And was she truly dismayed?
She glanced about the stone chamber, which had almost become her own. She never slept in the chamber with Mary and the boys. She was becoming accustomed to sharing Alasdair’s room.
“Juliana? Have you seen Roger?” Mary asked worriedly from the doorway.
“I thought all the boys were downstairs.”
Mary shook her head, one hand on her now swollen belly. “He has vanished.”
Juliana hurried to her. “He hasn’t disappeared, I assure you of that.”
“No.” Mary plucked her sleeve. “He has begun to ask me where William is. He has started to complain that he wants his father—and he wants to go home.”
Juliana was surprised. Roger, although the eldest, was far quieter and more steadfast than his mischievous brother, Donald. He was so clearly the thoughtful brother—which would serve him well when, one day, he became lord of Castle Bain. “Roger has been complaining?”
Mary nodded. “Just this morning I tried to tell him that we will go home soon, but he refused to listen—he ran out of the chamber. Now, I cannot find him.”
Juliana was mildly alarmed. “I will find him, Mary. Just rest. He cannot have gone far.” She left her sister and hurried downstairs. It took a half an hour for her to realize that if Roger was within the castle, he was deliberately hiding from them. No one had seen him since they had all broken the fast that morning.
Juliana was alarmed, but she had no intention of worrying her sister. Having taken up a warmer mantle, she was about to go outside to look for him when Alasdair came striding inside.
He was disheveled from the wind, his long hair tangled about his shoulders, the bright blue feather more visible than ever, patches of mud on his boots, the skirts of his leine, and even his bare thighs. He grinned at her. “We will have venison tonight.”
She smiled back. Her heart turned over as it always did when she first saw him, after not seeing him for a few hours. Perhaps it was time to admit that she had truly become fond of him. “Then everyone will be pleased. Alasdair—have you seen Roger?”
“Isn’t he with the other children?”
“I have just searched the entire castle—if he is here, he is hiding. But perhaps he is outside.”
He was bewildered. “Why would he hide?”
“He has started to behave oddly, with distress—he has been asking to go home to his father.”
An odd look that she could not decipher crossed his face. “I’ll help ye look fer him.”
They went outside into the bailey, Alasdair telling her to search the area by the front gates. As they headed off in opposite directions, Juliana became dismayed when she saw the front gates were open. But even a small boy would be remarked if he walked out of Dunyveg—surely.
Another hour passed, in which Juliana became extremely alarmed. No one had seen Roger, and she had searched every nook and cranny of the bailey. She asked a passing lad if he knew where Alasdair was, and she was told he was in the stables.
Trying to reassure herself, Juliana hurried across the bailey and into the stone stables. It was dark within, smelling pleasantly of hay and horses. As she entered, a dog ran up to her, its tail wagging, and several mares nickered.
Alasdair stepped out of the shadows and placed a finger upon his lips, then nodded to his right.
Juliana rushed forward. Alasdair took her arm and guided her to where an old mare was stalled, a young foal suckling at her side. Roger was curled up in the chips and hay, in a far corner of the stall, asleep.
She inhaled in relief. Alasdair put his arm around her and pulled her close. She looked up at him, feeling a rush of gratitude. “We have to wake him. I’m surprised that mare allowed him inside with her colt.”
“Let me do it,” he said.
Juliana assumed that he did not want her to go within, in case the mare decided to behave protectively towards her foal. She watched him step inside, pat the mare, then carefully sidestep her and kneel by Roger. He lifted him into his arms and carried him outside.
As he did, Roger awoke.
Alasdair smiled at him. “Did ye come to see the newborn colt?”
Roger became widely awake. His eyes huge, he shook his head.
Alasdair stepped outside the stall, closed it, and set Roger down. “Did ye think to find a horse, then, and ride away?”
Juliana started. Why would he ask such a question!
Roger was tearful and belligerent. “I don’t like being a hostage.”
“I ken.” He stroked his hair. “No one likes being held hostage, but it’s the way of men.”
Roger shook his head fiercely. “I hate it here!”
Alasdair knelt. “I ken. But ye have a duty to yer mother. Ye frightened her, Roger, hiding as ye did, and thinking to run away. Ye frightened yer aunt. Yer duty is to be strong and brave like yer father. Do ye not wish to be like William?”
“Yes,” he finally said, his gaze riveted upon Alasdair. “Will I ever go home?”
“Of course ye’ll go home. But until ye do, ye must take care of yer mother. Ye canna worry or frighten her again. I ken, ’tis hard being brave. Even when yer grown like I am. But a man dinna have a choice, Roger. Every man has a duty to his kin to be strong and brave.”
Juliana was moved. She had not known Alasdair could be so gentle and kind with children.
Roger continued to gaze keenly at him. “But you’ve never been afraid. You’re Alasdair Og!”
“Sit with me.” Alasdair sat down on a bale of hay, and Roger sat down beside him, enraptured. “A long time ago, when I was much younger than ye, I was sent away from my mother and my father. I was a hostage too.”
Juliana started. She had never heard a word of this before!
Roger’s eyes popped. “You were a hostage?”
“Aye, the King of Scotland held me hostage, for he was very angry with my father. I was sent to him with only a maid.”
Roger bit his lip. “You did not have your mother?”
Alasdair laid his hand on his shoulder. “No. But ye have yer mother, yer aunt, and yer brothers with ye. Ye must remember that.”
Roger nodded. “Were you scared?”
“Yes. It was very hard being strong and brave.” His regard serious, he added, “I dinna ken I would ever go home, but I did. And as soon as yer ransom is paid, ye will go home, but ye must vow ye’ll not run away again.”
“I promise.”
“Good.”
