just as efficiently as any divorce diet, weeping into her pillow at night.
It was a long forty minutes before Simone opened the door to the reception room and Gina shot to her feet, betraying her anxiety.
“Will you join us for a few minutes, Ms. James?”
“Gina,” she said. “Please, just call me Gina.” And then she followed the older woman into the office.
Ashley held a wadded-up tissue in her grip and it was obvious—she’d done a little crying for the counselor. This suggested she had shared her personal business. Gina tried not to smile. The counselor indicated a chair and Gina took it expectantly.
“Ashley and I have talked about things and I’ve asked her to come back in two weeks for another talk. But in the meantime I’d like her to try a teen group that meets here, in this office. Their issues run the gamut—a little of everything—but they seem to be very helpful to each other. That group meets Tuesdays and Thursdays here—my associate moderates the group and he’s terrific. Ashley is willing to give that a try.”
“Okay,” Gina said. Why did she think this one counseling session would provide a cure? She knew better. And why did she fear group therapy? Ashley had a broken heart—almost a rite of passage. She feared hooking her up with a bunch of troubled teens, some possibly there by court order. “You’re good with that idea, Ash?” she asked.
“My first choice is to go home and just sit in the closet for a year,” Ashley said.
“Thus the counseling, group and individual,” Simone said. “The closet is not a good idea. Not designed for recovery. You move at your own speed in group,” she went on. “They’re not going to hold you down and make you talk—that’s entirely up to you. And if it’s not right for you, well, we’ll just try something else. In the meantime, please call me if you’re having a hard time.” She looked at Gina. “Ashley has my cell number and I’ll take her call if I’m not in session. If I’m in session, I’ll return the call as soon as I can.”
Four
Cooper had driven to North Bend a few times to meet Sarah, twice for lunch and twice for dinner when she was sitting alert and stuck at the air station. But she’d never invited him inside to pet the helicopters or meet her colleagues or crews. When she invited him to join her at the end of inspection blowout at a local pub, his face lit up like a beacon. They were even arriving and leaving together.
As they were driving from Thunder Point to North Bend he said, “You’re bringing me out of the closet,” he teased, obviously incredibly pleased.
“I try to keep my professional life and my personal life separate,” she said.
“You’re letting the guys know you have a boyfriend,” he said, laughter in his voice.
“How do you know I don’t just need a designated driver?”
“It wouldn’t surprise me at all if you planned to get wasted,” he said. “You’ve been really stressed out over this inspection. Maybe now you can relax a little bit.”
But it was not the inspection, Sarah thought. The inspection was a lot of work, but her team was outstanding and she never worried for a second—she knew they’d come out smelling like roses. It was that other matter—facing a potential reassignment in the near future and having no idea which way to turn.
Note to self, she thought, I need a better cover! I can’t let it show! Not until I’m ready to talk about it and I can’t talk about it until I know what the hell to do!
When she told Buzz she was bringing a date, she emphasized, “No one knows about your little HR bombshell so don’t breathe a word at the party.”
“Since I swore you to secrecy, no one better know,” he said.
“I mean, not even Cooper. Especially not Cooper. So don’t take him out by the keg for a private little chat.”
And then Buzz had lifted his blond eyebrows and said, “You know, when stuff like this came up, even if it’s secret stuff, if it affects the family, I would always talk to my wife,” he said.
And she said, “And now? Twice divorced? Who do you talk to now?”
“Okay,” he said. “Got me there. I wouldn’t talk to a girlfriend. If I had one.”
“Exactly,” she had said.
And to Cooper she said, “Listen, do me a favor. Don’t mention to anyone at this party that I’ve been stressed out. I wouldn’t want them to think I’m anything but cool and calm. When women get command positions and act like nervous girls, it really plays hell on the leadership role. Got that?”
He just grinned at her.
“I’m not going to get wasted and you better not, either.”
He grinned bigger.
“If they start to get a little nuts or start doing shots, walk away,” she ordered.
“And if I don’t?” he teased.
She reached across the cab of his truck and squeezed his thigh. “If you ever want to have sex again, you’ll behave.”
He laughed and said, “Now you’re speaking my language. And boy, am I glad you’ve got this inspection behind you!”
I need another kind of inspection, she thought. Something to keep his mind off my mood.
Most things about the party were entirely predictable—like the fact that everyone was loose and happy and got the biggest kick out of Sarah bringing a man, as if she were a nun or the resident lesbian. The fact that he was a helicopter pilot really charged them up and there were lots of questions about his civilian jobs. Cooper had worked for private contractors who provided the military with services from flying Blackhawks in foreign countries, to years working for oil companies in the Gulf of Mexico. There were many toasts to the XO and CO for the winning performance in the inspection and before long there were toasts for just about anything—for taking a breath, for standing after a couple of hours of steady drinking. And when the captain and XO left the party, they got louder and started doing shots.
Cooper was having a good time and, as ordered, did not do shots. But Sarah got pulled into the fray and threw back at least a couple, and she didn’t miss the twinkle in Cooper’s highly entertained eyes. She received many slaps on the back, many high fives, and it was confirmed that she was a lot more fun when she had a boyfriend. But when her face became flushed, Cooper said, “Okay, missy, that should do it for you. Let’s take off.”
“Please,” she said. “Oh, please...”
“I don’t need a bucket for the truck, do I?”
“Don’t be silly,” she said, eyes at half mast. “I can hold my liquor!”
“Oh, you’re doing great,” Cooper said. “It’s ten o’clock.” Sarah wasn’t sure they had cleared the parking lot before she was asleep. She had vague memories of being half carried, half dragged into the house.
In what seemed like three seconds later she groaned and muttered,
