nights for fear she would go over the rail with an empty cask and try to make it back.”
“A fool’s errand that would have left her dead.”
“She wanted to attend that surgical school so badly.”
“Another fool’s errand. Did you learn what made her so desperate to join you at the first?”
Katherine made a noise. “The father of the children she’d been hired to care for. Apparently he didn’t believe her duties should end once the children went to bed. I still don’t know if she was running from a threat or a fait accompli.”
“Christ.” James rubbed his forehead.
“I shall take her to Dunscore with me.” She prayed it would be soon, and not just for Millie’s sake. “I cannot turn her into an acceptable candidate for a school of medicine, but at least there she’ll be safe.”
His gaze shot to her. “Nothing about your plan has changed, then.” After what happened in the carriage, hung in the air.
“I intend to do what I must.”
Marry me, Katherine. The choice she’d rejected taunted her. He did not repeat it.
“You said nothing about your captivity at the hearing. It might have made a difference. It still could. I shall speak with Winston and ask him to reconvene the committee.”
“Good God.” She almost laughed. “Those men cared about nothing more than preventing my return to sea and putting me under the control of a man’s hand. I could have set forth every detail and the result would have been the same.” James stood in front of her now. Secret places she’d hardly been aware of before grew warm and moist beneath his gaze.
He was remembering, too. It was there in his eyes, along with the torment of his wild imaginings about her life with Mejdan al-Zayar.
“It might have elicited sympathy,” he said.
“Nothing could have done that after Lord Edrington’s revelation,” she said mirthlessly. “In the face of which you defended me.” Which only proved the depth of his guilt. It all seemed so ridiculous now. Nothing in the past could be changed.
“Yes.”
“Because of the debt.”
“Because I should have perished with the Henry’s Cross, and because everything I told the committee was true. Anyhow, I’m alive because you did not leave me to die.”
“I gave the order to do it.”
“You are an experienced sea captain, Katherine. Unlike the committee, you don’t need me to explain what that entails.” His tone was dark. Rough. “The kinds of decisions one has to make.”
She could see what he was thinking as clearly as if he’d told her. “Such as whether to engage the corsairs over the fate of a small merchant ship,” she said. The two decisions—his and hers—should have made them even, except that she had changed her mind about hers, and nothing he could have done differently would have changed the outcome of his. “Your regret is wasted on that. My experience would have been the same had you never happened upon us.”
A muscle worked in his jaw. It was a perfect time to tell him the truth about life with Mejdan al-Zayar—about crowded market vendors hawking bright scarves and sparkling bangles, about screaming with laughter as the dogs snatched Tamilla’s new silk slippers from the harem and left the slobbery pieces beneath the tangerine tree in the courtyard, about Mejdan’s daughter Kisa and her telescope. His torment would be better directed toward any number of English girls married off to men of their fathers’ choosing, who ended up slaves to a marriage bed that brought only pain and disgust.
“I am sorry I gave that order,” she said instead.
“You shouldn’t be,” he whispered harshly. “I am not sorry I gave mine. Only that I failed to execute it properly.”
“You nearly killed me, and I you. The score is even, Captain—” his eyes blazed at that “—and now that there is a solution, we may finally be free of each other.”
“YOU’RE GOING TO marry her?” Nick’s outrage exploded into James’s library at half past nine the next morning.
James didn’t bother to look up from the desk. He’d returned from Katherine’s at four, and a few hours’ restless sleep left him in no condition to deal with an outburst. “Marry whom?”
“Katherine Kinloch.” Nick walked right up to the desk and braced his hands on the surface. “You could at least have told me before you let it fly all over London.”
“I assure you, I have no plans to marry Lady Dunscore.” He kept his voice cool, but a hot sensation snaked down to his loins.
“No? Everyone at Lady Effy’s was agog with the news—and the fact that neither you nor Lady Dunscore were present. I don’t suppose that was a coincidence.”
An excuse not to be at Lady Effy’s last night was possibly the one good thing to come of all this. “No, it wasn’t. We were both needed in aid of a mutual friend.”
Nick glanced at James’s crotch and snorted. “Mutual friend.”
Quick as that James reached across the desk and grabbed Nick by the lapels. “Do not insinuate where you are not informed,” he bit out.
“Damn you,” Nick shot back without flinching, and shoved James away. “I need some kind of leverage. If you marry her, I’ll have none.” Nick glared at him. “I’ve tried every bloody thing I can think of. I’m running out of options. She won’t go to Scotland.”
“Scotland. And you fear my marriage to Lady Dunscore? For God’s sake, do let’s get Honoria involved in some bloody scandal and drag the whole family into the mud.”
“You have no idea what this means.”
“Are you in love with her?”
“Of course I’m in love with her. What man wouldn’t be? She’s a goddamned angel. Every time I so much as think about her with Adkins or Oakley or Stalworth— It simply can’t happen.”
James watched his brother wrestle with the fact that there could be no way to protect Miss Holliswell from her father’s aspirations. “My previous offer still stands,” he said. Forty thousand to resolve this—it would be worth the price.
“Bloody lot of good it would do me, even if I could accept it, which you already know I can’t. He’d never consent.” Nick paced the length of the room and turned back. “Why in God’s name won’t she go to Scotland?” He exhaled, pinching the bridge of his nose. “All right. If the rumors are false and you’re not planning to marry Katherine Kinloch, then there’s still a possibility of my securing a second hearing. Or—God help me—putting a new bill on the table.”
“For Christ’s sake, Nick, I can’t let you do that.”
“Do
