Let It Bree: Let It Bree / Can't Buy Me Louie. Colleen Collins

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Let It Bree: Let It Bree / Can't Buy Me Louie - Colleen  Collins

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of the spaceship panel in the sci-fi book he’d been reading lately. It starred a mighty warrior, Tarl Cabot, in the strange counter-Earth planet of Gor.

      Only this wasn’t Gor, it was Nederland, the funky counter-Earth mountain community an hour outside Denver, Colorado. And Kirk wasn’t a mighty, solitary warrior trying to save the galaxy. He was a frustrated, soon-to-be-married paleobotanist trying to analyze the problem with this damn van. If he was in his old trustworthy Jeep, he’d know exactly what to do.

      But no, his future mother-in-law—with too much time and money on her hands—had had this state-of-the-art van delivered to Kirk on his excavation site yesterday outside Allenspark, Colorado. She called it a wedding gift, but Kirk knew it was really an expensive reminder that he was saying “I do” to her daughter Alicia in forty-eight hours, preceded by a rehearsal dinner in twenty-four hours, and he needed to get his dirt-caked, fossil-loving self home.

      He stared at the dashboard and its myriad gadgets and buttons. So many, not even a scientist knew what to poke, prod or punch.

      Honk. Honk.

      Kirk glanced in the sideview mirror and caught the reflection of a blue pickup. It was early evening, the world glazed gray with winter, but he could discern that the hood ornament was a tarnished peace sign.

      Honk. Honk.

      “Give peace a chance,” muttered Kirk.

      Honk. Honk.

      He scanned the dashboard one last time. So what if he had a doctorate and was on the verge of a major scientific breakthrough—right now, he was having one hell of a time figuring out this space-age dashboard. “Best option is to treat this contraption like I do my Jeep when it stalls. Pop it into second and let the good times roll!”

      Kirk opened the door and jumped out, the impact of his six-one, two-hundred-pound body spraying January slush on his shoes and pants. Screw it. After countless hikes and digs, his boots and clothes had been caked with everything from Patagonian granite flakes to Arctic ice slivers. A little Colorado snow was nothing.

      The chill bit his face. This part of the road was on a decline, so he ran a few steps, one hand against the open door, the other on the steering wheel. His footsteps sloshed. His breath came fast. The white van, covered with dirt and slush, rolled forward. Kirk jumped back into the driver’s seat, popped the clutch and punched the gas. The van lurched, sputtered and stalled.

      Rolling silently down a dark curving road, he eased the van onto the road shoulder. He set the brake and cut the engine. He recalled the gas gauge showing there was some fuel, so it couldn’t be out of gas.

      In the Rockies, on these mountain roads with no streetlights, night settled quickly. Kirk fumbled along the dashboard and pressed a button with the image of a light. The headlights blazed to life, cutting two tunnels of white through the descending darkness.

      “Help!”

      He looked up. In the haze of headlights stood a woman.

      “Help!” She pumped her hands wildly up and down as though yelling the word wasn’t enough.

      He threw open the door and jumped down. “What’s wrong?” he yelled, jogging toward her. She wore tattered jeans, scuffed leather boots, a blue-and-white checkered shirt. She didn’t appear to be physically hurt.

      “My—” She gasped a breath. “My friend and I need a ride.”

      He halted. “You’re hitchhiking in these mountains at night?” The heat of his breath condensed into frozen particles on his mustache. Damn. It was too cold to be chatting with some hitchhiking cowgirl.

      And too cold for her to be dressed in nothing but a shirt and jeans.

      He started to take off his jacket to offer her when an instinctual warning shot through him. “Friend?” He looked around.

      “Pe-pet,” the street girl said softly, waving her hand dismissively as though she’d simply misspoken. “My pet and I are…lost.”

      A strength shone through her big, gray eyes. In his gut, he trusted that look. She wasn’t helpless, but she needed help.

      He unzipped his jacket and tossed it to her. “Put this on. Let’s get you and your—” he looked around for a puppy or a dog “—pet into the van before all three of us turn into icicles.”

      Her smile was so appreciative as she slid her arms into the jacket that, despite the cold, his insides melted. Alicia had never given him a look of such sweet gratefulness.

      Forget sweet looks. You’re almost married.

      “Your pet can sit on your lap in the front seat.” There should be enough fuel to get them to a gas station. He’d traveled this stretch of mountain road plenty—around the bend was the Sundance Lodge and Café, a few miles farther was a place to fill up.

      “He’s, uh, too big to sit on my lap.”

      He? Oh, yeah, the pet. “Okay, option two.” Kirk walked briskly to the van’s rear doors. “Back here.” What did this girl own? A Saint Bernard? Great Dane?

      He opened the doors, figuring he’d drop this girl and her dog at the station, where they could call for a ride home and have a warm place to wait. He’d fill up and continue into Denver.

      His thoughts were interrupted by the thud-thud-thud of steps punctuated with heavy, beastly snorts.

      Kirk’s stomach clenched. His mouth went dry.

      Staring him down, heaving breaths of steam, stood a ferocious-looking bull with a hump on its back the size of a small mountain. The moonlight, gilding the beast in a surreal silver, added to the monstrous effect.

      “He’s gentle,” the girl said, as though hanging out with ferocious animals was an everyday sort of thing.

      Kirk glanced around—where had she hidden this creature? Spying the clusters of trees that hugged the road, he had his answer.

      “His name’s Valentine,” she continued.

      “I—I don’t care if his name’s Sweetheart,” Kirk said, finding his voice, “that’s one big mother of a—” This was not the time for conversation. This was time to move. Run like hell. Unfortunately, his body had other ideas. Like remaining frozen where he stood. If only he hadn’t tossed her his jacket, part of him would be warm enough to flee, encouraging the rest of his body to follow.

      The girl blinked, obviously realizing the terrifying effect of her “pet.” “Oh, I’m sorry.” She grabbed the brass ring in the beast’s nose. “See, he’s under control.”

      A street cowgirl holding a ferocious bull by the ring in its nose. Oh yeah, that would definitely stop the animal from charging and pummeling Kirk Dunmore into a grease spot.

      “I’ll take him to the back of the van,” the girl continued breezily. “I’m sure Valentine can fit easily inside. He can lower himself onto his knees and scrunch down. He’s special that way.”

      He’s special that way? Kirk had to put a stop to this, now. What would Tarl Cabot, the mighty, solitary hero of Gor do at a time like this?

      The

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