but the place she shared with Loukas seemed almost welcome. Even better was the prospect of shedding her clothes and slipping into bed to sleep.
If she could just erase the vivid images portrayed on screen during the evening. If she had been alone in her apartment, she would have watched a DVD and lost herself in a light comedy until sheer tiredness forced her into bed.
Except she was no longer alone.
There was a part of her that wanted to become lost in the seductive touch of a man. To be held close and feel the trail of his lips as he explored her body. Experience the joy of intimacy without the fear of cruelty.
Not just any man … Loukas.
If she’d wanted an affair to expunge unwanted memories, she would have sought one by now.
Dammit, what was she waiting for?
Love?
Oh, please. The emotion only existed for such a brief period of time in the real world … didn’t it?
The kind that changed lives and lasted a lifetime, one man for one woman, twin souls meant only for each other … that was a beautiful fantasy with little basis in reality.
Since when had she become so cynical?
A hollow laugh rose and died in her throat, for she could pinpoint the date, the time almost to the minute.
The car turned off the New South Head Road into Point Piper, and reached the magnificent set of gates guarding the entrance to Loukas’ mansion.
A modem released the gates and simultaneously lit the curved driveway as he eased the Aston Martin towards the garage.
A sense of restlessness invaded her body as she ascended the stairs … a feeling she attempted to dismiss without much success on entering the master suite.
She became extremely conscious of Loukas’ presence as he shed his jacket, then loosened his bow tie.
Smooth easy movements that were uncontrived as he moved to free the buttons on his dress shirt … and she focused on discarding her evening shoes, her jewellery.
All the time she was acutely aware of him … the faint thud as he removed his shoes; the almost undetectable slide of a zip fastening and the soft slither of material as he freed trousers.
The image of his tall, near-naked frame was hauntingly vivid. Hell, she had no problem visualizing the impressive breadth of his shoulders, the superb musculature tapering to a sculptured waist and lean hips.
Would there ever be a time when she could feel sufficiently confident to seduce him? Boldly explore and tease until he groaned beneath her touch?
To have him reach for her in the night and gift him the freedom of her body … to exult in untold pleasure?
She drew in a ragged breath, then released it slowly. Oh, for heaven’s sake … stop.
Get rid of the dress, gather up your sleepwear, escape to your en suite, remove make-up, brush teeth, fix hair into a ponytail … then go to bed.
She did all that and re-entered the bedroom to find Loukas stretched comfortably beneath the covers, arms crossed pillowing his head.
‘Goodnight.’ Her voice sounded slightly strangled even to her own ears as she slid between the sheets and he doused the lights.
‘Sleep well.’
As if that were going to happen any time soon.
Perhaps if she lay perfectly still and conjured only pleasant thoughts …
Except nothing helped, and her thoughts assumed a kaleidoscopic mix that subdued the colours and brought Seth’s image into stark black and white focus.
Go away. A silent entreaty, harsh only in her mind, had no effect whatsoever.
There was a need to remain awake, for at least then she retained a measure of control. If she slid into sleep all control would be lost and his image would emerge to haunt her as it had too frequently in the past.
She needed to win … she had to.
Yet slipping from her bed and joining Loukas in his took more courage than she possessed, for what if he mistook her for a former flame … or, worse, he rejected her?
So much for that plan.
Afterwards Alesha had no memory of when her subconscious led unerringly into the familiar nightmare. She only knew she was fighting to escape … crying out as she shielded her face from the stinging slaps, the harsh bite of cruel hands pinning her down, the sound of her name on his lips.
Then she came sharply awake to a room flooded with light … a room different from the one she’d occupied in her mind, and the man leaning close to her wasn’t Seth.
It took one brief horrifying moment to shake free of the starkly intrusive images, and she was barely conscious of the concern evident in the dark eyes of the man watching the range of fleeting emotions chase her expressive features before she gained the control to mask them.
Loukas lifted a hand, saw her eyes flare with sudden fear, and swallowed the curse that rose to his lips as he smoothed a wayward lock of hair behind her ear, then let his hand trail along her jaw to cup her chin and press a thumb to her quivering mouth.
There seemed no past, only the present, and words fell from her lips without conscious thought. ‘Please …’
She looked stricken as the realization of what she said sank in, and she lifted her hands in a defensive gesture as he dispensed with them and drew her close.
His skin was warm against her cheek, and she felt a hand cradle her head as the other slid low over the back of her waist.
It felt good … he felt good, and she breathed in the scent of him, the faint traces of soap, cologne and the muskiness of man.
His hand brushed a path over her spine, rested briefly at her nape, then slid slowly down in a slow soothing pattern that did much to settle her ragged breathing.
She didn’t want to move, and she instinctively lifted her arms to link her hands together at the back of his neck.
He grazed his lips over her cheek, nuzzled her ear, then eased his mouth down to savour the curve at the base of her neck … and sensed the breath hitch in her throat.
A hand shifted to her waist and gently slipped beneath the sleep top to skim the warm skin as he traced a path to her breast, cupped it, then brushed the tender peak until it swelled to his touch.
With care, he deepened the kiss, tasting, exploring the inner texture, the sensitive tissues as he encouraged her response. Her body jerked as he took her lower lip into his mouth and bit down gently, and she moved restlessly in his arms, seeking more, wanting so much more.
With care he eased the cotton top high, and when she didn’t resist he removed it completely.
‘Beautiful,’ Loukas said gently as he shaped each
