Paul reached for Lilly’s paperwork and made some notations. “You feel strongly now, which is understandable. That may change, however, when you talk to the baby’s father.”
Jake!
Lilly had been so busy the last few days denying the possibility of pregnancy, she hadn’t considered what to tell him. Admitting her condition would be bad enough, especially when she’d assured him she’d been using birth control. Admitting the fact that their baby could be born deformed—if she even carried to term—was unimaginable. And grossly unfair to Jake. She knew firsthand the difficulties and potential agony facing them. He didn’t. Worse, she was taking away his choice in the matter by choosing to have the baby regardless of his feelings.
“I can’t tell him.” She swallowed another sob. “Not yet.”
“I’m your physician,” Dr. Paul said. “It’s not my place to advise you on personal matters. But as the father, he does have a right to know about the baby.”
For one wild second, Lilly contemplated hiding her pregnancy from Jake. Then she remembered her agreement to accompany the center’s clients on their visits to Bear Creek Ranch. He was no stranger to pregnant women and no dummy. He’d eventually figure out her condition and realize he was the father.
“I need some time before I make any announcements.” There was so much to consider. Her job. Her family. The expenses not covered by her health insurance. Astronomical medical bills had also contributed greatly to her marital problems with her ex-husband.
And then there was Jake.
Lilly started to rise. Her unsteady legs refused to support her, and she immediately dropped back into the chair.
“That’s a good idea. And do think about the tests. I would be remiss in my duties if I didn’t advise you to have them.” Dr. Paul handed Lilly several sheets of paper. “Take these to the front desk. The nurse will call in your prescription for prenatal vitamins.”
“Thank you.” Lilly tried again to stand and managed it this time.
“Since you’re a high-risk pregnancy, I’d like to see you every two weeks if your schedule allows it.”
Lilly nodded and stumbled out of Dr. Paul’s office. She paid her bill, scheduled her next appointment and gave the nurse the name and phone number of her pharmacy, all in a daze. The ground blurred on her walk across the parking lot to her car. She was barely aware of the return drive to the center and was surprised to find herself parked in her reserved space.
Sitting behind the steering wheel, she waited before leaving the car. Carefully, as if the slightest touch might harm the life growing inside her, she rested a hand on her abdomen.
Another baby. The last thing in the world she wanted, and, at the same time, the one thing she wanted with a longing that bordered on desperation.
A tiny seed of hope took root inside her. Was Dr. Paul right? Would this baby be born normal because the father was someone different? The tiny seed anchored itself more securely and began to blossom, filling Lilly with something she hadn’t felt since her first pregnancy.
Joy.
A smile curved the corners of her mouth. The sigh escaping her lips was one of contentment, not despair. With a sense of elation, she opened the door and stepped out of the car.
She’d done no more than place one foot on the asphalt when the first cramp hit. The second was so severe, Lilly doubled over. Her breath came in spurts.
“Oh, God,” she cried to herself. “Not again.” Then, in a whisper, she pleaded, “Please don’t take this baby from me, too.”
Chapter Four
Jake looked up just as the beam from a pair of headlights cut across his kitchen window. Ellen was dropping off the girls for their regular Wednesday-night dinner—late as usual. He didn’t have to worry that she’d come inside. His ex-wife avoided him if at all possible these days, for which he was grateful.
He’d no sooner taken dinner from the oven than the girls tumbled through the back door. In the next instant, their lively antics filled the room, and Jake’s loneliness vanished.
“Cheese pizza!” LeAnne shouted and ran immediately to the table, where Jake had set out paper plates and napkins.
“What? No hug?”
His youngest fled the chair she’d been ready to occupy and bounded into his arms. At seven, she was mostly arms and legs and long auburn hair that refused to stay out of her face. Briana and his middle daughter, Kayla, quickly followed suit.
Jake cherished his girls and had bent over backward to preserve his relationship with them during his divorce from their mother. At the time, it had rankled to give in to Ellen’s outrageous demands, especially since she’d cheated on him, not the other way around. Now he was relieved that Ellen was unable to engage him in her petty power plays.
“Who else besides LeAnne is hungry?” Jake reluctantly released his children.
“Me.” Kayla scrambled to beat her sisters to the table.
Jake cut the pizza into slices and served it. He wasn’t much of a cook, usually taking his meals with either employees or guests in the spacious dining hall. After the divorce, he’d learned to prepare simple meals for himself and his daughters. Kayla and Briana were both picky eaters—Kayla hated vegetables and Briana didn’t eat meat—which made the task a daunting one at times.
“How’s school?” he asked once they were all seated.
His question earned him a round of frowns and one dismal head shake.
“You always ask the same thing,” LeAnne objected.
“I’m interested.” Jake washed his pizza down with a glass of fruit punch, something the younger girls loved and he tolerated.
“Mom’s taking me into Payson tomorrow after school to get my learner’s permit.”
At Briana’s announcement, Jake choked. He’d known this day was coming but it still took him by surprise. “Driving? You’re only fifteen!”
“Fifteen and seven months. Which is when I can legally get my permit.”
“Can I ride with Briana?” Kayla piped up.
“Absolutely not.” Jake massaged a throbbing temple. When had his baby girl become old enough to drive? “Maybe I should go with you.”
“It’s all right. You don’t have to.”
Briana was being too blasé, a sure sign of something amiss. “I want to go,” he said, applying pressure with the skill of an experienced parent. “It’s a big day for you.”
“What about work?” Panic widened her eyes.
Eyes, he suddenly noticed, made to look larger by mascara, their lids faintly tinted with blue shadow. He didn’t recall giving Briana permission to wear makeup. Obviously, her mother hadn’t seen the need to consult him on the matter.
“I’ll
