of everything.’
‘Everything?’ She choked as unexpected laughter rolled up her throat. ‘You’re serious, aren’t you?’
‘Yep.’ The excitement was back, and she was glad. Then Cooper grinned. ‘Starting with bassinets. I’m taking that one.’ He tapped the one he’d nodded at earlier.
‘But I like that one.’ She laughed. ‘Though not as keen on the elephants as the butterflies.’
‘It’s mine. I saw it first.’ Then he locked his gaze on hers. ‘Unless you really, really want it.’
She shook her head. ‘It’s yours. I’ve just seen another one I like better. Which baby bath do you think?’
‘We need help here.’ Cooper looked around for a shop assistant and soon had people following them, writing down everything they selected so that deliveries could be made to their respective homes next week.
But slowly Sophie’s enthusiasm died. Why were they doing this? Sure, she needed to set up for her baby, but Cooper? He didn’t need quite as many things as her. It was as though he intended having the baby living with him a lot, not for some weekends when he wasn’t working.
‘I see an in-depth discussion coming on.’ Cooper nudged her as he slid his credit card back into his wallet after paying for everything, against her wishes. ‘What’s up? You not happy with me decking my house out for my daughter?’
She hadn’t thought it through properly when she’d said she’d never prevent him being a part of their child’s life. ‘She’s going to be living with me.’
‘Most of the time, sure. I’m making her comfortable when she visits me, though.’ His mouth tightened. ‘You’re not reneging on your promise of allowing me to be a part of her life?’
‘No, I wouldn’t do that. Never. Not after the way my parents treated me.’ But... ‘We need to draw up legal papers covering custody and what comes about in the event of something happening to me. Or you.’ Sophie wanted to slap her forehead. She’d been very remiss not thinking about this sooner.
‘You are right. We should see a lawyer.’ Taking her elbow, he led her outside to his car. ‘Talk about deflating the moment.’
‘I’m sorry,’ she snapped. ‘Actually, no, I’m not. We were having fun when this is serious. We haven’t thought everything through. There’re so many legal ramifications about being parents it’s terrifying. I’ve been completely irresponsible.’
‘Don’t go blaming yourself, Sophie. I admit none of this had occurred to me either. It would’ve, eventually.’ His sigh was loud and despondent. ‘Why today when I was enjoying myself?’
Her stance softened. ‘Yeah, that was fun, wasn’t it?’ Then she got wound up again. ‘This goes to show how unprepared to be a good mother I am.’
‘We’re not going there. For now we agree we’ll sort out the legal stuff ASAP. In the meantime let’s go home.’
Home. Again that word sank into her like a ball of warmth. If only. ‘Let’s,’ was all she said.
‘How’s the body? I bet you’ve got some major bruises after throwing yourself on the ground.’
‘One or two.’ She ached in a lot of places.
‘You don’t think you need to talk to someone about your reaction to a backfiring car?’ A load of caution laced his question, like he wasn’t sure of her reaction. ‘I’m thinking of the baby and what harm you could cause her throwing yourself down like that. Once she’s born she’ll be more vulnerable if you’re holding her.’
She’d presume he cared, and wasn’t about to tell her she was incompetent to be his daughter’s mother. She also got that he was only concerned about the baby. Fair enough. That’s how she was supposed to want it. A timely reminder that she was still on her own. ‘I saw the shrink in Darwin when I first got there, and was told I did not have PTSD, or if I did it was very mild.’ Despite the annoyance winding up tight inside her, she conceded, ‘But a second time after eight months is concerning.’
‘Maybe you need to talk to someone again. Another opinion won’t hurt.’
Did that count when it came to her ability to be a good mother? ‘I’ll look into it.’
‘I know a good guy. We were in the army together one tour. I’ll give him a ring tomorrow, get you an appointment.’
Forget annoyed. Anger burst out of her mouth. ‘Stop bossing me around. I’ll make my own arrangements, thank you very much.’ She seethed. ‘Who do you think you are? Telling me what to do, who to see, where to shop? It’s got to stop. Now. I was perfectly capable of looking after myself before I met you. Nothing’s changed.’ She was yelling, but seriously? The guy needed a bash over the head.
‘No problem. Just thought I could help, take some of the strain away from you.’
What strain? Babies were delivered every day and no one suffered badly. A yawn ripped through her. She was exhausted, and Cooper wasn’t helping by adding pressure to her already mounting worries. But he was here, had given her a place to stay, and helped organise furniture delivery. Tears spilled down her cheeks. What a mess she was. At sixes and sevens over everything. Another yawn dragged at her. A tired mess.
Yet the moment she walked inside Cooper’s house the tension plaguing her instantly fell away.
Yes, this house was a haven. A home. The kind of place she’d love to come back to at the end of a busy day, or stay put in on days her baby was grizzly.
Her hands splayed across her belly. This had to stop. It was imperative she move into her own place—fast. Turn the apartment into something as comforting as Cooper’s home, without him there. Of course she’d delayed. She didn’t know where to start, how to create a home that she and baby would be safe and secure in. She’d never known that for herself. Growing up, home had been the place where she’d slept and eaten and done her homework and listened to her parents arguing. Her bedroom the sanctuary she’d hidden in when the arguing had escalated into a full-scale war. Not once had she ever walked in the front door and sighed with contentment. As she did here. Talk about being in big trouble.
‘Sophie? Are you all right? You’re not having pains, are you?’ Cooper hovered over her, anxiety replacing the cool demeanour he’d shown since they’d talked about her supposed PTSD.
‘I’m fine. No pains.’ Just a crazy revelation that she had to deal with. She was not staying here permanently. Like to or not, she had to move on, set up her own life. Just as she’d planned since learning she was pregnant.
So get on with it.
‘You’d tell me?’ The anxiety hung between them.
‘Yes.’ Locking eyes with Cooper, she said with all the force she could muster, ‘I will let you know the moment I think I’m in labour.’ She couldn’t keep him out of the picture on that score. When she’d gone into meltdown over the lack of movement from the baby Cooper had given her strength when she’d needed someone to cling to. She couldn’t push him away over this.
‘Good.’ He tossed his car keys up in the air, snatched them and repeated
