them, his stomach had been in knots. Stan had a feeling that Mr Fucking Charming Bollocks wanted to take his daughter away on holiday and, if that was the case, he’d be far from happy about it.
Hearing a car engine, Joyce jumped out of her chair and lifted the curtain. She’d been bubbling with excitement all morning and was dying to know what Eddie needed to see them for. With a bit of luck he wanted to ask their permission to marry Jess.
‘Here he is,’ Joyce said, as the posh gold Mercedes pulled up.
Eddie picked up the bouquet and bottle of Chivas Regal he’d bought, and strolled up the path.
‘How lovely to see you again, Joyce,’ he said, handing her the flowers.
‘Awww, you shouldn’t have, they’re beautiful. Let me put them in a vase.’
Eddie gave Jessica a lingering kiss and then followed her into the living room.
‘Jess said you liked a drop of Scotch,’ he said, handing Stan the bottle.
‘Thanks,’ Stan said ungratefully. If Eddie had turned up bearing solid gold bars, he still wouldn’t like the bastard.
‘Go and keep your mum company while I have a little chat with your dad,’ Eddie told his girlfriend.
Jess gave his hand a good-luck squeeze and left the room.
Not one to go round the houses, Eddie came straight to the point. ‘I have fallen head over heels for your Jessica, Mr Smith. She means the world to me and I would like to ask for her hand in marriage.’
Stanley felt every hair on his body stand up on end. Aware of his heart racing and his hands shaking, he urged Eddie to pour him a drink. Aware that Stan had turned a whiter shade of pale, Eddie was quite concerned.
‘You don’t look very well. Are you OK?’ he asked, as he handed him a large Scotch.
Stanley downed the drink in one and immediately asked for a refill.
Desperate for an answer from the shivering wreck of a man, Eddie continued talking. ‘Look, I know how you must feel and I know Jessica is still very young. But, I promise you, Mr Smith, you have my word that I will cherish and take good care of her.’
Unable to think of anything nice to say, Stanley grabbed the bottle of Chivas Regal and poured himself yet another.
‘It’s not up to me. Go and ask her mother,’ Stanley muttered.
Eddie stood up and walked into the kitchen. ‘Go and see your dad, Jess, I need to have a chat with your mum.’
Joyce smiled as he closed the kitchen door. ‘Would you like some fruit cake?’ she asked.
Eddie shook his head and cut straight to the chase. ‘I am totally in love with your Jessica and I want to marry her. I’ve had a little chat with your husband and he said it’s up to you, Joyce. I know she’s very young, but I promise you with all my heart that I’ll take good care of her.’
To say Joyce was over the moon was putting it mildly. Unable to stop herself, she flung her arms around Eddie’s neck.
‘I am so happy,’ she sobbed. ‘Welcome to the family, Eddie. My Jessica is a very lucky girl and I’d be proud to call you my son-in-law.’
Eddie smiled. ‘I’ve got a bottle of champagne in the car. I’ll bring it in and we can have a toast.’
Joyce sorted out her best crystal glasses and took four into the living room. She hugged Jessica. ‘Congratulations, darling. Eddie’s a wonderful man – you’ve bagged yourself a good one there.’
Noticing Stanley had a face like a smacked arse, Joyce kicked his leg. ‘For Christ’s sake cheer up, you miserable old bastard.’
Stanley said nothing as he was handed a glass of champagne.
Eddie kissed Jessica gently on the forehead. ‘I’m taking Jess to Hatton Garden to choose a ring this afternoon. She can have the biggest diamond in the shop.’
Joyce couldn’t wipe the smile off her face. The only rock Stan had ever bought her was a poxy old topaz. ‘You’ll have to pop back and show me your ring,’ she said to Jess.
‘I’ll show you tomorrow. Now we’re engaged to be married, you don’t mind if I stay round Ed’s tonight, do you, Mum? We want to go out for a meal to celebrate and we won’t be back till late.’
Joyce nodded. ‘That’s fine by me, love.’
Stanley looked at his wife in disgust. His daughter wasn’t even married yet and Joyce was encouraging her to hawk her mutton.
‘To my beautiful wife-to-be,’ Eddie said, holding his glass aloft.
‘To Jessica and Eddie,’ Joycie crowed.
Stan looked at the clock. It was nearly half-past one and he was late to meet Jock. Desperate to get away from the man who had led his daughter astray, he stood up. ‘I’m going out now.’
‘You can’t go out yet. We’re in the middle of a celebration,’ Joyce said angrily.
Eddie decided to stick up for his future father-in-law. ‘It’s fine, Joyce. To be honest, me and Jess need to make a move now ourselves. I’ll drop you at the pub, Stan, if you like?’
Stanley shook his head. He’d rather crawl there on all fours than get inside Eddie’s car.
Joyce tutted as her husband slunk away and then hugged both Jessica and Eddie. ‘Have a nice evening and if you can’t be good, be careful,’ she giggled.
Feeling herself going red, Jessica dragged Eddie out of the front door. ‘My mum is just so embarrassing at times,’ she moaned to her fiancé.
Eddie waved at Joyce as they drove away. The old girl would jump in the river if he asked her to, but he’d have to work a bit harder if he was to win over the old man.
A few days after his engagement to Jessica, Eddie picked his father up at four o’clock in the morning. Butch wasn’t expected to pick up the horsebox till around half-five, but his dad was keen to get there well before his intended victim.
Harry got into the car with a sports bag in his hand. ‘What’s in there?’ Eddie asked him.
‘Bolt-cutters. There’s a yard bang opposite where Butch keeps the box. We’ll cut the lock off and hide in there.’
‘We’re a bit early, ain’t we?’ Ed said.
‘Do a right here, son. We’re not going in your motor, we’ll pick up the old Bedford van. It’s still registered to some cunt in Luton, so worst ways we can burn it out if we need to.’
Eddie followed his father’s directions and they swapped motors. Driving towards Stratford, Eddie told him about Jessica. ‘I proposed to her at the weekend, Dad. I dunno when we’ll get married yet, but I bought her a nice engagement ring. You’ll have to meet her soon. She’s a right little cracker and I know you’ll like her.’
Harry
