until none of the women looked upon him with desire. Due to his rank, he could have had any of them, but he didn’t want a woman who considered him an object of scorn. He had no idea what Katherine thought of him. But at this moment, his senses were captivated by her.
She stood before the fire. Her silhouette was visible under the wet gown, and her rosy nipples were hard nubs beneath the fabric. The undeniable instinct to touch her was starting to wear down his honor.
Ademar turned his back, trying to hide his physical reaction to her. God above, he needed to stand outside in the rain for another hour, just to quell the unbidden response.
Her hand moved to his tunic, which clung to his torso like a wet skin. “You should take this off.” Her tone was matter-of-fact, as though it meant nothing for him to bare his chest before her. But he hardly knew what he was doing here, much less what she wanted from him.
He knew exactly what he wanted from her. And nothing about it was honorable.
Right now, he wanted to peel away her wet clothing, to taste her cool flesh, kissing a path down to her breasts. His body ached to touch hers, to join with her in the most intimate of ways. Although he might not have experienced the warmth of a woman’s body, he’d heard stories from his brothers, and he’d kept the information, knowing that one day he would put it to use.
Damn it all, he wanted to lie with her, to possess her as only a husband should. And knowing that she would never choose a man like him, made it all the more difficult to keep his hands to himself.
“I shouldn’t be here with you,” Katherine said. “My father would have me beaten if he knew.”
And Nicholas of Ardennes would have the flesh flayed from Ademar’s own skin. It was worth it, he decided. Even though he’d have to let her go, he would always remember her kiss.
“I’ll leave,” he offered. “Or I can send a maid to you.”
Though he had moved toward the door, Katherine stepped in front of him, hindering his path. Her dark blue eyes studied him, as though she couldn’t quite make a decision. Her hands clasped, then unclasped before her fingers touched her lips. “I’ve never…done something like that before. Kissed a man for no reason.”
She rubbed her shoulders as if trying to ward off a chill. “I wanted you to know it. I was angry at my sister and Ewan, and I just…” Her explanation faded away.
Just what? he wanted to ask. A thousand questions rose up, but he couldn’t speak a single word without feeling like a fool. Instead, he stood before her, the unbearable silence rising up like a shield.
She flushed. “I’m sorry I behaved so badly. I shouldn’t have kissed you.” Moving aside, Katherine gave him an open walkway to the door. She stared at the floor, as though she’d humiliated herself with the admission.
She was hurting right now. He could see it in her eyes, in the way she held herself. He wanted to tell her that the kiss she’d bestowed had been an unexpected gift. That she was a woman worthy of being loved, even if he could never be the man she wanted.
Words. He needed words right now. But he was trapped in a maelstrom of tangled thoughts and useless phrases. If he opened his mouth, nothing would make sense.
She was leaning against the wall, gripping her arms as though despair had settled over her, and he spied a tear slipping from beneath her lashes.
Had he made her cry? Or was she dreaming of Ewan MacEgan, grieving for her loss?
Ademar moved in front of her, tilting her chin up to look at him. He slid his fingers into her hair, tossing aside the wet veil, and framing her face with his clumsy hands.
He kissed her. With his mouth, he tried to tell her that she was beautiful. He savored the taste of her lips, like sweet grapes.
She lifted her arms around him once more, and he opened his mouth, dipping his tongue into her depths the way he wanted to enter her body. She was trembling now, her skin prickling with goose flesh.
Without asking permission, he pulled her into his arms and brought her near the hearth. Turning her to face the flames, he lifted the wet gown away from her skin, trying to warm it. And her.
Katherine didn’t speak, but peeled away the wet bliaud and underdress. The layers fell away until she stood in her linen shift, barefoot. He couldn’t stop himself from tracing the outline of her neck, down her slender shoulders, to rest upon her waist. Her bottom rested against his hard length, and she deliberately pressed against him.
“This is sinful,” she whispered, holding his hands in hers. “But I don’t care. I want to be wicked right now.”
She drew his arms to cross over her breasts. He could feel the plump curves of them, and he tried to distract himself with kissing her nape.
Then she moved his palms to her nipples, and he grew even harder. He could barely breathe, he knew not what she was doing. He spread out his fingers, letting them splay over the large handful. Then he gently squeezed the flesh, and she gasped.
Suddenly, it didn’t matter that he didn’t know what to do. This was about her, about making her understand how much he cared. He experimented with his touch, gently caressing her as though she were made of silk. He learned the amount of pressure she liked, and when she leaned in, he rubbed his thumbs over the ridged tips, responding to her sighs of need.
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