he discovered a moment later when their gazes connected and his pulse flew into overdrive. He found her every bit as attractive as he had twelve years before. His spirits took a swift and surprisingly strong upswing—only to nose-dive a moment later. Just because he felt the old chemistry didn’t mean she did. And even if she did, he doubted that she’d want to renew their friendship, let alone anything more. Why should she, after what he’d done to her twelve years ago? Yet, he couldn’t quite stifle the hope that suddenly surged through him.
Maggie moved toward him then, and he stood as she joined him, noting the slight flush on her cheeks. One more thing that hadn’t changed, he tallied with pleasure. She still blushed. It was a quality he’d always found endearing.
“I wasn’t sure you’d come back out,” he confessed quietly.
She served the juice and muffins, avoiding his gaze. “Why wouldn’t I?”
There was a moment of silence before he responded. “I wouldn’t have blamed you if you hadn’t,” he told her, instead of replying to the question.
She risked a glance at him then, praying that her fragile composure would hold. “That was a long time ago, Jake.” Much to her surprise—and relief—her voice was steady, and she congratulated herself for sounding so calm and controlled when her insides were churning.
Jake eyed her speculatively, debating whether to pursue the subject “Maybe so,” he responded carefully. “But some things are hard to forget.”
A shadow crossed her eyes, come and gone so quickly he almost missed it. Anyone else would have. But once he had been keenly attuned to the nuances of her emotions. Apparently he still was. No matter what she said next, he knew that the hurt was still there, possibly buried so deeply in her heart even she didn’t realize it still existed. But it clearly did, and his gut twisted painfully as he came face-to-face with the lingering effects of his actions twelve years before.
Instead of responding directly to his comment, she shrugged, and when she spoke, her tone was straightforward. “Life goes on, though. We all learn to cope.”
He wanted to ask if life had been good to her, if she’d found the happiness she deserved, if she’d had much trouble raising the twins…if her heart belonged to another man. She wore no ring. He’d noticed that right away. But you didn’t ask someone personal questions after twelve years. Not when you’d long ago forfeited the right. He had to settle for a less probing query. “So you’ve managed all right, then, Maggie?”
Maggie looked into his eyes—warm and compelling and intense—and remembered with a bittersweet pang how easily she used to get lost in his dark gaze. How, with a simple look, he could make her heart soar. His eyes were still expressive, still powerful, she realized. But she wasn’t susceptible to their magnetism anymore, she told herself resolutely. A lot of things had changed. She’d changed. And this man, once the center of her world, was really nothing more than a stranger to her now.
She tucked the tray under her arm and forced herself to smile. “Well, as you can see, I have a business. The girls are well. We’ve done fine. I hope your career has been as satisfying as mine.”
“The navy has given me a good life,” he acknowledged. “I have no regrets about that choice, anyway.”
But he had regrets about other choices? Better not to ask, though, she decided quickly.
“Well, I have things to attend to, Jake,” she said brightly. “I hope your stay with us has been pleasant—”
The words died in her throat as he reached out and touched her arm.
“I know this situation is somewhat…awkward…but I can’t help thinking our paths crossed again for some reason.” He paused, searching for a convincing way to phrase his request. Finally he drew a deep breath, his eyes reflecting the intensity of his feelings. “I don’t want to walk away without at least talking to you,” he told her honestly, his gaze steady and direct. “Will you give me half an hour or so? For old times’ sake, if nothing else?”
Maggie tried to ignore the entreaty in his eyes as she considered his request. But it was hard to think rationally when the warmth of his hand was seeping through the sleeve of her blouse. She really didn’t want to talk to him. What good would it possibly accomplish after all these years? It seemed far…safer…to leave the past where it belonged—in the past.
But she had to admit that, like him, she was thrown by the odd coincidence that had brought them together. A coincidence so odd that it seemed somehow more than coincidence. She recalled how she’d prayed for just such a “coincidence” more often than she cared to admit in the early years, when she was struggling to earn a living and cope with the challenges of single parenthood. There were so many times when a simple touch, a warm, caring hand holding hers, would have lightened her burden immeasurably. But the Lord hadn’t answered those prayers. Not in the way she’d hoped for, at least. Instead, He had helped her find hidden reserves of strength, spirit and determination that had seen her through the rough times. In the end, she’d made it on her own, and in so doing, discovered that she was a capable and competent woman who didn’t need to rely on a man to survive. The experience had bolstered her self-esteem, and she had learned to make choices and plans decisively and with confidence.
So why had the Lord sent Jake now, long after she’d stopped asking? Why disrupt her world now, when she had not only resigned herself to a solitary life, but made her peace with it? Maggie didn’t have a clue. But there must be a reason for this unexpected meeting, and maybe she should at least try to find out what it was.
“Please, Maggie,” Jake persisted. “It would mean a lot to me.”
She drew a deep breath and nodded. “All right, Jake. The girls can finish up the breakfast.”
His answering smile was warm and grateful—and relieved. “Thank you.” He glanced at his watch. “I need to make a quick call. Then we can talk.”
“There’s a phone in the drawing room. Next to the fireplace.”
He nodded. “I’ll be right back.”
Maggie watched him leave, then sank down into the closest chair. Her seat afforded her a discreet view of the drawing room. He was turned slightly away from her as he used the phone, and she took advantage of the opportunity to observe him.
He’s changed, she noted thoughtfully. He’d filled out, the lanky frame she remembered maturing into a trim, well-toned body. The style of his dark brown hair was familiar, though shorter than it used to be. And a faint brush of silver at both temples gave him a distinguished air. The few lines on his face, which hadn’t been there when they parted, spoke more of character than of age. Maggie had to admit that he was even more handsome now than he had been twelve years before.
But there was something else different about him, something beyond the physical that she couldn’t quite put her finger on, she realized with a frown. He radiated a quiet confidence, a decisiveness, a sense of determination and purpose. It was reflected in his body language, in the very way he moved, she thought, as he hung up the phone and made a few quick notes on the pad beside it. The Jake she had known was eager, restless and searching. This Jake was polished, self-assured and at peace with his place in the world.
And yet…there was a certain indefinable sadness in his eyes, a world-weariness, that tugged at her heart It was almost as if he’d searched the world for something but had come up empty, and ultimately had resigned himself to that fact.
