confidence until Paige was a walking case of nerves. Sometimes she’d break out in hives just from the stress.
Looking back, he realized there’d been so many options open to them other than listening to Mrs. Carstairs, but at the time they hadn’t seen them. Jude could’ve gone to his mother and she would’ve been happy to help them. But talking was not Jude’s strong suit. He almost would have rather died than tell his mother how he’d screwed up. He was to blame for everything that had happened and he fully carried that blame on his shoulders. If he had spoken up, things would’ve been different. But he hadn’t known how Paige would’ve reacted if he’d asked her to marry him and give up her dream. He couldn’t do that, pressure her to stay in a town that held so many bad memories. She deserved to fulfill her dream more than anyone he’d ever known. He’d made sure she did. Whatever had happened in the intervening years, he hoped with all his heart she was happy and had a full life.
He drove toward the Horseshoe cemetery, ready to face his past.
* * *
THE APRIL WIND howled through the tall cedars of Horseshoe’s country cemetery. Paige shivered and reached for Staci’s hand. The ominous sound was a fitting lullaby for a woman who had been troubled most of her life. The noise would carry on into the hereafter.
They didn’t shed tears. There were too many teardrops on their souls to pretend any grief now. Sadness, yes. Paige was sure it showed on their solemn faces as they said goodbye to a mother they’d never understood.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a silver SUV pull into the cemetery driveway. Angie Wiznowski and Rachel Hollister got out. They were older, but Paige recognized them, girls she had gone to high school with. Rachel was as beautiful as ever with her blond hair and blue eyes. She was pregnant. A pain shot through Paige but she quickly disguised it. Angie had changed the most. She’d always been sweet and nice but she was positively glowing. What were they doing here?
More cars turned into the cemetery. Angie’s mom and Angie’s sisters and brother had come. The sheriff and his wife arrived, as did Hardy Hollister, the DA, and Judge Hollister. Mrs. Peabody and the older ladies of the town came. Some of Paige’s teachers also came. Some of Staci’s and Luke’s friends showed up. The people of Horseshoe offered their condolences and Paige was overwhelmed with a nostalgic feeling for a town she’d left behind.
As everyone stood around the grave site, the man from the funeral home read some verses from the Bible and the casket was lowered into the ground. A turbulent life was over.
Angie hugged her. “We’re so sorry for your loss.”
“Thank you,” she managed.
Rachel hugged her, too. “It’s so good to see you and you look absolutely wonderful. I guess the California good life agrees with you.”
Paige didn’t know how to answer. If they only knew. But they never would, because Paige would never open up with all the heartache and pain she’d suffered in the past years.
After everyone had left, Angie and Rachel lingered and they talked about Horseshoe and things that had happened while Paige had been gone. Angie was married to Hardy Hollister, Rachel’s brother, which Paige had guessed by the way Hardy had hugged Angie. They had two children. Rachel had married Egan, Jude’s older brother. That caught Paige’s attention. She’d never known Rachel liked the Rebel boys. She seemed happy, as did Angie. Paige would never have that kind of happiness. She had destroyed her one chance at love.
“We have company,” Rachel said as a pickup pulled up behind the SUV.
Angie hugged her one more time. “Come by the bakery before you leave and we can catch up on old times and hear about your amazing career.” Angie’s family owned the local bakery, a favorite hangout and the busiest place in town.
Paige didn’t say anything, because she didn’t plan on taking Angie up on her offer. She wouldn’t talk about her life to anyone. She’d opened up last night to Staci and Luke because she had to tell them. She couldn’t keep lying and holding everything inside. As family members who had been through hell with her, they understood. But the people of Horseshoe wouldn’t, even friends like Angie and Rachel.
They walked away and Paige stared at the man getting out of the truck. Her breath caught and her body trembled as she stared at the boy who was now a man. The boy she’d loved more than anyone in her life.
He walked toward them with long strides. He’d changed, was her first thought. The skinny boy had filled out and his shoulders were wide and muscled. But his beautiful face, carved with the touch of an angel, was the same: dark eyes flanked by incredible eyelashes and lean structured facial bones that bespoke pure masculinity. He’d been a cowboy then and she was delighted to see he was still in boots, a Stetson and snug Wranglers. From out of nowhere a memory flashed through her mind of a lazy afternoon and her unzipping them. She was suddenly warm all over.
Luke met him and they shook hands. Paige couldn’t hear what they were saying, but soon Jude walked toward her.
She said the first thing that came into her head. “Hey, Jude.” It was the title of an old Beatles song that had been their favorite back then. They’d played it over and over just to sing “Hey, Jude.”
He didn’t smile, and a foreboding feeling came over her. “I’m sorry about your mom.”
“Th-thank y-you.” She stumbled over the words like a teenager. “I was going to call before I left town.”
“Could we go somewhere and talk?” He looked around at the tombstones and graves nestled among stately cedars. “Someplace besides here?”
“Sure. I can use Staci’s car. Where would you like to meet?”
“They redid the park that’s two blocks from your old house. It’s nice and we could meet there.”
“Okay. I’ll see you in about thirty minutes.”
He nodded and strolled back toward his truck.
They were cordial and polite like strangers, but they had been so much more.
“What did he want?” Staci asked.
“Just to talk.”
“You don’t have to do that if you don’t want to,” Luke told her. “It might be best to let it go.”
“I can’t. I have to know if he thinks about our child all the time...like...I do.”
“Oh, Paige.” She didn’t even know she was shaking until Staci put her arms around her.
“I didn’t think it would be this hard to see him.” She brushed away an errant tear. “He didn’t even smile when I said, ‘Hey, Jude.’ It was our favorite song.”
“Do you still love him?”
She didn’t know, but she knew what the nausea was about. Jude. Seeing him again. And having to talk about that time and what they’d done. They had to drag out all the dirty laundry to see if it could be cleansed or if the stains of life’s mistakes would haunt her forever.
Jude parked
