lips tightened. “Sit down, Margaret,” she commanded in a firm voice. “There are some things we need to talk about—woman to woman. Some things you should have been told long ago.”
Even through her outrage and distress, Maggie heard the serious note underlying her mother’s voice. Her irritation fled. “What sort of things?” she asked, her voice wary…almost fearful.
“Things about me and your father and a baby I had before you and Ronald came along…”
Perhaps thirty minutes had passed since Howard’s talk with his wife. He stood staring out of the waiting room window at the light-flooded parking lot, wondering how things were going with Eva and Maggie, and whether Eva’s confession and story of regained faith would make any difference to how Maggie dealt with her situation.
He drew a deep breath. Even if it made no difference in Maggie’s feelings, he supposed she should be told the truth. She had a right to know what her parents were like in their youth. She should know that he had loved Eva for as long as he could remember.
And, he conceded, it might help ease some of the concerns about her own marriage to know that her parents hadn’t always seen eye to eye…that the young aspiring actress he’d married hadn’t always been the perfect preacher’s wife, and that their vastly different upbringings and ways of approaching life had caused some problems during their life together. Problems they’d overcome with love and God’s help.
Howard sighed. He knew he was fooling himself. There was no doubt the stories could help Maggie. His real concern was how breaking a forty-three-year-old silence would affect his wife.
Bowing his head, Howard prayed that Eva’s decision was the right one, that she would find the right words to tell Maggie the truth. That Maggie would forgive.
God answers prayers in three ways, Howard. Yes, no and wait a while.
Howard recalled his father’s words from his childhood. He realized all too well that people often questioned God’s wisdom and sometimes turned their backs on him when the answer to their prayers was a “no” and they so desperately wanted it to be “yes.”
Maggie had a right to know the truth so that she could see that God was in control, and that sometimes unanswered prayers were a blessing in disguise.
April 1951
Dallas was way too big, Howard Blake thought as he surveyed the bustling traffic and the towering buildings whose windows flung the day’s last rays of sunshine into his eyes. As the old adage went, it was a nice place to visit, but he wouldn’t want to live there. A three-day national church convention was plenty long enough for a country boy like him.
Howard had graduated from Baylor at midterm, just in time to step into his retiring father’s shoes as minister of the church in Crystal Creek. It was a position he’d always aspired to, even though it had necessitated his leaving home for four years. Growing up in the small Hill Country town, he had been predisposed to attend Baylor, located in Waco, instead of a smaller college in the large city of Dallas. Howard could contend with the larger university better than he could handle the chaos of big-city life.
Still, when he was urged by his new congregation to attend the convention, there had been no way he could decline without making waves. Following in his father’s footsteps was no easy task, and Howard was well aware that while he was still in the “honeymoon” period with church members, both he and his actions were under constant scrutiny.
Just twenty-two himself, he knew the younger folk liked him. High school and college students could identify with him better than with his father, whom they considered ancient at sixty-three. The younger Blake represented exciting new ideas, a fresh approach, a more modem outlook—within the confines of church doctrine, of course.
The elderly members weren’t so sure. They liked the old, familiar ways and had grown accustomed to the tenor and content of Thaddeus Blake’s sermons. There was also a small contingent who looked down on Howard because he hadn’t joined up to fight in Korea, even though, as an only son—an only child—he’d been deferred from active duty.
The over-forty members regarded Howard warily, as if they expected him to suddenly denounce all they considered holy and run off with the church secretary…and the weekly contribution. After almost four months, Howard still felt as if he were living under some gigantic microscope, his every move monitored and judged by some unseen jury…which was why he’d smiled and assured the deacons that he’d be thrilled to attend the convention in Dallas.
He supposed the endeavor had been a success, but being cooped up for three days and contributing even a small part to the decision making that would shape his life and that of others was serious business. Howard was past ready for some quiet time…and a nice Texas-size steak in a good restaurant.
He planned to follow his meal with an early night and be ready to head back to the Hill Country at daybreak…unless he decided to look up Evalyn Carmichael, who was back in Texas—more specifically, Dallas—after spending the past two years in Hollywood, where she’d sought a career as an actress.
Though he was unaware of it, the thought of Eva made Howard’s heart beat a little faster. He told himself that looking her up while he was in town would be a good deed. He could check and see how she was doing and give her parents a firsthand report when he got back home. As the minister of her former congregation, he could consider the visit his Christian duty.
He sighed. It seemed he’d loved Eva Carmichael most of his life…at the very least since the day he’d looked up into the choir loft and seen her standing there in her pristine white robe, singing her heart out. She’d looked like an angel…her roundish face aglow, her eyes alight with pure pleasure while the Sunday morning sun filtered through the stained-glass window and shot fiery sparks off her auburn hair.
With his heart fluttering in his chest like a caged bird, Howard was sure he’d never seen anything or anyone so beautiful. He’d lost his heart to her that day, and unbeknownst to her, she’d had it ever since. He’d been twelve; Eva only ten.
Not surprisingly, Eva had grown into the most gorgeous creature Howard had ever seen, with masses of naturally wavy auburn hair and a face and figure that caused no little stir in the small town. He heard whispers—even from girls her age, who said she dressed like a floozy with her tight skirts and sweaters and her fullblown, movie-star makeup.
Even Howard’s mother had shaken her head in dismay. She knew that Eva, an aspiring actress, was in love with Hollywood and that she was just looking for glamour, but feared the young woman’s tendency to go to extremes would cause her heartbreak someday.
Howard, who fell more and more in love with Eva every day, had listened with half an ear. Her glamorous persona represented a world that was as far removed from his day-to-day existence as Mars, and even though he carried the torch for her all through high school, he knew she was as out of his reach as that faraway planet.
She never once looked his way during that time—not that he really expected her to. He’d been a tall, skinny “square” back then—complete with a fairly serious case of acne and horn—rimmed glasses. It was no wonder Eva had overlooked him in favor of Nate Purdy, who was not only her own age but tall and good-looking, with
