know you can. But you shouldn’t have to. Especially not in this situation, Holly.” His hand slid over the table to cover hers. “I know this has to be rough. How rough I can’t even imagine as a single guy with no one depending on me. Now Cook County has added to your burden by messing up Rico’s custody arrangements. At least let me try to make that up to you.”
Holly drew her hand out from under his. It felt too good to have that human contact, and she surely couldn’t get used to it. “There’s no way you can make up to me what Cook County did to mess up my life. But I know you’re not going away for a while, so I might as well get used to you.” She’d try to get used to him, anyway. It would be difficult to do without depending on him, but Holly knew that she couldn’t depend on anybody anymore. The past eighteen months had certainly taught her that. “What do I owe you for breakfast?”
He waved away her concern before she could reach for her purse. “Nothing. I spent less altogether than I would have for one coffee and a scone in Chicago.”
“Well, don’t make a habit of providing the groceries around here.”
“Only as long as I’m eating part of them. Will we have time for a supermarket run once you drop these guys off at school? I only got one cup of coffee for each of us, and I can guarantee that I’ll be looking for more before we go in to The Bistro later.”
Holly felt tired already. Having Alex around was certainly going to complicate her life. Maybe if she didn’t argue with him, and showed him enough of what her normal life was like, he’d lose interest quickly. “Sure. Now, why don’t you go break up the water fight that I know is going on in the bathroom so that we can get those guys to school on time and relatively dry?”
It surprised her to see that he seemed to relish the prospect. “Will do. They need any help with getting dressed or anything while I’m in there?”
Holly tried not to smirk. “Try asking them that and see the answer you get.” The ruckus that would follow that kind of question would be worth the price of admission. Maybe having Alex around wouldn’t last long after all. Surely a day or two of this would have him hightailing it back to Chicago.
He rose, grinning. “I don’t think so. You look like that would be too easy. And I have to remember they’re independent guys even if they aren’t very tall. Even at five, I don’t remember wanting help with much of anything. I’ll settle for breaking up the water fight. And once we get them dropped off, you and I are going to have a long conversation on personal safety.”
He was going to be a hard one to shake, Holly thought as he retreated to the hall bathroom. Something about watching him from a rear view made her worry about more than just getting rid of him. Seeing him in jeans early in the morning, Holly could tell that having Alex around was going to be more threatening to her personal safety than worrying about Rico out there someplace in the shadows.
Chapter Four
Grocery shopping with Alex was a nerve-racking experience for Holly. She was sure she would rather have been pushing the cart through the aisles with both boys along, and that was her least favorite way to shop. But Alex was much more adamant about putting into the cart large numbers of things she couldn’t afford and didn’t usually get. And unlike her boys, a pointed look in his direction did not make him put things back on the shelves.
In fact, no amount of arguing made him stick to her list or her budget. “You’re not doing me any favors in the long run,” she told him when he put the third expensive package of meat into the cart. “Once you’re gone in a few days the boys will only wonder why I’m not getting all this again.”
“Then they’ll be happy to have good old Uncle Alex stick around a while, won’t they?”
It was all Holly could do not to roll her eyes. “That’s what they’ll see when they look at you, isn’t it? An uncle to spoil them and let them do things that I wouldn’t on a bet. Of course they’ll be happy to keep you around.”
“Hey, I’d think you’d be just as happy. You get a little help, and Cook County pays both at the same time. If I were in your shoes it wouldn’t bother me to have them pay for a whole lot.”
Holly didn’t know how to answer that one. She’d tried hard not to blame the police force for Kevin’s death. It had been a struggle not to blame his job, or God, or even fate or whatever for what had happened. None of those alternatives seemed like the Christian way to deal with what had happened. But if she were honest with herself, the kind of feelings Alex was describing welled up in her more often than she’d like to admit. How did he do that? She didn’t remember inviting Alex Wilkins into her personal world of thoughts and feelings, yet he managed to get there often enough to make her quite uncomfortable.
She hoped her discomfort didn’t show. Holly wasn’t ready to share her deepest feelings with this man yet. “Well, be glad you’re not in my shoes. Because it’s not a very nice place to be right now.” Even that amount of honesty surprised her. She was used to keeping her problems to herself. What was it about squabbling over expensive cookies in the grocery store with this man that brought out so many mixed feelings?
“Gee, do I sense a little hostility here?” Alex stepped back from the cart. “If so, hooray. You need to vent some of that once in a while, Holly.”
She pushed the half-loaded basket past him, narrowly missing his toes. He was a cool customer; he didn’t even flinch when the cart rolled by that close. “Since when have you added psychologist to your other degrees, Wilkins? It doesn’t become you.”
“Not really psychology, just common sense. There’s still plenty of that taught in the academy and at law school. Maybe even we don’t apply it as often as we should.”
“How’s that?” He sounded genuinely concerned, and Holly wanted to know what he meant.
“I’ve been telling the brass for years that we don’t give enough support to victims and their families. Which is why I probably got this assignment,” he finished with a rueful grin. “Maybe they figure if I see what that kind of support actually entails I won’t be so quick to volunteer it.”
“Suits me. Then maybe I can get back to life as I know it.” Holly pushed the cart past another aisle, anxious to get out of the store without too much more goody-buying from Alex.
He wasn’t about to let her get away easily. Alex walked in front and put both hands on the end of the cart, blocking her way. “Yeah, well, don’t be so quick to go back to life as you know it. You weren’t doing that great a job, Holly.”
His gaze on her made a shiver run up her spine. She couldn’t ignore the serious tone of what he said or the implications of the words, either. “What—what do you mean by that?” she stammered.
“I may have only been here a day or so, but I’ve looked around. In a perfectly normal situation you’d be doing an okay job. But this isn’t a perfectly normal situation. And from what I’ve seen, you’re stressed and short on patience and money. Raising kids alone can’t be fun or easy.”
“No, but it’s reality, so you might as well let me get back to it.” Holly felt like folding her arms and pouting. Of course, neither action would make Alex take her any more seriously.
“Sorry, I can’t do that. I think I’ve made it perfectly clear that I’m not leaving for a while. I want to make sure you’re plenty safe first. You and the boys.”
