would be for her to be evasive.
Even now, knowing there was no way they could go back and right the wrongs and rewrite the past, she wanted to tell him everything that had happened. And why. If she knew for certain he would understand why she’d done what she had, maybe there’d be a chance for them to be close again. At the very least, caring friends. But life came with no such guarantees.
And that being the case, Meg decided, she couldn’t risk her son being hurt by any mistakes she made. Jeremy had struggled enough, growing up without a father in his life, and didn’t need his life turned upside down now. Maybe she hadn’t been able to give Jeremy a father, but she’d given him everything else—a home, family, security and lots of love. She wasn’t going to risk that being taken away from him.
“Can I go out and watch the movers unload the van?” Jeremy asked as he finished his favorite breakfast
